black

The big-game hunter walked into the bar and bragged to everyone about his skills as a hunter. The man

This one is long but well worth reading!In case your frustration level rises today, this is for everyone

A man staggers into an emergency room with two black eyes and a five iron wrapped tightly around his

An Arab has spent many days crossing the desert without finding a source of water. It gets so bad that

A blond man showed up at work one day with a black eye. When his co-workers saw him they asked him what

Ah huay went for a job interview, and when the manager saw him wearing a colorful shirt, golden hair,

A guy walks into a pharmacy and says to the pharmacist, "Listen, I have three girls coming over tonight.

It was the first day of school and a new student, the son of a Japanese businessman, entered the fourth

At school, a boy was told by a classmate that most adults are hiding at least one dark secret, and that

An Arab has spent many days crossing the desert without finding a source of water. It gets so bad that

At school, Little Johnny was told by a classmate that most adults are hiding at least one dark secret,

A psychiatrist advised his timid little patient to assert himself. "Don't let your wife bully you. Go

One day when the teacher walked to the black board, she noticed someoneandwritten the word 'penis' in

A little girl and her dog are walking through the

Here's a dilemma... With all your honor and dignity,

Once upon a time there were three little pigs.

Here's a dilemma for you... With all your honor

There was a man who had worked all of his life,

A young polar bear walks up to his dad one day

A zebra went up to the zookeeper and said, "Am

Yo mama so old, she has dreams in black and white.

Life's like a bag of Jelly beans, no body likes

A tribal leader finds that his wife has had a white

Oh, Jason, take me!" she panted, her breasts heaving

Yo mama's so poor, she only has two channels on

A man is lying in bed in a hospital with an oxygen

One day a blonde went into a department store.

One day a cucumber, pickle and a penis were all

What did Ike say to Tina when she came in late

Angelina Jolie: Puckered squid in mammary sauce

A Drunken Night A guy wakes up in a drunken stupor,

One day a little boy asks his mom questions about

1) Compassionativity is not a word. 2) Social

God: Men, what car you get in Heaven will depend

"There are only two reasons to sit in the back

Hearts and roses and kisses galore... What the

Ice Cube Mix Tricycle Kickstand Solar Flashlight Dehydrated

The Keith Richards: Smoked lungfish on a toasted

MONDAY 8:00 - "Husseinfeld" 8:30 - "Mad About Everything" 9:00

Thousands of people flock to the annual Burning

George W. Bush was giving a third-grader a lesson

A blonde buys two horses and she can't tell them

--That comment about Elton being "twice the woman"

1. Your dog rather rub up against the wall than

OBJECTIVE To disengage said bra without looking

"Husseinfeld" "Mad About Everything" "U.S. Military

A couple had been married for a long time, but

There was this guy who lived in Chicago. He was

There was a 80 year-old man that married a 21 year-old

An American cowboy was traveling in England and

What is black and charred and sits at the top of

This guy hears that there's good bear hunting up

A black cow was standing in the middle of the

There is this third grade class with this kid named

There's a guy who lives in Ohio. One morning, he

One day Adam's teacher told the class that everyone

What''s black, white, red all over, and doesn''t

The Alaska Department of Fish and Game recently

You sink your teeth into a steak and they stay

Q: What's black and sits on the roof? A: A paraplegic

What's black and white and red all over? A newspaper!

The proprietor of an adult store steps out to run

What's black and white, black and brown, and black

This Story is true!!! For all of you who occasionally

There once was a captain of a ship, and everyday

A guy with two black eyes walks into church one

A grade school teacher comes into class one morning

10) Collect potatoes. Paint faces on them and

What did the big black bucket say to the little

A man walks into a whorehouse looking for a little

One day, a man walks into a whorehouse and says,

What's black and white and red all over? An

One day a guy dies and finds himself in hell. Walking

For years it has been believed that electric bulbs

What do a peroxide blonde and a 747 have in common?

