Sometimes

DOS Beer: Requires you to use your own can opener, and requires you to read the directions carefully

Enough with the Poking, Lets Just Have Sex He pokes her, she pokes him, they poke each other back

This story occurred on Melbourne radio. One of the stations has a competition where they ring someone

A woman went to a pet shop & immediately spotted a large, beautiful parrot. There was a sign on the cage

Once there was this doctor that moved out to the country to become a farmer. He said to himself, "Well,

A man dies and goes to Heaven. When he arrives

I, the penis, hereby request a raise in salary

"Ahhh! It's Yoda's little friend you seek!" "Nerrrm.

Years of straining with poopie-ing, we can only

A guy was limping, and his friend asked him what

In a long line of people waiting for a bank teller,

Whether the cause is a previous night of drinking

A hillbilly is sitting in a bar, drinking, when

One day a miserable toothbrush sits down and says,

One Sunday, a priest asked one of the church janitor

We all know those cute symbols made with keyboard

A tourist is in Spain, and goes to a fancy restaurant

If you throw a party, the worst thing you can do

(which in our society means over 25) An older

The Smiths had no children and decided to use a

Q: What's the difference between a blonde and an

Three bears came out of hibernation and they were

There was this man who really had to go to the

It's wise to remember how easily e-mail can be

Last 10 Things a Man Would Say: 10. I think Barry

I'm currently running the latest version of GirlFriend

Three women were sitting around talking about their

The FDA is considering additional warnings on beer

A teacher decides that she is going to teach her

A tourist has been visiting Cuba for a week. He

* It can be up or down. It's more fun when it's

Shit is a powerful word. Just think of all the

    A couple go to Mexico City for

There was a little boy named Johnny who used to

"You see a lot of smart guys with dumb women,

We all know those cute little computer symbols

Will the Real Dummy Please Stand Up?! AT&T

    DETROIT--With third-quarter

    The Penis requests a promotion

An FM station has a competition where they ring

    The following information was

Element Name: MAN Symbol: XY Atomic Weight: (180

Monica's Diary Entry 1 Dear Diary, I'm so excited!

GREAT TRUTHS THAT LITTLE CHILDREN HAVE LEARNED: 1) No matter how hard you try, you can't baptize cats. 2)

I rear-ended a car this morning. So, there we were alongside the road and slowly the other driver

You are driving down the road in your car on a wild, stormy night, when you pass by a bus stop and

Sometimes, when I look at my children, I say to myself ~~'Lillian, you should have remained a virgin.' --

Calling in sick to work makes me uncomfortable. No matter how legitimate my excuse, I always get the

The kindergarten class had a homework assignment to find out about something exciting and relate it

DRILL PRESS: A tall upright machine useful for suddenly snatching flat metal bar stock out of your

1) This is a picture of an octopus. It has eight testicles. (Kelly age 6) 2) Oysters' balls are

It's wise to remember how easily email can be misused, sometimes unintentionally, with serious consequences. Consider

An old man, Mr. Wallace, was living the last of his life in a nursing home. One day he appeared to

This preacher was looking for a good used lawnmower one day. He found one at a yard sale that Little

A man walks into his local pub with a big grin on his face. "What are you so happy about?" asks the

1. Bob Smith, my assistant programmer, can always be found 2. hard at work in his cubicle. Bob works

* Your fences need to be horse-high, pig-tight and bull-strong. * Keep skunks and bankers and

1. If you are choking on an ice cube, don't panic. Simply pour a cup of boiling water down your throat

Note: Sometimes a story comes along that needs no polishing or enhancement to make it better.

Some of us Southerners are pretty skeptical of horoscopes and the people that read them. If we are

Pinocchio had a human girlfriend who would sometimes complain about splinters when they were having

"Change is inevitable, except from a vending machine." "I love cats...they taste just like chicken" "Out

Some people say that I'm superficial, but that's just on the surface. On one hand, I'm indecisive;

Here's why . According to today's regulators and bureaucrats, those of us who were kids in the 40's,

Rhonda went to a pet shop and immediately spotted a large beautiful parrot. There was a sign on the

10. Sometimes stays in bed till after 6 am. 9. In his sock drawer, you find pictures of women

In a long line of people waiting for a bank teller, one guy suddenly started massaging the back of

Some of us Southerners are pretty skeptical of horoscopes and the people that read them. If we are

If you recall the old Hollywood Squares show, this will bring a tear to your eyes. They are worth

Description Missus manifests as a female humanoid providing cooking/cleaning features, and a sitting-room/TV

You are driving along in your car on a wild, stormy night, when you pass by a bus stop, and you see

"Managing senior programmers is like herding cats." - -Dave Platt "Do not meddle in the affairs

At a convention of biological scientists, one researcher remarks to another, "Did you know that in

The Smiths were unable to conceive children, and decided to use a surrogate father to start their

Teacher asked her class to use 'definitely' in a sentence. Jane raised her hand and said, "The sky

1. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us. 2. Learn to work the toilet seat; if

Three nurses went to heaven, and were awaiting their turn with St. Peter to plead their case to enter

A redneck farmer was disturbed when he found out his son was masturbating several times a day out in

Programmer compiled an array of reasons as to why he can't find a girlfriend with a good on her , reason