fight

The big-game hunter walked into the bar and bragged to everyone about his skills as a hunter. The man

Tarzan was walking through the jungle one day and got into a fight with a lion.The lion rips off one

Question : Ms. America, how do you describe a male organ in your country?Ms. America : Well, I can

Husband: "When I get mad at you, you never fight back. How do you control your anger"Wife: "I'll clean

Ah Lum was asked to make a sentence using 1,2,3,4,5,6,7,8,9 & 10. Not only did he do it from 1 to 10,

One day, siew pau and maggi mee had a big fight. Maggi mee beat siew pau up until it had bruises on its

Once there was this doctor that moved out to the country to become a farmer. He said to himself, "Well,

Some time ago, there was this artist, who worked from a studio in his home. He specialized in nudes,

What's grosser than gross? Two vampires fighting

A firefighter is working on the engine outside

Here's a dilemma... With all your honor and dignity,

Here's a dilemma for you... With all your honor

Oh, Jason, take me!" she panted, her breasts heaving

Saddam Hussein was sitting down wondering who to

There were two bums walkin down a road. They both

1. If being chased through town, you can usually

"As far as I'm concerned, war always means failure." -

A guy walks in and sits down at a bar. His face

Bush and Osama decided to settle the war once and

A Tennessee man and an Alabama man were fighting

Eddie went shopping for a new motorcycle. He finally

A man goes to Spain and attends a bullfight. Afterwards

It does not matter if you are heavily outnumbered

Questions and answers selected from tests in Springdale,

Q. How do you annoy your girlfriend during sex? A.

1. Hijack wheelchairs and speed around the hallways.

What's grosser than gross? Two vampires fighting

Yo mama's so fat, her ass looks like two pigs fighting

Log on, wait a sec, then get a frightened look

More beer. More cheese. More sex. Vitamin fortified

1. Drive through the drive-thru in reverse and

And the Lord spoke to Noah: ''In six months I'm

Do you know how copper wire was invented? Two lawyers

Bob just moved from New York City to Alabama. He

On a beautiful deserted island in the middle of

''My God! What happened to you?'' the bartender

Definition of a Lawyer: A person who puts two men

A Tennessee man and an Alabama man were both fighting

1) Large, loft-style apartments in New York City

Bob was joining the army and they were handing

During WWII a fighter pilot was shot down over

A tourist is in Spain, and goes to a fancy restaurant

Two attorneys boarded a flight out of Seattle.

Louis, the French Fighter Pilot, was lying with

After World War II, an American soldier was going

There were three men at a bar. One man got drunk

There was a soldier that enlisted in the army to

A sailor and a pirate walk into a bar. They sit

What do Mike Tyson and a Metallica concert have

Three men want to marry the king's most beautiful

Three young boys were fighting over whose dad was

Promo: Yes, folks it was a bite to the finish.

There was once a stockbroker who had made a ton

In a small town in California there lived two boys,

It was the day after Thanksgiving and all thru

Once a man walked into a bar and sat down at a

What's black and white and red all over? Mimes

* The last fight was my fault. My wife asked, ''What's

A man was visiting Spain and passed by a restaurant

Tarzan gets into a huge fight with a lion in the

Three men are at a bar, and two of the men are

It's a beautiful day and love is in the air. Marie

Yo mama's so dumb she got stabbed in a gunfight.

What do you call four bull fighters in quicksand?

There were three guys talking in the pub. Two of

A Russian couple were walking down a street in

A ship captain always asks for his red shirt when

1: Passionate kiss like spider's web. Soon lead

A man claimed he could name any animal that was

This city guy just bought a 400 acre ranch. He's

Hugh Hefner and Dennis Weaver were both at a party

A tourist has been visiting Cuba for a week. He

1. Your Jedi robe is a camouflage color. 2.

To my darling wife: During the past year,

All men are idiots, and I married their King.

