Chocolate

A blonde walks into an ice cream shop and asks

How many blondes does it take to make chocolate

A man goes to the nursing home to visit his 84

A guy took his girlfriend to the movies. During

Valentines Day is here again, and with it the perfect

Dear Mr. Blix, Welcome to Iraq! It is so good

Knock, knock Whoââ,¬â"¢s there? Sorry,

1. ââ,¬Å"If my heart were a baked potato,

What's grosser than gross? Dreaming about eating

Bush happens Life is like a box of chocolates.

What is Homer Simpson's favorite ice cream?

A man walked into an ice cream shop... Man: I'd

A blonde wanted to go ice fishing, so after getting

10) Who the hell Begets anymore? 9) Memo to Adam:

A woman goes to an ice cream parlor and asks for

How many perverts does it take to put in a light

One day a preacher goes to visit an elderly lady.

An old man and a young man work together in an

Why did it take four hours for the blonde to make

You're so fat that you bleed chocolate milk.

(Disclaimer--Some of this stuff is illegal.) *Ask

Q: How many blondes does it take to make chocolate

A hippie saunters into an urban Bar & Grill and

A man walks into the ice cream shop with his three

* We got off the Titanic first. * We can scare

20) With chocolate size doesn't matter; it's always

A man named George was new in the city and needed

Mama always told me girls are like a box of chocolate

Why did the elephant stand on the marshmallow?

Q. What do you get when you mix chocolate and

This is actually a true story that happened to

How can you tell when a blonde has been baking

You don't have to put cream in your coffee to

1) You can GET chocolate. 2) “If you love

Q: What's the difference between Bill Clinton and

'You Were an Accident' 'Strangers Have the Best

A guy goes to visit his grandmother and he brings

Breakfast: 1/2 grapefruit 1 slice whole wheat

1) Everyone around you has an attitude problem. 2)

People are always on the lookout for a new diet.

A man asked his wife what she'd like for her birthday. "I'd love to be six again," she replied. On

A tour bus driver drives with a bus full of Sun City Christmas Shopper Seniors down a highway, when

I am passing this on to you because it definitely worked for me, and we all could use more calm in

An elderly couple was watching television one evening. The wife said, "I am going to get a dish of

A little boy and girl go trick or treating. They knock on the door of this house and the man who

A man was sitting on the edge of the bed, observing his wife turning back and forth, looking at

MONDAY: It's fun to cook for Tom. Today I made angel food cake. The recipe said beat 12 eggs separately.

A minister decided that a visual demonstration would add emphasis to his Sunday sermon. Four worms

A tour bus driver is driving with a bus load of seniors down a highway when he is tapped on his shoulder

Life isn't like a box of chocolates; it's more like a jar of jalapenos: you never know what's going

I, __________________________, being of sound mind and body, do not wish to be kept alive indefinitely

Name of Boyfriend/Fiancé/Husband: I request permission for a leave of absence from the highest

I checked into a hotel on a business trip and was a bit lonely so I thought I'd get me one of those

If Recipes were like tax forms.... * Line 1. Butter, a minimum of half a pound (8 oz.), but not

An elderly man lay dying in his bed. In death's agony, he suddenly smelled the aroma of his favorite

The children were lined up in the cafeteria of a Catholic elementary school for lunch. At the head

25. Come up with 50 new shades of gray for Martha Stewart Paints. 24. Start marketing new "Martha

What do you expect from such simple creatures!? Their last name stays put. The garage is all

Men are like ....... Laxatives ...... They irritate the @#%$ out of you. Men are like ........

And God populated the earth with broccoli and cauliflower and spinach and green and yellow vegetables of

A man asked his wife what she'd like for her birthday. "I'd love to be six again," she replied.

Ben and Haley had gotten up in years, and their memories weren't quite what they used to be. They

A young lady stops by her grandmother's house on the way to a dance. She wants to introduce her boy