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RENT FOR APARTMENT

A business man met a beautiful girl and asked her to spend the night with him for $500. And she did.Before

Jackass

This one is long but well worth reading!In case your frustration level rises today, this is for everyone

Birthday

Bob works hard and spends most evenings bowling or playing basketball at the gym. His wife thinks he

Do it like mammals

A woman goes to see a psychiatrist. ââ,¬Å"Doctor,ââ,¬Â

A manager walks into his office...

A manager walks into his office and sees a blonde

Dear Abby: My husband is a liar and a cheat

Dear Abby: My husband is a liar and a cheat. He

A man has six children...

A man has six children and is very proud of his

Backwoods High Tech

Backup - What you do when you run across a skunk

Famous People Say the Darndest Things

"There are only two reasons to sit in the back

Wee Jimmy's Poker

Little Jimmy had become a real nuisance while the

Pros/Cons of a Threesome

Advantages 1. It can get really weird 2. Someone

Lawyer Croaks

A guy phones a law firm and says, "I want to speak

Funny Answering Machine Messages

1) The president is not in his/her office at this

Little Johnny and the ABC's

One day, Little Johnny's class was reviewing the

Five Days of Christmas

Q: What did the blonde ask Santa Claus for Christmas?

Leprechaun on Spring Break

Two college students are in Ireland for a vacation

The Jackass Story

This Story is true!!! For all of you who occasionally

Dogs and Cats

A boy comes home one day and runs up to his mom.

English Penny Lane

Once there was a substitute teacher taking over

Three Nuns and a Parrot

Three nuns used to go to the church from their

Broken Down

Once there was this man whose car broke down.

One Side of a Phone Call between James Bond...

Hallo? Is this Giganta? Giganta Crotchetta? Oh,

12 Days of Christmas

Dearest John, I went to the door today and the

Baby Gates and Microsoft

For the first time in, oh, a decade, I think, something

Jet Fuel Alcoholics

Two airplane mechanics named Bob and Tim work at

Adult Education

Male Seminarsby Females 1.  Combatting 

Tiger Woods Wouldn't Do That

Tiger Woods     A couple were on

On The Job Training

Three couples were married and stayed at the same

Have Yourself a PC Little Christmas

    'Twas the night before Christmas

The 12 Days of Christmas

December 14, 1972 My dearest darling John:

Rent for Apartment

A businessman met a beautiful girl and agreed to spend the night with her for $500. They did their

Kittens

Calling in sick to work makes me uncomfortable. No matter how legitimate my excuse, I always get the

Kindergarden Class

The kindergarten class had a homework assignment to find out about something exciting and relate it

Having Fun with a Telemarketer

Me: Hello. AT&T: Hello, this is AT&T. Me: Is this AT&T? AT&T: Yes, this is AT&T. Me: This is

Diploma

A grandmother was pushing her little grandchild around Wal- Mart in a buggy. Each time she put something

Business Trip

I had checked into a hotel on a business trip and was a bit lonely so I thought I'd get me one of those

Dam Fish

There was a boy standing on a corner selling fish. He was saying, "Dam fish for sale, dam fish for

25 Signs You Have Grown Up

1. Your houseplants are alive, and you can't smoke any of them. 2. Having sex in a twin bed is out

Alabama Quarter

Hang on to any of the new State of Alabama quarters. If you have them; they may be worth much more

Old Friend's Home

A guy was invited to an old friends' home for dinner. His buddy preceded every request to his

What Time Is It?

On some air bases the Air Force is on one side of the field and civilian aircraft use the other

Wise Sayings

I believe that sex is one of the most beautiful, natural, wholesome things that money can buy."

Hot Water

John works hard and spends two nights each week bowling and plays golf every Saturday. His wife

All That Good Info

Pretty soon, I won't be able to do anything except sit in my chair and read! I must send my thanks

Psychiatric Hotline

We've all had the annoying experience of calling up a hotline and waiting on the phone for eons to

Signs That Your Are An Internet Geek

10. When filling out your driver's license application you give your IP address. 9. You no longer

Christmas Party

FROM: Patty Lewis, Human Resources Director TO: All Employees DATE: 1 October 2005 RE: Christmas

30 Years Difference

1972: Long hair 2002: Longing for hair 1972: The perfect high 2002: The perfect high yield mutual

Application for a Night Out with the Boys

Name of Boyfriend/Fiancé/Husband: I request permission for a leave of absence from the highest

Damned Old Age!

A couple in their nineties are BOTH having problems remembering things. They decide to go to the doctor

Call Girl

I checked into a hotel on a business trip and was a bit lonely so I thought I'd get me one of those

The Country House

At dawn the telephone rings. "Hello, Senor Humphrey? This is Ernesto the caretaker at your country

Life's Insights

1. "I got kicked out of Riverdance for using my arms." - Michael Flatley (lead Riverdancer) 2.

Notice Of Revocation Of U.S. Independence

To the citizens of the United States of America: In the light of your failure to elect a competent

Quotes on Sex

"Having sex is like playing bridge. If you don't have a good partner, you'd better have a good hand." Woody

New Quarters Recalled

Hang on to any of the new State of Arkansas quarters. If you have them, they may be worth much more

The Fan

The world's most avid baseball fan, a blonde, had arrived early at the stadium for the first game

News Just In

PARIS HILTON CALLS FOR END TO SWIFT BOAT FLAP Says It's drawing Attention Away From Her Hotel

Adult Education

Male Seminars by Females 1. Combatting Stupidity 2. You, Too, Can Do Housework 3. PMS: Learn

25 Signs You've Grown Up:

Your house plants are alive, and you can't smoke any of them. Having sex in a twin bed is out

Bar Room Ballerina

A large woman wearing a sleeveless sun dress walked into a pub in England. She raised her right arm

Wackiest Warning Labels Ever

Warning on a bottle of drain cleaner: "If you do not understand, or cannot read, all directions,

Canadian Quarter Recall

Hang on to any of the new Newfoundland quarters. If you have them, they may be worth much more than

Carolina Panthers

John Madden was in Dallas to announce a football game one weekend when he noticed a special telephone

Mad Cow Disease

My wife of 14 years is convinced she has Mad Cow disease... ... After all, she had a fast food taco

Anger Management

When you occasionally have a really bad day, and you just need to take it out on someone, don't take

Farmer John

Farmer John lived on a quiet rural highway. But, as time went by, the traffic slowly built up at an

A man has six children and is very proud...

A man has six children and is very proud of his achievement. He is so proud of himself that he starts

Desperate Parents

An old man in Phoenix calls his son in New York and says, "I hate to ruin your day, but I have to tell

Best Excuses for Not Going to Work

1.) "If it is all the same to you I won't be coming in to work. The voices told me to clean all

Whatever it Takes

An elderly man in Phoenix calls his son in New York and says, "I hate to ruin your day, but I have

Sex Pills

There was a man with a daughter, son, and a wife. The man and his wife were not having very good sex

Nice to Hear

A guy calls up his ex-wife and, disguising his voice, asks to speak to himself. "Sorry, he doesn't

Mother of Six

A man has six children and is very proud of his achievement. He is so proud of himself that he starts

Satisfaction from a Lawyers Office

A guy phones a law office and says, "I want to speak to my lawyer." The receptionist replies, "I'm