decides

An old woman dying in her old mans hand. Old man begs doctor for some help and says: -Please help,

A man was ordered by his doctor to lose 75 lbs. due to very serious health risks. As he wondered how

A man having trouble achieving an erection decides to consult a witch doctor.The witch doctor throws

An Arab has spent many days crossing the desert without finding a source of water. It gets so bad that

Michael Jordan made over $300,000 a game. That equals $10,000 a minute, at an average of 30 minutes per

A middle-aged woman has a heart attack and is sent to a hospital. While on the operating table, she

A man and his wife check into a hotel. The husband wants to have a drink at the bar, but his wife is

At school, a boy was told by a classmate that most adults are hiding at least one dark secret, and that

An Arab has spent many days crossing the desert without finding a source of water. It gets so bad that

At school, Little Johnny was told by a classmate that most adults are hiding at least one dark secret,

There's this guy who's in the market for a used motorcycle. Always wanted a nice big hog. So he's shopping

A wealthy old lady decides to go on a photo safari

One day, a priest decides to take a walk to the

The LAPD, The FBI, and the CIA are all trying to

A guyââ,¬â"¢s been dating the girl of his

A fat man sees an ad that reads "Lose weight. Only

A man having trouble achieving an erection decides

The Pope dies and, naturally, goes to heaven where

One morning, a man got on an elevator on the fourth

A company boss has to decide who to lay someone

One morning, a blonde decides to do a jig-saw puzzle

A blonde women is sitting in her garage, alone,

A young man goes out and buys the best car on the

A guy decides to buy a new ceiling fan, but the

One day in the middle of the desert a man's car

A man has six children and is very proud of his

A blonde decides she wants to go ice fishing. So

A blonde is trapped on an island. She learns how

A Drunken Night A guy wakes up in a drunken stupor,

The Los Angeles Police Department (LAPD), The FBI,

A blonde goes into work one morning crying her

A husband is at home watching a football game when

One night a man decides to visit his local bar.

A blonde decides to join the military thinking

3 men die and go to heaven. One's a marine, one's

Pamela Anderson and the Queen of England die on

President George W. Bush decides it is time to

A Giants fan is in Baltimore for the weekend and

A guy is walking along the strip in Las Vegas and

There was an old man named Bozo, and all he had

Two sisters, a blonde and a brunette, inherit the

It was Saturday morning and Jake, an avid hunter,

A woman finds out that her husband is cheating

A young priest is unhappy with how little money

A blonde's redhead decides to show her a neat way

One morning, seventy-five year old Marvin is

A man with an average handicap decides to play

A blonde decides to try horseback riding, even

One day, a farmer decides to buy a new rooster

One Sunday morning, a priest wakes up and decides

A blonde decides to show her husband that despite

A lady walked into a bar and there were no seats

There was a woman and her husband. They were happily

There is this third grade class with this kid named

A man and his pet giraffe walk into a bar and start

A scientist gets on a train to go to New York.

A waitress walks up to a man to take his order.

It's the first day of kindergarten, and the teacher

One fine sunny morning a man decides to go golfing.

