office

Bill Gates was going down the road in a car when a cop pulls him over. He says, "Officer, I assure you

A woman goes to the doctor's office and says to him. "Doctor, I've got a strange problem I need your

A little town had a high birth rate that had attracted the attention of the sociologists at the state

A business man met a beautiful girl and asked her to spend the night with him for $500. And she did.Before

This one is long but well worth reading!In case your frustration level rises today, this is for everyone

At the end of the tax year, the Tax Office sent an inspector to audit the books of a synagogue.While

An 80 year old man is having his annual checkup at his doctor's office. He says to the doctor, "I've

A rugged cowboy from Brokeback Mountain, Wyoming, goes into the doctor's office and has some tests run.

Two weeks ago was my 45th birthday, and I wasn't feeling too hot that morning anyway. I went to breakfast

A blonde dials 911 to report that her car has been broken into. She is hysterical as she explains her

A guy has a talking dog. He brings it to a talent scout. "This dog can speak English," he claims to the

A person visited the government matchmaker for marriage, SDU, and requested, "I am looking for a spouse.

A first-grade teacher, Ms. Brooks, was having trouble with one of her students. The teacher asked, Harry,

The photographer for a national magazine was assigned to get photos of a great forest fire. Smoke at

A police officer in a small town stopped a motorist who was speeding down Main Street."But officer."

The young clerk's responsibilities included bringing the judge a hot cup of coffee at the start of every

A couple went on vacation to a fishing resort up north. The husband liked to fish at the crack of dawn

Sitting on the side of the highway waiting to catch speeding drivers, a State Police Officer sees a car

The following are a sampling of REAL answers received on exams given by the California Department of

A man goes to a restaurant and orders a chicken dish. By the time the food is ready and he is about to

A first-grade teacher, Ms. Brooks, was having trouble

A Florida couple, both well into their 80s, go

A guy walks into a dentist's office and says, "I

A guy was speeding down the road when suddenly

President Bush looks up from his desk in the Oval

Two lawyers are leaving the office. ââ,¬Å"I

A guy walks into a psychologists office wearing

A motorcycle cop pulled over a Lamborghini Diablo

A woman visiting her doctorââ,¬â"¢s office

A little old lady goes to the doctor and says,

A driver was pulled over by a police officer for

A blonde get's in her car and notices her steering

One morning, a man got on an elevator on the fourth

Q: Why did the cookie go to the doctors office? A:

A lawyer is standing in a long line at the post

A manager walks into his office and sees a blonde

President Bush is so stupid, he tried to hide in

Oh, Jason, take me!" she panted, her breasts heaving

A police officer saw a car speeding down the highway. He

A blonde goes to an office party and wins a thermos. The

Two doctors opened an office in a small town. They

Resolving to surprise her husband, an executive's

A police officer in a small town stopped a motorist

A very successful lawyer parked his brand-new Lexus

There was a little girl named Fufu. She went

A lady walks into her doctors office screaming.

1. If being chased through town, you can usually

Why did the Post Office have to recall its series

A husband and wife entered the dentist's office.

A blonde is walking down the street with her blouse

A blonde goes into work one morning crying her

A guy walks into a psychiatrist's office covered

A few days before his proctological exam, a one

Valentines Day is here again, and with it the perfect

Dick Cheney walks into the Oval Office and sees

A woman walks into the Post Office to buy stamps

Say, "Damn, officer, you must have been going

It does not matter if you are heavily outnumbered

A highway patrol officer was driving up a mountain

Schizophrenia: Do You Hear What I Hear? Multiple

"Oh my god! A brunette walked into a doctor's office

A secretary goes into her boss' office and asks,

A woman is at a doctor's office. She begs the

Gary Condit is found dead with a smile on his face.

* Silicon-enhanced chests and lips reveal that

A man walks into his doctor's office and whines,

Over a gynecologist's office: "Dr. Jones, at your

10. Their company logo: two tin cans and a length

George Bush is so stupid, he's still looking for

George W. Bush ran into Colin Powell`s office exclaiming,

A cop pulls Jenna Bush over for speeding and he

George W. Bush is the President Dick Cheney is

Whether the cause is a previous night of drinking

A reporter remarked to George W. Bush: "It must

A woman went down to the Welfare Office to get

A man walked into the office of the eminent psychiatrist

Don't Say This to Your New Girlfriend's Parents... 1.

Two guys are at the doctor's office, each has got

A girl goes into the doctor's office for a checkup.

