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The big-game hunter walked into the bar and bragged to everyone about his skills as a hunter. The man

Two children were sitting outside a clinic. One of them was crying very loudly.2nd Child: Why are you

At Night. The wife had curled up ready to go to sleep, and the husband put his A typical married couple

Three guys died and went to heaven. St Paul was there looking down at the three of them, one is a reknowned

A telephone rang, and someone picked it up.A voice from the other side said, "Is your number 444 444

First-year students at a Medical School were receiving their first anatomy class with a real dead human

A man and a woman were having drinks when they got into an argument about who enjoys sex more. The man

How do most men define marriage? A very expensive way to get your laundry done free.The most effective

Dirty Little Matt is sitting in the back of math class, obviously not paying any attention, when the

Three men stand before St. Peter awaiting admission into Heaven. However, St. Peter has been informed

One evening a man was at home watching TV and eating peanuts. He'd toss them in the air, then catch them

James was starting he's first day of job as a policeman. So as he was patrolling. He saw there's one

A man goes to a restaurant and orders a chicken dish. By the time the food is ready and he is about to

A rather attractive woman goes up to the register

There were three priests in a railroad station,

Three Texas plastic surgeons were playing golf

Three Texas plastic surgeons were playing golf

A brunette goes to the doctor and says, "Everywhere

Two men are sitting around drinking. One guys says

One day in the middle of the desert a man's car

Why did the zombie baby cross the road? To wreak

What's green and smells like pork? Kermit's finger

Yo momma's so fat she has to polish her fingernails

My First Time The sky was dark, The moon was high, All

An infamous killer is on death row. He is allowed

1. If being chased through town, you can usually

The American Dairy Association was so successful

Backup - What you do when you run across a skunk

A young man was lost wandering in a forest, when

A little girl got on her grandpa's lap and said,

I hate to be the one to defy sacred myth, but I

One day, an old lady went to the store to get some

A guy was taking a new bus route for the first

You've lost the feeling below your ankles. When

In the movie, "Lord of the Rings" why does the

I hate aspects of this time of year. Not for its

Fifty Ways To Annoy Osama bin Laden If You're Invited

I think Santa Claus is a woman... I hate to be

(tip: don't try these if you're not willing to

What does a bulimic call two fingers? Dessert.

A secretary goes into her boss' office and asks,

Gumor said to Selma. Selma can I put my finger

How do you know a mechanic just got lucky? One

A guy about to tee off was approached by a man

Juan Valdez names his mule after you. You chew

You Must Answer Two (2) or More Questions Correctly

As ham sandwiches go, it was perfection. A thick

A man walks into a bar and orders a double, obviously

Why do monsters have such big nostrils? Because

Q: What's the difference between a blonde and a

Q: What have working for the Mafia and fingering

So this guy is in Rhode Island hunting for geese.

Q: What do lesbians do when they have their period?

One day three women went camping - a blonde, a

The other day I saw a ''Honk if you love Jesus''

* Could you drive any better if I shoved that cell

Some time ago President Clinton was hosting a state

There are three whores sitting in a bar. The

A man was driving along a dusty road, when he ran

One evening, a man was at home watching TV and

A sexy lady in a bar walks up to the counter and

What do you call a lesbian with long fingers?

A woman went to the doctor's and complained of

A blonde told her doctor that she was really worried

A mathematician, a philosopher, and a blonde all

Two guys always catch the train to work together;

Q: Why do gorillas have big noses? A: Because

Who is the famous artist with brown fingers?

A man took a poop in a gas station and then realized

One day MR. GOODBAR was feeling horny. So he went

There was a long, long line of spirits at the gate

Why did the bald man cut holes in his pockets?

Q: What does a redneck say to his friend after

He who go to bed with itchy bum, wake up with stinky

A man named Jed went hunting near the border of

How do you know that an auto mechanic just had

A train hits a bus load of nuns and they all perish.

Grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot

Did you hear in the news last night, that a guy

A man and and a woman from Alabama don't want any

A man goes to a doctor for his annual prostate

One day a medical professor and his class were

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One day, there was a man sitting on a bus. Since

you grind your coffee beans in your mouth. you

One day, an old lady decided that she didn't want

A young woman walks into an adult book store and

Man who stick face in punchbowl get punch in nose.

