Warning

Warning on a curling iron: Do Not Insert Curling Iron Into Any Bodily Orifice... My bathroom has inadequate

Last year, my friend upgraded his GirlFriend 3.1 to GirlFriendPlus1.0 (marketing name: Fiancee1.0). Recently

A nun and a priest were crossing the Sahara desert on a camel. On the third day out the camel suddenly

1. How many trarlokks does it take to trokkclap

There was a farmer who grew watermelons. He was

1. Calculate the smallest limb diameter on a persimmon

Valentines Day is here again, and with it the perfect

A young man was lost wandering in a forest, when

3 men die and go to heaven. One's a marine, one's

"If you run, you'll only go to jail tired." "The

An Alabama man turned 18 and went to a local house

Whether the cause is a previous night of drinking

OBJECTIVE To disengage said bra without looking

A virgin boy turns 18, and asks his dad for money

* Adjust the tint on your TV so that all the people

1. A few fries short of a Happy Meal. 2. The

The Alaska Department of Fish and Game recently

MEMORANDUM RE: Computer Software Warning Last

1. Ride mechanical horses with coins fished out

Guy 1: Hey! Why do you smoke cigarettes even though

WARNING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!There is a new virus : Viagra

1. I can't reach my license unless you hold my

The FDA is considering additional warnings on beer

Element: Woman Symbol: Wo Discoverer: Adam

An Amish lady is trotting down the road in her

If the government is going to put health warning

    What to not say to the nice

But Doctor, You HAVE To! In Turkey, Mehmet Esirgen, 52,

At a recent computer expo (COMDEX), Bill Gates

As a senior citizen was driving down the freeway,

ON A KOREAN KITCHEN KNIFE: Warning keep out

15 - You spent Sunday night in jail for cow-tipping

Next mood swing: 6 minutes I hate everybody, you're next. And your point is.............? I

An Amish lady is trotting down the road in her horse and buggy when she is pulled over by a cop. "Ma'am,

Calling in sick to work makes me uncomfortable. No matter how legitimate my excuse, I always get the

Even if you aren't a skier, you'll be able to appreciate the humor of the slopes as written by a New

A little old lady is walking down the street, dragging two plastic garbage bags, one in each hand. There's

An Amish lady is trotting down the road in her horse and buggy when she is pulled over by a cop.

The Center for Disease Control has issued a warning about a new virulent strain of Sexually Transmitted

here is a dangerous virus being passed electronically, orally and by hand. This virus is called Worm-Overload-Recreational-Killer

No matter what you do or where you go, you're always going to be yourself. And Panexa knows this. Your

I hate it when people forward bogus warnings...but this one is real, and it's important. So please

The Center for Disease Control has issued a warning about a new virulent strain of Sexually Transmitted

Dear Tech Support: Last year I upgraded from Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife 1.0. I soon noticed that the

*Forget world peace. Visualize using your turn signal. *I used to have a handle on life, but it broke. *WANTED:

* Your kid may be an honors student, but you're still an idiot. * Learn from your parents' mistakes

"Change is inevitable, except from a vending machine." "I love cats...they taste just like chicken" "Out

PARIS HILTON CALLS FOR END TO SWIFT BOAT FLAP Says It's drawing Attention Away From Her Hotel

Who says cops don't have a sense of humor? The following were taken off of actual police car videos

A cop stops a car for traveling faster than the posted speed limit. Since he's in a good mood that

Warning on a bottle of drain cleaner: "If you do not understand, or cannot read, all directions,

Police are warning all men who frequent clubs, parties and local pubs to be alert and stay cautious

A friend just got back from a holiday ski trip to Utah with the kind of story that warms the cockles

We are sick and tired of hearing about how dumb people in the South are. We challenge any so-called

An office manager was given the task of hiring an individual to fill a job opening. After sorting through

At a recent computer expo (COMDEX), Bill Gates reportedly compared the computer industry with the auto

There was a farmer who grew watermelons. He was doing pretty well, but he was disturbed by some local

In case you need further proof that the human race is doomed because of stupidity, here are some actual

*A few clowns short of a circus *A few fries short of a Happy Meal *An experiment in Artificial Stupidity *A

Two aliens landed in the Arizona desert near an abandoned gas station. They approached the gas

A duck walks into a bar and asks the bartender for some quackers. The bartender explains that the bar

With no warning and clear out of the blue, a husband said to his wife, "Honey, I have invited a friend

One day, a blonde who lived on the 12th floor of a high-rise apartment building was out on her balcony,

A guy went to visit a friend at the hospital. His friend was all busted up and in several casts. After