ARKANSAS STATE RESIDENCY APPLICATION Name:

1. Ride mechanical horses with coins fished out

Nursery Crimes: Georgie Porgie, pudding and pie,kissed

A blonde had two horses, but she couldn't tell

One day, Mrs. James was taking a shower, when suddenly

Once there was a group of vampire bats that lived

A kindergarten class had a homework assignment

What's black and white and red all over? Mimes

A husband and wife had four boys. The odd part

What's brown and black and blue all over? A brunette

Yo mama is so fat that when she took a vacation

What do you call 300 white men chasing a black

There were two blondes as roommates and they both

What's black and brown and looks good on a lawyer?

A man walked into work on Monday with two black

A fellow walks into a bar very down on himself.

Q: What do you call a girl with braces?

A man claimed he could name any animal that was

Q: What's black and fuzzy and hangs from the ceiling?

Q: Why does NASA hire peroxide blondes ? A:

An atomic bomb went off in Washington and everyone

One morning, a man approached the first tee, only

If Oracle made toasters... They'd claim their

One day little Bill was playing in the sand out

Yo' mama so old, her dreams are in black and white!

What goes black, white, black, white, black, white,

A survey of top personnel executives of 100 major

In a trans-Atlantic flight, a plane passes through

1. The mouse is referred to as a "critter."

An old man and woman were married for years, even

Twas the Night before Christmas, and all through

      AT&T fired President John

Proof That Jewish Was Jewish: 1. He went into

A man runs into the vet's office carrying his dog,

A man staggers into an emergency room with two

NAME: "Expecteria Trouserius" (Trouser Snake) LOCATION:

Will the Real Dummy Please Stand Up?! AT&T

But Doctor, You HAVE To! In Turkey, Mehmet Esirgen, 52,

One day when the teacher walked to the black board,

Bobby Knight, after living a full life, died. When

Monica Lewinsky virus: Sucks all the memory

Why did the chicken cross the road? KINDERGARTEN

From an article in the Wall Street Journal, about

Some of the finest quotes from the Honorable Marion

"Husseinfeld" "Mad About Everything" "U.S. Military

Crazy Mike the Biker walks into a pharmacy and

Last name: ________________ First name (check

1. Men are NOT mind readers. 2. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put

While walking down the street one day a US senator is tragically hit by a truck and dies. His soul

A young woman was preparing for her wedding. She asked her mother to go out and buy a nice long black

Bad Metaphors from Stupid Student Essays (actually these are mostly similes, see Literary Terms) Her

The Best and Worst Comments Received: "Text is useless. I use it to kill roaches in my room."

The kindergarten class had a homework assignment to find out about something exciting and relate it

TWO DUCK HUNTERS FROM WISCONSIN: ABSOLUTELY A TRUE STORY HEARD ON A WISCONSIN RADIO STATION REPORTING

One day a guy dies and finds himself in hell. As he is wallowing in despair, he has his first meeting

An old man and woman were married for many years, even though, they hated each other. When they had

A motorcycle patrolman was rushed to the hospital with an inflamed appendix. The doctors operated

I've sure gotten old. I've had 2 By-pass surgeries. A hip replacement, new knees. Fought prostate

A man walks into the street and manages to get a taxi just going by. He gets into the taxi, and the

A little boy and girl go trick or treating. They knock on the door of this house and the man who

A guy walks into an adult store and asks for an inflatable doll. Guy behind the counter says, "Male

If your unfortunate enough to have to visit Yankee Country - like Boston (pronounced BAH-stin), this

I believe that sex is one of the most beautiful, natural, wholesome things that money can buy."

In light of the rising frequency of human - grizzly bear conflicts, the Alaska Department of Fish

Married 25 years, I took a look at my wife one day and said, "Honey, 25 years ago, we had a cheap apartment,

Shortly thereafter Jesse Jackson went to a Sears and started raising all kinds of hell in the appliance

A man and his friend were enjoying Deer Hunting Season in rural Arkansas near a blacktop highway. A

David Letterman's Top 10 reasons why there are no black NASCAR drivers: (I bet his life will be miserable

1. "I got kicked out of Riverdance for using my arms." - Michael Flatley (lead Riverdancer) 2.