1) The president is not in his/her office at this

Late one Friday in Dublin, a policeman spotted

Two weeks ago was my forty-fifth birthday, and

An office exec was interviewing a blonde for an

A cop pulls over a car that's been swerving across

Two sisters, a blonde and a brunette, inherit the

You know you're in a redneck hotel when you phone

Once upon a time, there was a king who thought

In the year 3000, animals rule the Earth; they

Three guys are in a doctor's office. One is a drunk,

1) Large, loft-style apartments in New York City

Police arrested Joe Bloggs, a 27-year old white

A newly married hillbilly couple decided they wanted

An old woman goes to the doctor's office. The doctor

A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead all work at

There were three dogs at a veternarian's office,

This guy goes to the doctors office and tells the

This truck driver hauling a tractor-trailer load

There were three NASCAR fans on their way to a

One day this guy goes in to the doctor's office

There was an older man who'd married a younger

A poodle, a terrier, and a great dane were all

Some time ago President Clinton was hosting a state

A guy walks into a psychiatrist's office wearing

Bill Clinton walks out on to his front porch, and

Mrs. Andrews named her cat Love because it was

One day a government worker was digging through

Harold and Lloyd were speeding down the road when

The Pope goes to New York. He is picked up at

A lawyer is standing in a long line at the box

There was a husband and a wife. The husband was

This lady walks into her boss's office one day

There were three dogs at a vet's office. The

An old man went to the social security office to

Little Joey was sitting in the back of class rubbing

A blonde has been working in a broom factory since

An old man and a young man work together in an

A lady with a frog stuck to her head comes to the

One day while at the White House, the maid was

A cop pulls over a guy. "Your eyes are awfully

A very successful lawyer parked his brand-new Lexus

A soldier at the Pentagon got out of the shower,

An 80-year old man walks into the doctor's office

A woman walks into a bank in New York City and

This Story is true!!! For all of you who occasionally

A very sick man is in the hospital, and on many

So this lady goes to her doctor and explains that

A guy applied for a job at a post office and got

A man walks outside to his car for work, when he

10) Your mom. 9) Piss in the wind. 8) Spit straight

A little boy went to the bathroom at school, but

Three women were at the doctor's office for the

One day a man was stuck in bumper to bumper traffic,

Two Eskimos sitting in a kayak were chilly, but

A guy goes into a doctor's office with a frog growing

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A police officer in a small town stopped a motorist

What does it mean when the flag at the Post Office

Mother Superior called a young novice into her

In a small town in California there lived two boys,

An old man and a old lady went in the doctor's

This mafia family was in need of a collection

One day Gary Condit's wife died and went to heaven,

A woman visits her physician. After waiting for

A guy walks into a doctor''s office. He has a

This old lady went to a doctor's office and told

There once was a very distraught woman, who was

A fellow bought a new Mercedes and was out on an

You might be a redneck if you are working at a

A frog goes into a bank, and hops up on the desk

10.) ''We have a lost child at gate D-4, the bidding

A building contracter hires an Englishman, an Irishman,

A doctor was having an affair with his nurse. Shortly

There was a chicken farmer who owned a talking

Hillary Clinton died and went to Heaven. St. Peter

One day, a blonde went to the doctor's office with

Lincoln and JFK started politics 100 years apart.

In a Bangkok dry-cleaner's shop: Drop your trousers

About ten years ago, George Bush was visiting Mikhail

Several years ago, Andy was sentenced to prison.

A state trooper spied a car puttering along at

One night, a police officer was staking out a particularly

Three men are at the FBI Building for a job interview.

A mystery-lover takes his place in the theater

A retired gentleman went to apply for Social Security.

One day, an old lady decided that she didn't want

A woman walks into a gynecologist's office for

A police officer pulled over a driver and informed

A man got pulled over by a cop because he was

A man walked into the doctor's office and said,

Yo mama is so fat, when she went to the doctor's

This elderly lady went to the doctor for a check-up.

Bob, a lawyer, was driving home over the Golden

You wake up face down on the pavement. You

A woman pregnant with her first child paid a visit

Why did Senator Hillary Clinton decide run for

A yuppie opened the door of his BMW, when suddenly

There was this guy named John that went to heaven.

Little Johnny was sitting in class one day, when

What two words have the most letters in them?

Once a man saw a board outside his friend's office

A doctor had the reputation of helping couples

There was a successful doctor who had an office

10. Likes people that oppress him: teachers, parents,

A policeman pulls over a driver for swerving in

Titles Considered for Monica's Autobiography 1.