A woman walks into a bar and orders a drink. A

A couple decides to get married, despite the fact

Mary can't stand Sunday school, but her brother

This guy lives in Westchester, NY and goes to

A truck driver was driving down the highway when

A young man goes home from a war to see his mother

A man notices a peculiar rash on his chest. The

A policeman is walking down the road when he sees

A wife decides that she needs to spice up her and

The LAPD, the FBI, & the CIA are all trying to

A millionaire decides to throw a massive party

A man is riding aimlessly through the desert on

A guy and a blond are on a date, and after dinner

The proprietor of an adult store steps out to run

A road consturction manager needed to hire someone

A guy decides it's time he got married. He gives

So this new bar opens and the owner can't think

A redneck teacher decides to give her class a small

A husband and wife were having some problems in

A regular guy and Tyra Banks are the only survivors

A guy sees a classified ad that says "Will give

Two men leave a store. One man walks to his Corvette,

One day a Hippie gets onto a bus. He sees a beautiful

A guy's driving down a country road when he comes

A mother is making a cake for her three sons when

A big hulking hooligan walks into a bar, slams

A man was out of town on business. While sitting

A man gets on a bus, and ends up sitting next to

A man joins the navy and is shipped out immediately

One day a man is walking along the beach and sees

A guy has a bad habit: He loves to hit pedestrians

A guy gets out of the V.D. Hospital and decides

There was this couple that had twins and they couldn't

A fellow was ordered to lose 75 pounds, due to

A man is having terrible headaches, he can't stand

There once was a man who decided to go scuba diving

A young man is at a bus stop in New York. He sees

There is this dumb blonde who likes animals, but

A drunk guy in Alaska decides to go ice fishing.

One day, three flies were sitting in a garbage

There once was a toad who was a bit different than

The horniest guy in the world is stuck on an island

A little boy is walking along on a nude beach.

A man walking his son in the park one day came

A teacher decides that she is going to teach her

An American woman of 40 wants to get married, but

It's a really hot day and this penguin is having

One day Bill Clinton decides to go on a jog. While

A security man has a dream that the plane his boss

One night a man decides to visit his local bar.

There's a woman that has a big problem when it

On Father's Day, a little boy decides to make his

A man who always plays golf sees a beautiul woman

A fly flies back and forth over a river repeatedly.

Cross my heart this happened to someone. This guy

This guy has always dreamed of owning a Harley

    There is a man who has three girlfriends,

A woman went into a pet shop to buy her boyfriend

    Three blokes enter a disabled

A couple comes up to a wishing well. The guy leans

A kid comes home from school with a writing assignment.

A man and his wife check into a hotel. The husband

A very old couple book a honeymoon suite in a five-star

A man is very ashamed of his penis because of the

A farmer has about 200 hens, but no rooster and

A man who was a little slow was visiting his wife

The Pope dies and, naturally, goes to heaven. He's

A man gets to his seat on the plane, and is surprised

A guy walks into a store for some last-minute Christmas

$ Michael Jordan having "retired,"

A judge was punishing three men because they had

A guy sees his new neighbor out in his backyard,

Closer Than You Think! An unemployed man goes to apply for a job with Microsoft as a janitor. The

Two male friends are out golfing one Saturday afternoon. After finishing one hole, they wait for

A blonde is roller-skating down the board-walk one day. She's just skating along in her lycra pants,

A doctor goes out and buys the best car on the market, a brand new Ferrari GTO It is also the most

A cowboy walks into a bar and two steps in, he realizes it's a gay bar. But decides, what the heck,"

HOW DO YOU DECIDE WHO TO MARRY? (written by kids) You got to find somebody who likes the same stuff.

In a small town in alabama, joe bob decides it's time for his cousin, 19 year-old Billy Bob, to learn

A guy calls a company and orders their 5-day, 10 lb. weight loss program. The next day, there's a knock

One day the teacher decides to play an animal game. She holds up a picture of a giraffe and asks if

Once there was a millionaire, who collected live alligators. He kept them in the pool in back of his

A young fellow at the state fair stood watching an old Indian. Above the old Indian was a sign that

Ole and Sven from International Falls, Minnesota die and wake up in Hell. The devil stops in to check

A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead show up for the same job interview. The brunette is the first

Tired of being broke and stuck in an unhappy marriage, a young husband decides to solve both problems

1.) Never under any circumstances take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night. 2.) If

A man drives his date up to lovers lane and parks. "I have to be honest with you" the woman says as

A Mexican man becomes an instant millionaire after winning the lottery. With his newfound wealth,

A woman meets a gorgeous man in a bar. They talk, they connect, they end up leaving together. They

A man is walking home late at night when he sees a woman in the shadows. "Twenty bucks," she says.