Differential Theory of US Armed Forces (Snake Model) upon encountering a snake in the Area of Operations

A panda walked into a bar. He went up to the bar and said "I'd like a steak and kidney pie and a Coke

A young Technician and his General Manager board a train headed through the mountains on its way to

A Mexican family crosses the border to the Land of Milk and Honey where the streets are supposed

"Having sex is like playing bridge. If you don't have a good partner, you'd better have a good hand." Woody

In a Bucharest hotel lobby: The lift is being fixed for the day. During that time we regret that you

Accountant - Someone who knows the cost of everything and the value of nothing. Auditor - Someone

A guy is browsing in a pet shop and sees a parrot sitting on a little perch. It doesn't have any feet

10 INDISPUTABLE TRUTHS BLACK PEOPLE KNOW, BUT WHITE PEOPLE WON'T ADMIT: 1. Elvis is dead. 2.

One day, the teacher walks into her classroom and announces to the class that on each Friday, she will

Here's why . According to today's regulators and bureaucrats, those of us who were kids in the 40's,

On a transatlantic flight, a plane passes through a severe storm. The turbulence is awful, and things

10. Sometimes stays in bed till after 6 am. 9. In his sock drawer, you find pictures of women

An old man and woman were married for many years, even though they hated each other. When they had

Once upon a time in the Kingdom of Heaven, God was missing for six days. Eventually, Michael the Archangel

1. Chicago Cubs outfielder Andre Dawson on being a role model: "I wan' all dem kids to do what I do,

Sherry lost her husband almost four years ago and still hasn't gotten out of her mourning stage. Her

When you occasionally have a really bad day, and you just need to take it out on someone, don't take

SUNDAY: 0800 - My 33 Sons 0830 - Osama Knows Best 0900 - I Dream of Mohammed 0930 - Let's

1. When you call us to have your computer moved, be sure to leave it buried under half a ton of postcards,

A man is driving down a deserted stretch of highway when he notices a sign out of the corner of his

I took some friends out to dinner last week, and I noticed a spoon in the shirt pocket of our waiter

Dear Diary: Day 1 Just celebrated our 25th wedding anniversary with not much to celebrate. When

A man goes into an elevator, looks around and notices that he is alone except for this great, big,

The Wisconsin State Dept of Fish and Wildlife is advising hikers, hunters, fishermen and golfers

On their way home after celebrating their 25th anniversary, she thanks him for a wonderful evening.

A little kid asks his father, "Daddy, is God a man or a woman?" "Both son. God is both." After

At school Little Johnny was told by a classmate that most adults are hiding at least one dark secret,

One day, Jesus and the Devil were both working on their computers. Jesus was typing away. The Devil

Frank was excited about his new rifle, and decided to try bear hunting. He spotted a small brown

The Saudi Ambassador to the UN has just finished giving a speech, and walks out into the lobby where

A man staggers into an emergency room with a concussion, multiple bruises, two black eyes and a five

DEMOCRAT: You have two cows. Your neighbor has none. You feel guilty for being successful. You

Margaret is very upset as her husband Albert had just passed away. She went to the undertakers

WHAT'S BLACK AND BLUE AND BROWN AND LAYING IN A DITCH? A brunette who's told too many blonde jokes. WHAT

1. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us. 2. Learn to work the toilet seat; if

Almost 150 years ago, President Lincoln found it necessary to hire a private investigator - Alan

A missionary gets sent into deepest darkest Africa and goes to live with a tribe there. He spends

For those of you who have lived in Texas, you know how TRUE this is! They actually have a chili

A substitute teacher walks into the classroom on the blackboard she sees a message. It says, "Jimmy

One day, the teacher walks into her classroom and announces to the class that on each Friday, she will

Back in the early 80's Chevy Chase was one of the stars on Password. Toward the end of the game this

A child in class, when asked to draw a picture of the Holy Family, produced a picture in which Mary

A man takes the day off work and decides to go out golfing. He is on the second hole when he notices

A blind man and his guide dog enter a bar and find their way to a barstool. After ordering a drink

There are three blondes stranded on an island. Suddenly a fairy appears and offers to grant each one

A guy went to visit a friend at the hospital. His friend was all busted up and in several casts. After

A first grade class comes in from recess. Teacher asks Alice: "What did you do at recess?" Alice

An old man and woman were married for years even though they hated each other. When they had a confrontation,

At school, a boy is told by a classmate that most adults are hiding at least one dark secret, and that

A lady was in the delivery room starting to deliver her baby. As the head came out it was dark