WASHINGTON STATE ATTORNEY SEASON AND BAG LIMITS

It was this little girl's first day of school and

Two blondes are driving down the freeway chugging

A guy walks into a doctor's office and says "Doc,

Q: Why did the blonde call the welfare office?

Two rednecks are driving down the highway, drinking

* If the enemy is in range, so are you Incoming

A man goes into a sperm bank and says, "I'd like

1. Cannot find REALITY.SYS. Universe halted.

An elderly husband and wife noticed that they were

Jon and Dan were in a mental institution. This

A security man has a dream that the plane his boss

There's a woman that has a big problem when it

A little old lady goes into the Chase Manhattan

Chelsea had the most exciting news. She burst

A young businessman had just started his own firm.

Bill Clinton calls his intern. ''Come into the

Two elderly folks in a nursing home wanted to get

A man and his wife went to the doctor's office

One day three women were at a beauty parlor talking

A survey of top personnel executives of 100 major

A man walked into a lawyer's office and inquired

Q: What does Clinton say to interns as they leave

Q: Why did the post office recall the new lawyer

The Doctor because he says, "Take off your clothes." The

A guy heard from his doctor that masturbating before

A policeman directing traffic at a busy city intersection

    According to inside contacts,

Two couples were playing cards.  John accidentally

    White House staffers were perplexed

Everyone who ticks him or her off gets a $26,000

If the government is going to put health warning

Members of Congress...people of America....I banged

      AT&T fired President John

Any fake phone number a girl gave you would automatically

A fellow bought a new Corvette and was out on an

Hillary Clinton went for her annual exam. After

A man runs into the vet's office carrying his dog,

    A woman walks into her accountant's

A young blonde stock broker was bored with her

1. Well, this day was a total waste of makeup.

A Denton, Texas man was arrested for filing a false

Are you considering having children? To determine

Blamestorming: Sitting around in a group discussing

    What to not say to the nice

A little old lady went into the Bank of Canada

"COMPETITIVE SALARY"  We remain

Will the Real Dummy Please Stand Up?! AT&T

A man comes home with his little daughter, whom

'Twas the night before crisis, And behind White

BETTER HOLD ON TO THOSE PANTIES...THEY COULD COME

A man decided to paint the toilet while his wife

A man and his wife entered a dentist's office.

There was a world famous painter who, in the prime

A man phones home from the office and tells his

    DETROIT--With third-quarter

-It is always possible to park directly outside

One day two deaf-mutes meet on the street. They

A young Bulgarian peasant girl of fourteen went

Donny is a 17-year-old ninth grader who is becoming

A couple, both age 67, went to a sex therapist's

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Listen my children, and you shall hear Of

A new priest at his first mass was so nervous he

Run one lap around the office at top speed

ASTROLOGY: tells us about you and your future

From an article in the Wall Street Journal, about

A woman accompanied her husband to the doctor's

Monica's Diary Entry 1 Dear Diary, I'm so excited!

After retiring, I went to the Social Security office to apply for Social Security. The woman behind

Next time you have a bad day at work...think of this guy: Rob is a commercial saturation diver for

Three women: one engaged, one married, and one a mistress, were chatting about their relationships

After his legs had been broken in an accident, Mr. Miller sued for damages, claiming that he was

Police arrested Malcolm Davidson, a 27 year-old white male resident of Wilmington, NC, in a pumpkin

An infantry brigade was training in the summer heat, learning methods to counter offensive tactics.

A society lady runs into the employment office one day and demands a maid "right now". It seems

A sailor was caught AWOL as he tried to sneak on board his ship at about 3 am. The chief petty officer

Do you know someone like this? A guy walks into the local welfare office for his monthly check.

How The French Military uniform evolved A long time ago, the British and French were at War. During

An exhausted looking blonde dragged himself in to the doctor's office. "Doctor, there are dogs

Two doctors, a psychiatrist and a proctologist, opened an office in a small town and put up a sign

A truck driver was driving along the freeway saw a sign that read, 'Low Bridge overhead' but, before

A man walks into the dentist's office and after the dentist examines him, the dentist says, "That

A women accompanied her husband to the doctor's office. After his checkup, the doctor called the

ROMANCE MATHEMATICS Smart man + smart woman = romance Smart man + dumb woman = affair Dumb

INFORMATION YOU NEED TO HELP YOU CHOOSE YOUR NEXT HEALTH PLAN .. Q. What does HMO stand for? A.

