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Jokes

Jokes From Doctors

A man comes into the ER and yells, "My wife's going to have her baby in the cab!"I grabbed my stuff,

The Twist

It's the Spring of 1957 and Bobby goes to pick up his date. He's a pretty hip guy with his own car. When

Pay A-tention

The Lone Ranger and Tonto were camping out one

Don't Choke

Two cowboys walk into a roadhouse to wash the trail

Dear Abby: My husband is a liar and a cheat

Dear Abby: My husband is a liar and a cheat. He

There was a man who loved baked beans...

There was a man who loved baked beans, but they

How many lawyers does it take to change a...

How many lawyers does it take to change a lightbulb? ââ,¬Å"Such

The Bible for Dummies

AMEN: The only part of a prayer that everyone knows. BULLETIN:

Redneck Engineering Exam

1. Calculate the smallest limb diameter on a persimmon

Lipstick at School

According to a news report, a certain private school

Good for the Heart

A man had a terrible passion for baked beans, but

Summer School for Slackers

Fail a class? Drop one too many? Don't worry about

Spring of 1957

It's the spring of 1957 and Bobby, a pretty hip

Little Johnny and the ABC's

One day, Little Johnny's class was reviewing the

Urinate

Mrs. Flebs, a teacher, was standing in front of

Split Up The Middle

Once there were two twins, Joe and John. Joe was

The Firing Squad

A man was scheduled to go before a firing squad

Lawyers and Lightbulbs, Case #3

How many lawyers does it take to change a light

Hurricane & Marriage

How is a hurricane like a marriage? At the beginning

Take My Wife, Please

* The last fight was my fault. My wife asked, ''What's

Work Genesis

In the beginning was the Plan. And then came

12 Days of Christmas

Dearest John, I went to the door today and the

The Great Wiener Caper

One day, two drunks were stumbling around in the

Peeing Leprechaun

A leprechaun and his friend walked into a bar one

Mermaid Fishing

These three guys are out having a relaxing day

Signs That You are Too Drunk

You lose arguments with inanimate objects. You

Ah, Fugettaboudit

An elderly husband and wife noticed that they were

Signs That You're A Drunk

1. You lose arguments with inanimate objects.

Radical Procedure

Joe was moderately successful in his career, but

Never Seen A Priest

An old man from a far off land was once on the

Baked beans and their delightful tune

A man had a terrible passion for baked beans, but

Free Sex Contestants

Two men drove to a gas station for a fill-up

Out Of College

You don't know what time Taco Bell closes anymore. Your

Men vs. Women: Round 1

NICKNAMES If Laura, Suzanne, Debra and Rose

Priest's First Mass

A new priest at his first mass was so nervous he

Historical Origin of The "Finger"

This is not meant to be crude. It is strictly for

Difference Between Men and Women

1. A man will pay $2 for a $1 item he wants. A

The 12 Days of Christmas

December 14, 1972 My dearest darling John:

Lipstick in School

According to a news report, a certain private school in Washington was recently faced with a unique

Good Quotes

Sometimes, when I look at my children, I say to myself ~~'Lillian, you should have remained a virgin.' --

Man + Woman

ROMANCE MATHEMATICS Smart man + smart woman = romance Smart man + dumb woman = affair Dumb

The Elderly Couple

An elderly couple who were childhood sweethearts had married & settled down in their old neighborhood.

Greenland

A US Air Force C-141 is scheduled to leave Thule Air Base, Greenland at midnight. During the pilot's

Remember This At Christmas Time

According to the Alaska Department of Fish and Game, while both male and female reindeer grow antlers

Christmas Story for people having a bad day....

When four of Santa's elves got sick, and the trainee elves did not produce the toys as fast as the

25 Signs You Have Grown Up

1. Your houseplants are alive, and you can't smoke any of them. 2. Having sex in a twin bed is out

1957

It's the Spring of 1957 and Bobby goes to pick up his date. He's a pretty hip guy with his own car.

Childhood Sweethearts

An elderly couple who were childhood sweethearts had married & settled down in their old neighborhood. To

History Lesson

History began some 12,000 years ago.(Actually, it was 40,000 years ago.) Humans existed as members

The Angel

Not long ago and far away, Santa was getting ready for his annual trip...but there were problems everywhere.

Profound Statements

How many men does it take to open a beer? None. It should be opened when she brings it. ------------------------------------------------------------------- Why

Time Tested

The secret of a good sermon is to have a good beginning and a good ending; and to have the two as

25 Signs You've Grown Up:

Your house plants are alive, and you can't smoke any of them. Having sex in a twin bed is out

Mirrors

According to a news report, a certain private school in Washington recently was faced with a unique

New Vocabulary For The Office

Essential NEW WORDS FOR 2004 editions for the work-place vocabulary: BLAMESTORMING Sitting around

Doctor's Stories

A man comes into the ER and yells, "My wife's going to have her baby in the cab!" I grabbed my stuff,

Yankee Test

We are sick and tired of hearing about how dumb people in the South are. We challenge any so-called

C-141

A US Air Force C-141 was scheduled to leave Thule Air Base, Greenland at midnight. During the pilot's

Headache

The Doctor said: "The good news is I can cure your headaches...The bad news is that it will require

The Ant and the Grasshopper

CLASSIC VERSION: The ant works hard in the withering heat all summer long, building his house

Federal Agencies

Almost 150 years ago, President Lincoln found it necessary to hire a private investigator - Alan

Lawyer in Heaven

A lawyer died. At the same moment, the Pope also died. They arrived at the gates of heaven at

Wrong Tee Off

It was a sunny Saturday morning on the course and I was beginning my pre-shot routine, visualizing

The Journalist and the Sheep

In the old Wild West, a Eastern newspaper correspondent had just arrived in a new Western town when