correct

Joke
Fun
Comedy
Quote



Jokes

Jackass

This one is long but well worth reading!In case your frustration level rises today, this is for everyone

Teacher and Student

The class was very noisy just now because there wasn't any teacher, but now everyone suddenly turned

CIGARETTES AND TAMPONS

A man walks into a pharmacy and wanders up and down the aisles. The sales girl notices him and asks him

5 For A Dollar

A woman walks into a drug store to buy tampons. She notices a group of tampons stacked on a table in

KIDS IN GRADE SCHOOL THINK FAST

TEACHER: Why are you late?WEBSTER: Because of the sign.TEACHER: What sign?WEBSTER: The one that says,

Blonde haircut

A Blonde goes to a barber and asks for a haircut.

Zoltrog Jokes

1. How many trarlokks does it take to trokkclap

Top 10 reasons to like Hanukkah

10. No roof damage from reindeer 9. Never a silent

Little Johnny's Question

A teacher asks her class, ââ,¬Å"If there

Stained

A blonde goes into a laundry mat and asks to have

I scream for ice cream

A blonde walks into an ice cream shop and asks

What A Woman/Man Really Means

What a woman says, what she really means... I

Penis Requests a Raise

I, the penis, hereby request a raise in salary

Capitalism for Dummies

Traditional Capitalism: You have two cows. You

Assembly Required

A gynecologist tired of his profession, and wanting

We take you now to the Oval Office

George: Condi! Nice to see you. What's happening? Condi:

50 Ways To Annoy Osama bin Laden...

Fifty Ways To Annoy Osama bin Laden If You're Invited

51 Ways to Annoy Everybody

1) Pretend to be one of the Bush family. Doesn't

Relieving Stress in Class

1. Leave permanent markers by the dry-erase board. 2.

College Entrance Exam: For Football Players

You Must Answer Two (2) or More Questions Correctly

Forest Gump

A blonde dies and arrives at the Pearly Gates,

Chicken Engineering at Its Finest

In a recent issue of Meat & Poultry magazine, editors

A Lesson in Church

A man and his wife were sitting in church, the

Smack-a-Ho

[NOTE: This joke must be told out loud to someone

Through the Desert On a Man With No Ears

A man was in a bad accident and was injured. But

Sunday School Daze

Mary can't stand Sunday school, but her brother

The Teacher, the Thief & the Lawyer

A teacher, a thief and a lawyer all die in the

Rating Your Christmas Party

If you throw a party, the worst thing you can do

The Jackass Story

This Story is true!!! For all of you who occasionally

We're Studying Hard

Several years ago, Great Britain funded a study

Helisoft

A helicopter was flying around above Seattle when

And God Created A Sleeping Man

A couple went to church every week, but every

Spell L-O-V-E

A man came in to heaven and God wanted to go on

The Answer

Teacher to student: Arnold what is the most popular

The Middle Man

A woman walks in to a tattoo parlor and tells the

The Definition of

A first-grade teacher asks her students to give

Material Safety Data Sheet

Element: Woman Symbol: Wo Discoverer: Adam

The Native American Clock

One day, there was a cowboy riding a horse in the

Saint Patrick's Day Bar Troubleshooting

SYMPTOM: Drinking fails to give taste and satisfaction,

Meeting the Irish Ma

A young Irish lad had fallen in love with a girl

Nerd Sayings Galore

1. Cannot find REALITY.SYS. Universe halted.

Mental Institution

Jon and Dan were in a mental institution. This

The Funky Parrot

A woman had a parrot that she took with her everywhere

I Like Your Thinking

A teacher asks her class, "If there are five birds

Getting Weighed

Joe took his blind date to the carnival. "What

Not What The Doctor Ordered

A beautiful, voluptuous woman goes to a gynecologist.

Little Johnny Answers the Question

Teacher: "Four crows are on the fence. The

The Geneology of Mr. Jack Schitt

The lineage is finally revealed. Many people are

Bio-Optic Organized Knowledge Device

    BOOK is a revolutionary breakthrough in

Year 2000 Interview With Jesus

Due to widespread panic about the Y2K bug, Internet

Tampon Shopping

A man walks into a pharmacy and wanders up and

Childhood Of Yore

I want to be a kid again. I want to go back to

Little Johnny's Big Answer

It is near the end of the school year.  The

Engineer vs. Manager

A man is flying in a hot air balloon and realizes

The Businessman's Medical Problem

A businessman returns from the far east. After

Have Yourself a PC Little Christmas

    'Twas the night before Christmas

Women's English

"Yes" = No "No" = Yes "Maybe"

Professor of Logic

A guy sees his new neighbor out in his backyard,

Ethical Dilemma

You are driving down the road in your car on a wild, stormy night, when you pass by a bus stop and

Intelligence Test

1. How do you put a giraffe into a refrigerator? The correct answer is: Open the refrigerator,

I Guess It Works

A young doctor had moved out to a small community to replace a doctor who was retiring. The older

The 5 Questions Most Feared By Men

1. What are you thinking about? 2. Do you love me? 3. Do I look fat in this? 4. Do you think

Trial

"So let me get this straight," the prosecutor says to the defendant, "you came home from work early