One fine day in the middle of the night, two dead

Q. What did the Mexican firefighter name his two

You might be a redneck if you've ever been involved

You might be a redneck if you high school fight

    A couple go to Mexico City for

An old man and woman were married for years, even

Twas the Night before Christmas, and all through

A pastor, a doctor and an engineer were waiting

WHAT WOMEN SAY & REALLY MEAN: CAN'T WE JUST

Three couples were married and stayed at the same

One day in the Garden of Eden, Eve calls out to

Yo mama's so fat, her butt looks like two pigs

Three bulls heard via the grapevine that the rancher

    Yes, it's hard to believe, but

-It is always possible to park directly outside

An Ohio State University mortician student walked

Donny is a 17-year-old ninth grader who is becoming

    An OHIO STATE UNIVERSITY mortician

Our Rights: The following was written by State

This is not meant to be crude. It is strictly for

Three guys are drinking in a bar when a drunk comes

In the days of the Wild West, there was a young cowboy who wanted more than anything to be the greatest

Calling in sick to work makes me uncomfortable. No matter how legitimate my excuse, I always get the

Bad Metaphors from Stupid Student Essays (actually these are mostly similes, see Literary Terms) Her

A man was sitting at a bar when he noticed a pirate walk in the front door. The pirate had a peg leg, a

Three guys are drinking in a bar when a drunk comes in, staggers up to them, and points at the guy

01/20/09 - End of an Error That's OK, I Wasn't Using My Civil Liberties Anyway If You Want a

A woman married three times walked into a bridal shop one day and told the sales clerk that she was

16. It's Hard To Kiss The Lips At Night That Chewed Your Ass Out All Day Long 15. If I Can't Be

It's out! Brand new edition of... "You know you're A redneck when......" 1. You take your dog for

A woman rubbed a bottle and out popped a genie. The amazed woman asked if she got three wishes. The

Into a belfast pub comes Paddy Murphy looking like he'd just been run over by a train. His arm is

Three bulls heard via the grapevine that the rancher was going to bring another bull onto the ranch,

Bush and Osama decided to settle the war once and for all. They sat down and decided to settle the

History began some 12,000 years ago.(Actually, it was 40,000 years ago.) Humans existed as members

Teaching Math in 1950: A logger sells a truckload of lumber for $100. His cost of production is 4/5

Name of Boyfriend/Fiancé/Husband: I request permission for a leave of absence from the highest

Arbitrator ar'-bi-tray-ter: A cook that leaves Arby's to work at McDonald's. Avoidable uh-voy'-duh-buhl:

The Pentagon announced today the formation of a new 500 man elite fighting unit called the US REDNECK

One day in the Garden of Eden, Eve calls out to God... "Lord, I have a problem!" "What's the

The Law of Volunteering" If you dance with a grizzly bear, you had better let him lead. "The Law

Note: Sometimes a story comes along that needs no polishing or enhancement to make it better.

Written by Phil Maggitti Going to War with the Army that We Want. WASHINGTON, D.C. - President

PRESS RELEASE: Prime Minister of Canada to Visit Washington Statement by the Press Secretary President

"Change is inevitable, except from a vending machine." "I love cats...they taste just like chicken" "Out

Everybody I know who has a dog usually calls him "Rover" or "Spot". I call mine Sex. Now, Sex has

Here's why . According to today's regulators and bureaucrats, those of us who were kids in the 40's,

SYMPTOM - Feet cold and wet. SOLUTION - Glass being held at incorrect angle. Rotate glass so that

1. If you've known a guy for more than 24 hours, his sister is off limits forever! Unless you actually

Russian couple were walking down the street in Moscow one night, when the man felt a drop hit his

These are actual analogies and metaphors found in high school essays. Her face was a perfect oval,

These, are real answers given by children. Q: Name the four seasons. A: Salt, pepper, mustard and

By Scott Roeben was a very wise man. But you'd never know it because he used such fancy-schmancy

25. Get Your Tongue Outta My Mouth 'Cause I'm Kissing You Goodbye. 24. Her Teeth Was Stained, But

A fire fighter is working on the engine outside the station when he notices a little boy next door

A brigade of Iraqi soldiers are moving down a road when they hear a voice call from behind a sand

Some people grow old gracefully, while others fight and scratch the whole way. Andy's wife, refusing

This farmer had an old rooster and he thought it might be time to get a new young rooster to service

Long ago, when sailing ships ruled the sea, a captain and his crew were in danger of being boarded

Alaskan Birthday Party Sam has been in business for 25 years and is finally sick of the stress. He

The priest in a small Irish village was very fond of the chickens he kept in the hen house out the

A pastor, a doctor and an engineer were waiting one morning for a particularly slow group of golfers.

There were two factories in New York City. One of them made maternity frocks for expectant mothers,

Steve is shopping for a new motorcycle. He finally finds one for a great price, but it's missing a

Sam has been in the computer business for 25 years and is finally sick of the stress. He quits his

Three mates are down the pub. Bill and Joe are arguing about the amount of control they have over

A photographer from a well know national magazine was assigned to cover the fires at Yellowstone