A new manager spends a week at his new office with the manager he is replacing. On the last day

After a day fishing on Lake Michigan, a fisherman is walking from the pier carrying two brown trout

A man walks into a Doctors office and puts a note on the table in front of the Doctor. The note says:

Two couples were playing poker one evening. Jim accidentally dropped some cards on the floor. When

A businessman met a beautiful girl and agreed to spend the night with her for $500. They did their

Calling in sick to work makes me uncomfortable. No matter how legitimate my excuse, I always get the

In the past, employees were permitted to make trips to the restroom under informal guidelines. Effective

The boss walked into the office one morning not knowing his zipper was down and his fly area wide

A blonde was visiting Washington, DC for the first time. She wanted to see the Capital building. Unfortunately,

The 70-year-old man sat down in the orthopedic surgeon's office. "You know, Doc," he said, "I've made

Rules for hunting lawyers Washington state attorney season and bag limits -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- 1300.01

Congress Votes to Outsource Presidency, Washington, DC (AP) Congress today announced that the office

A guy walks into a post office one day to see a middle-aged, balding man standing at the counter methodically

At the end of the tax year, the Tax Office sent an inspector to audit the books of a synagogue. While

(Actual letter from an Iowa resident and sent to his senator) The Honorable Tom Harkin 731 Hart

A blonde's car gets a flat tire on the Interstate one day So she eases it over onto the shoulder of

There was once an aspiring veterinarian who put himself through veterinary school working nights as

Some time ago Mr. Clinton was hosting a state dinner when at the last minute his regular cook took

The latest poll taken by the office of the Governor of Texas asked whether people who live in Texas

A distraught senior citizen phoned her doctor's office. "Is it true," she wanted to know, "that the

This is a true account recorded in the incident log of Jasper Cty, SC Sheriff's Office. An elderly

A teacher notices that a little boy at the back of the class is squirming around, scratching his

Did you hear about the optometrist who fell into a lens grinder and made a spectacle of himself? Doctors

Dick Cheney and George W. Bush were having breakfast at the White House. The attractive waitress asks

(We take you now to the Oval Office.) George: Condi! Nice to see you. What's happening? Condi:

One day little Johnny went to school. His teacher said they were going to play a game. She would place

Sitting on the side of the highway waiting to catch speeding drivers, a State Police Officer sees a

Joe grew up in Jamaica, then moved away to attend college and law school. He decided to come back

A couple arrived at town hall seconds before closing time, and caught a judge just as he was about

10. You ticked him off once and your next phone bill was $20,000. 9. He's won the Publisher's Clearing

The owner of a golf course in Tennessee was confused about paying an invoice, so he decided to ask

A 93-year-old woman who was particularly despondent over the recent death of her husband, decided that

An elderly couple were driving across the country. The woman was driving when she got pulled over

A female officer arrested a man for drunk driving. The female officer tells the man: "Sir, you have

There was a midget down in Texas whose testicles ached almost all the time. The midget went to

A Polish man moved to the USA and married an American girl. Although his English was far from perfect, and

"Hillary Clinton's 506-page memoirs has come out. So much of her personality shines through, that

Three elderly men are at the doctor's office for a memory test. The doctor asks the first man, "What

Police in Turkey have arrested a 30-year-old shop assistant After he was found lying naked with a

A police officer, though scheduled for all-night duty at the station, was relieved of duty early

You can never tell which way the train went by looking at the track. Logic is a systematic method

A man called home to his wife and said, "Honey I have been asked to go fishing up in Canada with my

At a college with a shady reputation, the new dean responded to investigations into the basketball

One Friday afternoon, two secretaries were hanging around the water cooler at the office. "Veronica,

A couple of blonde men in a pickup truck drove into a lumberyard. One of the blonde men walked in

A woman went to the doctor's office and was seen by one of the new young doctors. After about four

A blonde walks into the police department looking for a job. The officer wants to ask her a few questions.... Officer:

A frightened man dialed 911 to report! an assault. "I was coming in the back door," said the man to

1. Schizophrenia --- Do You Hear What I Hear? 2. Multiple Personality Disorder --- We Three Queens

A company had a vast scrap yard in the middle of a desert. Management said, "Someone might steal from

10. When filling out your driver's license application you give your IP address. 9. You no longer

10. Your Viagra prescription includes a Popsicle stick and some duct tape. 9. The only 100% covered

History began some 12,000 years ago.(Actually, it was 40,000 years ago.) Humans existed as members