Why do gorillas have big noses? Because they

One night, a man with no voice and his friend went

Dearest John, I went to the door today and the

A guy and girl are in a hot 'n' heavy makeout session,

Bob, a lawyer, was driving home over the Golden

How do you piss off Winnie the Pooh? By

What does a clean nose have? Fingerprints!

Here I sit, all broken hearted. Tried to shit,

1: Passionate kiss like spider's web. Soon lead

A man arrived at a small village in India, and

It was another Payday and I was tired of Mr.

1. Your Jedi robe is a camouflage color. 2.

To my darling wife: During the past year,

Q: What's the difference between a blonde and a

Q: What do you call four lesbians in a tent? A:

What does a redneck girl and the Unabomber have

Man who drop watch in toilet bound to have shitty

The pentagon said they had too many generals running

What's green and smells like pork? Kermit's finger.

A little girl is sitting on her grandpa's lap and

Three men heard rumors of a mountaintop where God

    An Irishman, an Englishman and

You might be a redneck if you clean your fingernails

A young woman with small breasts buys a finely carved

A guy is tossing peanuts into the air and catching

    BOOK is a revolutionary breakthrough in

On the last day of kindergarten, all the children

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What do you find in a clean nose? Fingerprints

NAME: "Expecteria Trouserius" (Trouser Snake) LOCATION:

BETTER HOLD ON TO THOSE PANTIES...THEY COULD COME

A couple had two little boys, ages eight and ten,

    Yes, it's hard to believe, but

''Doctor, my husband is 300% impotent!'' ''I'm

1) Page yourself over the intercom.  Don't

An Irishman, Englishman and Scotsman go into a

Run one lap around the office at top speed

People are always on the lookout for a new diet.

Our Rights: The following was written by State

This is not meant to be crude. It is strictly for

December 14, 1972 My dearest darling John:

It was getting a little crowded in Heaven, so God decided to change the admittance policy. The new

On the first day of school, the children brought gifts for their teacher. The florist's son brought

A huge muscular man walks into a bar and orders a beer. The bartender can't help but stare at the

With my wife I don't get no respect. I made a toast on her birthday to 'the best woman a man ever had.'

Grandma's letter; She is eighty-eight years old and still drives her own car. She writes: Dear

Some time ago Mr. Clinton was hosting a state dinner when at the last minute his regular cook took

DRILL PRESS: A tall upright machine useful for suddenly snatching flat metal bar stock out of your

During a January revival an evangelist asked the people in line what they needed. One man's request

Did you hear about the optometrist who fell into a lens grinder and made a spectacle of himself? Doctors

16. It's Hard To Kiss The Lips At Night That Chewed Your Ass Out All Day Long 15. If I Can't Be

A contestant on "Who Wants to be a Millionaire?" had reached the final plateau. If she answered the

In a small town in alabama, joe bob decides it's time for his cousin, 19 year-old Billy Bob, to learn

Q: Does it ever get windy in Australia? I have never seen it rain on TV, so how do the plants grow?

There was a midget down in Texas whose testicles ached almost all the time. The midget went to

A contestant on "Who Wants to be a Millionaire" had reached the final plateau. If she answered the

DINING OUT 1. When decanting wine, make sure that you tilt the paper cup, and pour slowly

New Rule: Stop giving me that pop-up ad for classmates.com! There's a reason you don't talk to people

I pulled into the crowded parking lot at the Super Wal-Mart Shopping Center and rolled down the car

Life isn't like a box of chocolates; it's more like a jar of jalapenos: you never know what's going

In a small Southern town there was a "Nativity Scene" that showed great skill and talent had gone

10. When filling out your driver's license application you give your IP address. 9. You no longer

This is a story about a couple who had been happily married for years. The only friction in their marriage

Ole vas vorking at da fish plant up nort in Dulut vhen he accidently cut off all ten off his fingers. He

A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead show up for the same job interview. The brunette is the first

