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Pick-Up Lines That Might Get You Killed

  1. If you and I were squirrels, could I bust a nut in your hole?

  2. I'd like to wrap your legs around my head and wear you like a feed bag.

  3. If it's true that we are what we eat, I could be you by morning!

  4. How do you like your eggs: poached, scrambled, or fertilized?

  5. I was about to go masturbate and I needed a name to go with your face.

  6. My love for you is like diarrhea, I just can't hold it in.

  7. Roses are red. Violets are blue. I like spaghetti. Let's go fuck.

  8. Is that a keg in your pants? 'Cause I would love to tap that ass!!!!!

  9. If your right leg was Thanksgiving, and your left leg was Christmas, could I meet you between the holidays?

  10. You remind me of a championship bass, I don't know whether to mount you or eat you!

  11. Your parents must be retarded, because you are special.

  12. Can I touch your belly button . . . from the inside?

  13. I'm not too good at algebra, but doesn't U+I = 69?

  14. How about we play lion and lion tamer? You hold your mouth open, and I'll put my head in.

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