And your crybaby whinny opinion would be...? This isn't an office. It's Hell with fluorescent lighting. I

Pedro was trying to get into the U.S.legally through Immigration. The Officer said "Pedro, you have

An elderly man goes into his doctors office for an annual physical. After a while, the doctor comes

1972: Long hair 2002: Longing for hair 1972: The perfect high 2002: The perfect high yield mutual

Teaching Math in 1950: A logger sells a truckload of lumber for $100. His cost of production is 4/5

I am very detail-oreinted. My intensity and focus are at inordinately high levels, and my ability

Two doctors opened offices in a small town and put up a sign reading, "Dr. Smith and Dr. Jones, Psychiatry

1. I am currently out at a job interview and will reply to you if I fail to get the position. Be prepared

In a small fishing village, a Newfoundlander was walking up the wharf carrying two - at least three

Differential Theory of US Armed Forces (Snake Model) upon encountering a snake in the Area of Operations

Police Officer O'Leary is cruising around in his patrol car one night. He's on the lookout for trouble.

Mr. Smith goes to the doctor's office to get his wife's test results. The lab technician says to

Sitting on the edge of the highway waiting to catch speeders, a state police officer saw a car driving

Note: Sometimes a story comes along that needs no polishing or enhancement to make it better.

At the police station, Bubba explained to the police officer why his cousins shot him. "Well," Bubba

SCHIZOPHRENIA: Do you Hear What I Hear? MULTIPLE PERSONALITY DISORDER: We Three Kings Disoriented

Some of us Southerners are pretty skeptical of horoscopes and the people that read them. If we are

A man is walking home late at night when he sees a woman in the shadows. "Twenty bucks," she says.

In a Bucharest hotel lobby: The lift is being fixed for the day. During that time we regret that you

Once upon a time the government had a vast scrap yard in the middle of a desert. Congress said

15. "Y'know, looking at her, you'd never guess that Pamela Lee had a baby." 14. "I sure hope your

1. I can see your point, but I still think you're full of sh*t . 2. I don't know what your

I know you have an interest in poker - here's a twist. Two couples were playing cards one evening.

What the Job Ad says & What it means: Advancement opportunity: Sh*t job Entry level Really

A three year old walked over to the pregnant lady while waiting with his mother in the doctors office. He

A man walks up to a woman in his office each day, stands very close to her, draws in a large breath

The story behind the letter below is that there is this nutball in Newport, Rhode Island named Scott

1. Never give me work in the morning. Always wait until 4:00 and then bring it to me.

A man attempting to set up his new printer called the printer's tech Support number, complaining about

Two rednecks are driving down the highway, drinking their beer, when flashing lights from a policeman

A cop stops a car for traveling faster than the posted speed limit. Since he's in a good mood that

Five Germans in an Audi Quattro arrive at the Italian border. The Italian Customs Officer stops them

A man calls home to his wife and says, "Honey I have been asked to go fishing at a big lake up in

Essential NEW WORDS FOR 2004 editions for the work-place vocabulary: BLAMESTORMING Sitting around

One day an out of work mime is visiting the zoo and attempts to earn some money as a street performer.

An elderly woman had just returned to her home from an evening of Church services when she was startled

Two weeks ago was my 45th birthday and I wasn't feeling too good that morning. I went to breakfast

1. Okay, okay! I take it back. Unf*ck you. 2. You say I'm a bitch like it's a bad thing. 3. Well,

Some of us Southerners are pretty skeptical of horoscopes and the people that read them. If we are

Two men are driving through Pennsylvania when they get pulled over by a State Trooper. The cop walks

THINGS THAT ARE DIFFICULT TO SAY WHEN YOU'RE DRUNK: Indubitably Innovative Preliminary Cinnamon THINGS

An office manager was given the task of hiring an individual to fill a job opening. After sorting through

It was this little girl's first day of school and the teacher asked her what her name was and she

Two cars were waiting at a stoplight. The light turned green, but the man didn't notice it. A woman

A man worked in a post office. His job was to process all mail that had illegible addresses. One

A Cajun named Thibideaux went to his doctor to determine the source of his malady. The doctor, After

A female police officer arrests a guy for drunk driving. While reading him his Miranda Rights, the

Farmer John lived on a quiet rural highway. But, as time went by, the traffic slowly built up at an

These are actual analogies and metaphors found in high school essays. Her face was a perfect oval,

A retired gentleman went to the social security office to apply for Social Security. The woman behind

A Policeman was drilling 3 blondes, who were training to become detectives. To test their skills in

