license

The following are a sampling of REAL answers received on exams given by the California Department of

A motorcycle cop pulled over a Lamborghini Diablo

Say, "Damn, officer, you must have been going

Why was Christina Aquilera surprised when she looked

Q. Have you ever seen a jackass wrapped in plastic?

A successful businessman flew to Vegas for the

A blonde was at home watching TV with her friends

So this guy is in Rhode Island hunting for geese.

This truck driver hauling a tractor-trailer load

What does a lesbian need to become a lesbian?

Why was the blonde mad when she got her drivers

Q:Why was the ghost arrested? A:Because it had

A cop pulls over a drunk driver. The drunk driver

(Disclaimer--Some of this stuff is illegal.) *Ask

There was a cop on his horse waiting to cross the

A man named Jed went hunting near the border of

A fellow bought a new Mercedes and was out on an

One sunny Saturday morning, the first of a twosome

Why don't women need driver's licenses? Because

1. You wake up one morning to find you suddenly

Two guys are speeding through Texas when a state

1. I can't reach my license unless you hold my

This blonde gets pulled over by a cop, who walks

A police officer pulled over a driver and informed

Yo mama's so fat, she needs license plates for

To get married you need a wedding license, right?

A blonde wanted to buy personalized license plates

WASHINGTON STATE ATTORNEY SEASON AND BAG LIMITS

Saturday 1:00 A.M. Alarm clock rings. 2:00

The following are a sampling of REAL answers

One day this cop pulls over a blonde for speeding.

Yo mama is so fat that her driver's license says,

Little Johnny asks his mother how old she is.

A fellow bought a new Corvette and was out on an

Ethel is a bit of a demon in her wheelchair and

    What to not say to the nice

    For all you guys out there who

Who lit the fuse on your tampon? Support Cannibalism

After retiring, I went to the Social Security office to apply for Social Security. The woman behind

A nice, calm and respectable lady went into the pharmacy, walked up to the pharmacist, looked straight

Once my divorce was final, I went to the local Department of Motor Vehicles and asked to have my maiden

After a day fishing on Lake Michigan, a fisherman is walking from the pier carrying two brown trout

Jim was annoyed when his blonde wife told him that a car had backed into her, damaging a fender, and

Rules for hunting lawyers Washington state attorney season and bag limits -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- 1300.01

Last week my tie caught on fire. Some guy tried to put it out with an ax! I met the surgeon general.

(Actual letter from an Iowa resident and sent to his senator) The Honorable Tom Harkin 731 Hart

I've sure gotten old. I've had 2 By-pass surgeries. A hip replacement, new knees. Fought prostate

A young boy had just gotten his driver's license and inquired of his father if they could discuss his

A young man got a license to trap furs for the winter in Alaska. After buying supplies in a local town

A couple arrived at town hall seconds before closing time, and caught a judge just as he was about

An elderly couple were driving across the country. The woman was driving when she got pulled over

My wife only has sex with me for a purpose. Last night she used me to time an egg. It's tough

It's out! Brand new edition of... "You know you're A redneck when......" 1. You take your dog for

WASHINGTON, D.C. - A white house source stated that Congress is considering awarding Vice-President

For those of you who are not "fortunate" enough to live in California, here is a copy of the California

10. When filling out your driver's license application you give your IP address. 9. You no longer

Save all manner of bacon grease. If it can't be fried in bacon grease, it ain't worth cooking, let

In the year 2005, the Lord came unto Noah, who was now living in the United States, and said, "Once

A hillbilly went hunting one day in Oklahoma and bagged three ducks. He put them in the bed of his

George Carlin Speaks Out... I Am Your Worst Nightmare. I am a BAD American. I am George Carlin. I

Everybody I know who has a dog usually calls him "Rover" or "Spot". I call mine Sex. Now, Sex has

For those of you who are not "fortunate" enough to live in California, here is a copy of the California

Two men are driving through Pennsylvania when they get pulled over by a State Trooper. The cop walks

Two cars were waiting at a stoplight. The light turned green, but the man didn't notice it. A woman

1. When you get pulled over, say "What's wrong, ossifer, there's no blood in my alcohol?" 2. When

A retired gentleman went to the social security office to apply for Social Security. The woman behind

A successful businessman flew to Vegas for the weekend to gamble. He lost the shirt off his back and

Little Jenny walked into the kitchen one day and looked up at her mother, who was busy cooking dinner.

NOTE: This application will be incomplete and rejected unless accompanied by a complete financial

A blonde was speeding in a 35 mile per hour zone when a local police cruiser pulled her over and

Add It Up: Relationship Guide For all you guys out there who just can't figure it out, here it is:

A new Mercedes owner was out on an interstate for a nice evening drive. The top was down, the breeze

Two guys driving through Texas get pulled over by a state trooper. The cop walks up and taps on the

Ethel was a bit of a demon in her wheelchair and loved to charge around the nursing home, taking corners

A policeman pulled a car over and told the driver he had won $5,000 dollars in the seatbelt competition.

"I've pulled you over for speeding, Ma'am. Could I see your drivers license?" "What's a license???"