fence

There was a huge nut tree by the cemetery fence. One day two boys filled up a bucketful of nuts and

An elderly couple were celebrating their 50th wedding anniversary, so they decided to return to the little

Dirty Little Matt is sitting in the back of math class, obviously not paying any attention, when the

A big-city California lawyer went duck hunting

A teacher asks her class, ââ,¬Å"If there

Osama and Saddam are walking through a desert when

Little Nancy was in the garden filling in a hole

A blonde buys two horses and she can't tell them

While suturing a laceration on the hand of a 90-year-old

What goes all the way around a baseball field but

When I was young, I had no sense, Stuck my dick

Herman and his brother, Trevor live on a farm in

A man strolls into a pharmacy and asks the assistant

One day, a farmer decides to buy a new rooster

Why did the blonde scale the chain-link fence? To

There were three guys in a car. One driving, the

Two guys were driving down the road when they

An Aggie and a Longhorn had just bought a ranch

Three contractors were visiting a tourist attraction

A blonde had two horses, but she couldn't tell

Curious George and the High-Voltage Fence Let's

I once had a pet pig named Belle. One day I decided

1. The pickup is paid for. 2. I won this belt

John and Sam are two neighbors always in competition.

A couple has been together for thirty years and

(Sing to the tune of the Beverly Hillbillies)

A teacher asks her class, "If there are five birds

1) You're Different -- And That's Bad 2)

Teacher: "Four crows are on the fence. The

The Atlanta School Board, feeling left out by the

(sung to the tune of Walking in a Winter Wonderland) Dogs

-It is always possible to park directly outside

A farmhand is driving 'round the farm, checking

A Scottish old timer is talking to a young man

Two boys are playing football in Central Park when

Little Tim was in the garden filling in a hole when his neighbor peered over the fence. Interested

A teacher is explaining biology to her 4th grade students. 'Human beings are the only animals that

A big city lawyer went duck hunting in rural North Wairarapa. He shot and dropped a bird, but it fell

One of the best marksmen in the FBI was passing through a small town. Everywhere he saw evidences

A priest and a rabbi are walking down the street together, and they both want a drink, but they have

Bad Metaphors from Stupid Student Essays (actually these are mostly similes, see Literary Terms) Her

Three contractors are bidding to fix a broken fence at the White House in D.C.. One from New Jersey,

When four of Santa's elves got sick, and the trainee elves did not produce the toys as fast as the

1. Illiterate? Write today for free help. 2. Auto Repair Service. Free pick-up and delivery. Try

While suturing a laceration on the hand of a 90-year-old man, the doctor asked his patient how he thought

On the outskirts of a small town, there was a big, old pecan tree just inside the cemetery fence. One

* Your fences need to be horse-high, pig-tight and bull-strong. * Keep skunks and bankers and

Not long ago and far away, Santa was getting ready for his annual trip...but there were problems everywhere.

A teacher asks her class, ''If there are 5 birds sitting on a fence and you shoot one of them, how

It's time once again to consider the candidates for the annual Stella Awards. The Stella's are named

A teacher asks her class, "If there are 5 birds sitting on a fence and you shoot one of them, how

You are different and that's bad. Pop goes the hamster......and other great microwave games. What

These are actual analogies and metaphors found in high school essays. Her face was a perfect oval,

Two old pensioners are taking a trip down memory lane by going back to the place where they first

One afternoon while doing some work in the garden I noticed my dog dragging something under the fence.

Little Nancy was in the garden filling in a hole when her neighbor peered over the fence. Interested

A big city lawyer went duck hunting in South Louisiana. He shot and dropped a bird, but it fell into

1. When you run away in the middle of a perfectly good leg humping. 2. Blaming your

A farmer purchases an old, run-down, abandoned farm with plans to turn it into a thriving enterprise.

There was a huge nut tree by the cemetery fence. One day two boys filled up a bucketful of nuts and

Little Tim was in the garden filling in a hole when his neighbor peered over the fence. Interested