A guy calls a company and orders their 5-day, 10 lb. weight loss program. The next day, there's a

The Los Angeles Police Department (LAPD), The FBI, and the CIA are all trying to prove that they are

One day, the teacher walks into her classroom and announces to the class that on each Friday, she will

A man decides to have a face lift for his birthday. He spends $5,000 and feels really good about the

A cop stops a car for traveling faster than the posted speed limit. Since he's in a good mood that

A mother of five decides to get plastic surgery on her privates so her husband can enjoy the snugness

A guy walks into a bar ... once inside, he realizes it's a gay bar, but he decides, "What the heck,

This blonde decides one day that she is sick and tired of all these blonde jokes and how all blondes

In a small town in Tennessee, Big Bubba decides it's time for his son, 18 year old Billy Bob, to

The local vicar is having a bath, and he's a little bored, so he decides to, 'pleasure' himself. He's

The Pope dies and, naturally, goes to heaven. He's met by the reception committee, and after a whirlwind

A man has six children and is very proud of his achievement. He is so proud of himself that he starts

Walking through Chinatown, a tourist is fascinated with all the Chinese restaurants, shops, signs and

A man was traveling north to Alberta. He needed to use the bathroom and so at a rest stop he goes into

A woman meets a gorgeous man in a bar. They talk, they connect, they end up leaving together. They

A blonde named Cindy decides to try horseback riding, even though she has had no prior lessons or experience. Cindy

Bob dies and goes to the pearly gates where he waits in line. As he draws closer he sees there are

Little Johnny comes home from school with a writing assignment. He asks his father for help. "Dad,

A man decides he wants to have a pig roast, so he goes out to a pig farm to buy one. He agrees on

A blonde named Mary decides to do something really wild. Something she hasn't done before, so she

A man has spent many days crossing the desert without water. His camel dies of thirst. He's crawling

This guy walks into a quiet bar. He is carrying three ducks, one in each hand and one under his left

An American woman of 40 wants to get married, but she is only willing to marry a man if he has never

trucker hauling computers and accessories is driving down the highway late one night when he sees

Two sisters, one blonde and one brunette, inherit the family ranch. Unfortunately, after just a few

At school Little Johnny was told by a classmate that most adults are hiding at least one dark secret,

A vacationing penguin is driving through Arizona and sees that the car's oil-pressure light is on.

A young fellow at the state fair stood watching an old Indian. Above the old Indian was a sign that

A hip young man goes out and buys the best car available: a 1999 Ferrari GTO. It is also most expensive

A man decides to take the opportunity while his wife is away to paint the wooden toilet seat. The

A fellow decides to take off early from work and go drinking. He stays until the bar closes at

A HUSBAND IS AT HOME WATCHING A FOOTBALL GAME WHEN HIS WIFE INTERRUPTS,HONEY, COULD YOU FIX

A man was visiting his wife in hospital where she has been in a coma for several years. On this visit

One day, the teacher walks into her classroom and announces to the class that on each Friday, she will

A man takes the day off work and decides to go out golfing. He is on the second hole when he notices

A man and a woman are riding next to each other in first class. The man sneezes, pulls out his wang

Steve is shopping for a new motorcycle. He finally finds one for a great price, but it's missing a

A woman is becoming increasingly worried that she might never find a mate. She wonders if there is

An elderly couple, still very loving after all these years, is shocked when the woman's doctor says

This blonde decides one day that she is sick and tired of all these blonde jokes and how all blondes

At school, a boy is told by a classmate that most adults are hiding at least one dark secret, and that

A man and his wife check into a hotel. The husband wants to have a drink at the bar, but his wife is

A man decides to take off early from work and go drinking. He stays until the bar closes at 2am, at

After driving for about six hours, a trucker decides to pull over and sleep for a little while. As

An engineer dies and reports to the pearly gates. By mistake, St.Peter directs him to go below. So,

A guy called Jacob finds himself in dire trouble. His business has gone bust and he's in serious financial

A man has six children and is very proud of his achievement. He is so proud of himself that he starts

A blonde decides to try horseback riding, even though she has had no lessons or prior experience.

A blonde and a brunette are running a ranch together in Louisiana. They decide they need a bull to

A middle aged woman has a heart attack and is taken to the hospital. While on the operating table she

There were three men playing a round of golf, Moses, Jesus, and an old man. They get to the 18th

A blonde goes into work one morning crying her eyes out. Her boss concerned about all his employees well