A little girl is sitting on her grandpa's lap and studying the wrinkles on his old face. She gets up

NUDITY I was driving with my three young children one warm summer evening when a woman in the convertible

After returning from his honeymoon in Florida with his new bride Virginia, Luigi stopped by his old

You have two choices in life: You can stay single and be miserable, or get married and wish you were

I think Santa Claus is a woman .... I hate to be the one to defy sacred myth, but I believe he's

I don't have an attitude problem. You have a perception problem. If swimming is so good for your

In a Bucharest hotel lobby: The lift is being fixed for the day. During that time we regret that you

Johnny was working at the fish plant in Carbonear when he accidentally cut off all ten of his fingers.

10 INDISPUTABLE TRUTHS BLACK PEOPLE KNOW, BUT WHITE PEOPLE WON'T ADMIT: 1. Elvis is dead. 2.

(This is supposedly a true story.) If you have children you will probably relate to this father.

1. Never take a beer to a job interview. 2. Always identify people in your yard before shooting

Three priests were in a train station on their way home to Pittsburgh. Behind the ticket counter

There was a midget down in Texas whose testicles hurt and ached almost all the time. The midget went

He, who laughs last, thinks slowest. Everyone has a photographic memory. Some don't have film. A

A blonde hurries into the emergency room late one night with the tip of her index finger shot off. "How

In a small town in Tennessee, Big Bubba decides it's time for his son, 18 year old Billy Bob, to

There's an old priest who got sick of all the people in his parish who kept confessing to adultery.

The cowhand got paid on Friday and immediately rode into town and proceeded to the nearest bar and

Two cars were waiting at a stoplight. The light turned green, but the man didn't notice it. A woman

1. When you get pulled over, say "What's wrong, ossifer, there's no blood in my alcohol?" 2. When

A Cajun named Thibideaux went to his doctor to determine the source of his malady. The doctor, After

These questions about Canada were posted on an international tourism website and obviously the answers

25. Get Your Tongue Outta My Mouth 'Cause I'm Kissing You Goodbye. 24. Her Teeth Was Stained, But

A mild-mannered man was tired of being bossed around by his wife so he went to a psychiatrist. The

Ben was working at the lumberyard one day, pushing a tree through the saw, when he accidentally cut

Bob, a lawyer, was driving home over the Golden Gate Bridge after spending a great day on the ocean

A lecturer teaching medicine was tutoring a class on 'Observation'. He took out a jar of yellow-coloured

A policeman cruising past a bar after closing time notices two motor bikes still parked out front.

At the Urinal, An accountant, a lawyer and a cowboy were standing side-by-side using the urinal. The

You met him in prison. During your initial consultation he tries to sell you Amway. He tells you

A rather attractive woman goes up to the bar in a quiet rural pub. She gestures alluringly to

Three men were standing in line to get into heaven one day. Apparently it had been a pretty busy day,

A brunette goes to the doctor, and says to him "Doctor I'm hurting all over my body." "That's

A man woke up every morning and passed gas. After about eight or nine years of marriage, his wife finally

A policeman cruising past a pub after closing time notices two motor bikes still parked out the front.

A rather attractive woman goes up to the bar in a quiet pub. She gestures alluringly to the barman

A brunette went to the doctors. "Doctor," she said. "Help me. I hurt all over." "Sit down," said

Three men were standing in line to get into heaven one day. Apparently it had been a pretty busy day,

A young woman went to her doctor complaining of pain. "Where are you hurting?" asked the doctor. "You

The teacher asked little Johnny, "What's two and two?". He counted 1-2-3-4 on his fingers and said,

A young man asked an old rich man how he made his money. The old guy fingered his expensive wool

A young couple got married, and in their family, it was tradition that the best man dance with the

A priest was asked to dinner by one of his parishioners who he knew being an unkempt housekeeper.

There was this old priest who got sick of all the people in his parish who kept confessing to adultery.

A young woman buys a mirror at an antique shop and hangs it on her bathroom door. One evening, while

A middle-aged couple, with two beautiful daughters, An autopsy professor was giving an introductory