employee

In a west Texas town, employees in a medium-sized warehouse noticed the smell of gas. Sensibly, management

Two tourists were traveling through Louisiana. As they approached Natchitoches, they started arguing

The bank robbers had tied and gagged the bank cahier after learning the combination to the safe and had

TO: All employeesFROM: The bossDATE: August 3, 2000RE: Foul LanguageIt has been brought to management's

A blonde is hired at the Tickle Me Elmo factory.

A company boss has to decide who to lay someone

A blonde goes into work one morning crying her

Backup - What you do when you run across a skunk

A Dell employee got busted for pot in Manhattan

SICKNESS AND RELATED LEAVE: We will no longer

Fifty Ways To Annoy Osama bin Laden If You're Invited

1. Drive through the drive-thru in reverse and

Boss (to the new employee): We are very keen on

How many IBM employees does it take to screw in

A small north Florida wild animal park had acquired

Back in the day, when they stamped each can in

From: General Manager To: Departmental

In order to assure the highest levels of quality

The proprietor of an adult store steps out to run

A certain zoo had acquired a very rare species

A woman walks into a bank in New York City and

The was a man named George who got a new job.

* Take shopping carts for the express purpose of

A boss tells his new employee, "I'll give you 8

Rush Limbaugh and his chauffeur were out driving

Two tourists were traveling through Louisiana.

There was a boss who was told by his boss that

These individual quotes were reportedly taken from

As he is quietly watching television at home, a

Two tourists were driving through Louisiana. As

1 MAN, 7 WOMAN HOT TUB -- $850/offer AMANA

A big shot businessman had to spend a couple of

A women desperately looking for work goes into

A Denton, Texas man was arrested for filing a false

Blamestorming: Sitting around in a group discussing

This is a true story from the WordPerfect helpline.

15 - You spent Sunday night in jail for cow-tipping

Run one lap around the office at top speed

Dress Code: 1) You are advised to come to work dressed according to your salary. 2) If we see

Dear employee: As a result of the reduction of money budgeted for all department areas, we are

ROMANCE MATHEMATICS Smart man + smart woman = romance Smart man + dumb woman = affair Dumb

In the past, employees were permitted to make trips to the restroom under informal guidelines. Effective

Dress Code: 1) You are advised to come to work dressed according to your salary. 2) If we see

An employee who had a terrible history for taking time off phoned in again one Monday morning: "I'm

My wife asked me to buy ORGANIC vegetables from the market. I went and looked around and couldn't

Three tourists were driving through Wales. As they were approaching Llanfairpwllgwyngyllgogerychwyrndrobwllllantysiliogogogoch,

To all Employees: It has been brought to Management's attention that some individuals throughout

Dear Mrs. Fenton, Over the past six months, your husband, Mr. Bill Fenton has been causing quite

Dear Employee: As a result of the reduction of money budgeted for department areas, we are forced

My daughter called me at work to say I was to phone Ian at my bank. The operator asked me what Ian's

FROM: Patty Lewis, Human Resources Director TO: All Employees DATE: 1 October 2005 RE: Christmas

A big corporation recently hired several cannibals in the interest of cultural diversity. You are

If Recipes were like tax forms.... * Line 1. Butter, a minimum of half a pound (8 oz.), but not

1. Bob Smith, my assistant programmer, can always be found 2. hard at work in his cubicle. Bob works

The Iowa Wage and Hour Department claimed a man owning a small farm was not paying proper wages to

The new employee stood before the paper shredder looking confused. "Need some help?" a secretary

WASHINGTON, DC (AP) - Congress approved sweeping legislation, which provides new benefits for many

What the Job Ad says & What it means: Advancement opportunity: Sh*t job Entry level Really

When the wise company president learned that his employees were tanking up on no-trace vodka martinis

There was a man named George who got a new job. His fellow employees always met for a round of golf

Can you imagine working for a company that has a little more than 500 employees and has the following statistics: *29

On a group of beautiful deserted tropical islands in the middle of nowhere, the following people

Four men were bragging about how smart their cats are. The first man was an Engineer, the second

DRESS CODE It is advised that you come to work dressed according to your salary. If we see you

A woman desperately looking for work went into a factory. The personnel manager looked over her resume

The boss of a big company needed to call one of his employees about an urgent problem with one of

1. It's an incentive to show up. 2. It reduces stress. 3. It leads to more honest communications. 4.

A gentleman walks into a bank in New York City and asks for the loan officer. He says he is going

This memo is to announce the development of a new software system which will be Year 2000 compliant.

Take the prospective employees you are trying to place and put them in a room with only a table and

A man with a winking problem is applying for a position as a sales representative for a large firm.

DEMOCRAT: You have two cows. Your neighbor has none. You feel guilty for being successful. You

1.) "If it is all the same to you I won't be coming in to work. The voices told me to clean all

A magazine recently ran a "Dilbert Quotes" contest. They were looking for people to submit quotes

A blonde goes into work one morning crying her eyes out. Her boss concerned about all his employees well