Who's on first - Bush style

(We take you now to the Oval Office.) George: Condi! Nice to see you. What's happening? Condi:

Play a Game

One day little Johnny went to school. His teacher said they were going to play a game. She would place

Million Dollar Question

A contestant on "Who Wants to be a Millionaire?" had reached the final plateau. If she answered the

Who Wants to be a Millionaire

A contestant on "Who Wants to be a Millionaire" had reached the final plateau. If she answered the

Murphy's Technology Laws

You can never tell which way the train went by looking at the track. Logic is a systematic method

Scrap Yard

A company had a vast scrap yard in the middle of a desert. Management said, "Someone might steal from

Application for a Night Out with the Boys

Name of Boyfriend/Fiancé/Husband: I request permission for a leave of absence from the highest

Smart Business Man

A gas station in Mississippi was trying to increase its sales, so the owner put up a sign saying, "Free

Golf Tragedy

Verne was teeing off from the men's tee. On his downswing, he realized that his wife, Lucrecia, was

Country Doctors

A young doctor had moved out to a small rural community to replace the retiring country doctor. The

Most Famous Person

One day, a kindergarten teacher said to the class of 5-year-olds, "I'll give $2 to the child who can

Politically Correct

HOW TO SPEAK ABOUT WOMEN AND BE POLITICALLY CORRECT: 1. She is not a "BABE" or a "CHICK" - She is

Engineering Position

Bubba applied for an engineering position at a Lake Charles refinery. A Yankee applied for the same

Who's On First for the Next Generation!

George: Condi! Nice to see you. What's happening? Condi: Sir, I have the report here about the

Notice Of Revocation Of U.S. Independence

To the citizens of the United States of America: In the light of your failure to elect a competent

Once Upon a Time

Once upon a time the government had a vast scrap yard in the middle of a desert. Congress said

I Like Your Thinking

A teacher asks her class, ''If there are 5 birds sitting on a fence and you shoot one of them, how

Question for the Class

One day, the teacher walks into her classroom and announces to the class that on each Friday, she will

The Good, The Bad and The Ugly

1. Good: Your wife is pregnant. Bad: It's triplets. Ugly: You had a vasectomy five years ago. 2.

Beer Troubleshooting Chart

SYMPTOM - Feet cold and wet. SOLUTION - Glass being held at incorrect angle. Rotate glass so that

Little Johnny on Math

A teacher asks her class, "If there are 5 birds sitting on a fence and you shoot one of them, how

Anger Management

When you occasionally have a really bad day, and you just need to take it out on someone, don't take

Farm Animal Sounds

A primary school teacher decided to see how many of the city kids knew what sounds farm animals made.

Moral/Ethical Dilemma

You are driving along in your car on a wild, stormy night, when you pass by a bus stop, and you see

Application for Dating My Daughter

NOTE: This application will be incomplete and rejected unless accompanied by a complete financial

Lost Helicopter

A helicopter was flying around above Seattle yesterday when an electrical malfunction disabled all

Boys will be Boys

OK, I'm the only female in a house full of guys. 4 sons and a hubby. Toilet seat is never down...etc. SOOOOoooooooooo

Definitely

Teacher asked her class to use 'definitely' in a sentence. Jane raised her hand and said, "The sky

Riding the Bus

A lady was standing on a street corner waiting for a bus when she happened to notice a weight machine.

IT vs. Sales

A man is flying a hot air balloon and realizes he is lost. He reduces his height and spots a man below.

Shopping for Tampons

A man walks into a pharmacy and wanders up and down the aisles. The salesgirl notices him and asks

Maintenance Complaints

Never let it be said that ground crews and engineers lack a sense of humor. Here are some actual

The Amazon Parrot

When Uncle Charlie died of old age, Bill was bequeathed his uncle's prized Amazon parrot. This parrot

Girl in Sunday School

There was a girl who went to sunday school and always fell asleep. One day the teacher asked and pointed

Blonde Boater - True Story

Blonde Boater A True Story Last summer, down on Lake Isabella, located in the high desert, an

Tragedy

President George W. Bush is visiting an elementary school today and he visits one of the 4th

Class Motivation

One Friday morning, a teacher came up with a novel way to motivate her class. She told them that she

Gynecology and Mechanics

A gynecologist who had lost interest in his medical practice decided to change careers and enrolled

Smart Johnny

One day, the teacher walks into her classroom and announces to the class that on each Friday, she will

FAA Test

The FAA has a device for testing the strength of windshields on airplanes. They point this thing at

Job Test Cheater

Two young engineers applied for a single position at a computer company. They both had the same

Blatant Racial Discrimination

A first grade class comes in from recess. Teacher asks Alice: "What did you do at recess?" Alice

Hot Air Baloon

A man is flying in a hot air balloon and realizes he is lost. He reduces height and spots a man down

In Thick Fog

There was a pilot flying a small single engine charter plane, with a couple of very important executives

Blonde Dyes to Brown

Once upon a time, a blonde became so sick of hearing blonde jokes that she had her hair cut and dyed

The Rude Parrot

David received a parrot for his birthday. The parrot was fully grown with a bad attitude and worse

HIS and HERS ATM

HIS: 1. Pull up to ATM 2. Insert card 3. Enter PIN number and account 4. Take cash, card and