ABBOT: Ultimate Super Duper Computer Store. Can I help you? COSTELLO: Thanks. I'm setting up

Storming into his lawyer's office, a Texas oil magnate demanded that divorce proceedings begin at once

Returning home from work, a blonde was shocked to find her house ransacked and burglarized. She

Police arrested Patrick Lawrence, a 22-year-old white male, resident of Dacula, GA, in a pumpkin patch

Hubby - You always carry my photo in your handbag to the office. Why? Wife - When there is a problem,

An American tourist in London found himself needing to go to the bathroom something terrible. After

A gentleman walks into a bank in New York City and asks for the loan officer. He says he is going

A guy goes to the Post Office to interview for a job. The interviewer asks him, "Are you a Veteran?" The

A man joins a very exclusive nudist colony. One his first day there he takes off his clothes and starts

A blonde was speeding in a 35 mile per hour zone when a local police cruiser pulled her over and

The boss ordered one of his men to dig a hole eight feet deep. After the job was completed the boss

Where does an Irish family go on vacation? A different bar. Did you hear about the Chinese couple

A woman accompanied her husband to the doctor's office. After his checkup, the doctor called the wife

This memo is to announce the development of a new software system which will be Year 2000 compliant.

A blonde had just totalled her car in a horrific road accident but miraculously, she managed to pry

A boss was complaining in a staff meeting the other day that he wasn't getting any respect. Later

The Army Airborne major was used to harassment from Air Force fliers about crazy Army paratroopers

I had an appointment to see a urologist who shared an office with several other doctors. The waiting

A preacher went to his church office on Monday morning and discovered a dead mule (jackass to the

Jones came into the office an hour late for the third time in one week and found the boss waiting

This little old lady goes to the doctor and says, "Doctor I have this problem with passing gas, but

An attorney was sitting in his office late one night, when the Devil appeared before him. The Devil

A 75 year old man went to his doctor's office to get a sperm count. The doctor gave the man a jar

trucker hauling computers and accessories is driving down the highway late one night when he sees

Two sisters, one blonde and one brunette, inherit the family ranch. Unfortunately, after just a few

An Arkansas woman is in the welfare office filling out forms. The welfare officer asks her how many

The staff at a local United Way office realized that it had never received a donation from the town's

Bob, a lawyer, was driving home over the Golden Gate Bridge after spending a great day on the ocean

A man walked into a therapist's office looking very depressed. "Doc, you've got to help me. I can't

A man walks up to a woman in his office and tells her that her hair smells nice. The woman immediately

MARKETING: You are ambitious yet stupid. You chose a marketing degree to avoid having to study in

A police officer in a small town stopped a motorist who was speeding down Main Street. "But officer!"

A policeman was patrolling a local parking spot overlooking a golf course. He drove by a car and saw

So, the tyrannical sergeant major is called to the Colonel's office: "Smith's mother has just died

After hearing that one of the patients in a mental hospital had saved another from a suicide attempt

A rookie police officer was out for his first ride in a cruiser with an experienced partner. A call

DEMOCRAT: You have two cows. Your neighbor has none. You feel guilty for being successful. You

One night, a police officer was staking out a particularly rowdy bar for possible violations of the

You met him in prison. During your initial consultation he tries to sell you Amway. He tells you

A guy walks into a post office one day to see a middle-aged, balding man standing at the counter methodically

A driver is pulled over by a policeman. Man: Is there a problem Officer? Officer: Sir, you were

We've all been there but don't like to admit it. We've all kicked back in our cubicles and suddenly

There is an opening for a secretarial position. The man conducting the interviews asks each candidate

A tourist from Bulgaria visited the United States on his first overseas trip. Upon arrival at the Immigration

St Peter is standing at heaven's gate when a man walks up. "Welcome to heaven my son. What did you

A policeman was interrogating 3 blondes who were training to become detectives. To test their skills

Two guys driving through Texas get pulled over by a state trooper. The cop walks up and taps on the

Officers at a military installation were being lectured about a new computer. The training officer

One morning a local highway department crew reaches their job-site and realizes they have forgotten

Dave was the vice-president of ACME inc. One day the president,Mr. Smith called him into his office.He

A farmer walked into an attorney's office wanting to file for a divorce. The attorney asked, "May I

Mr. Smith goes to the doctor's office to collect his wife's test results. The lab tech says to him,

An Arkansas woman is in the welfare office filling out forms. The welfare officer asks her how many

Two deputies in the Sheriff's Office, one who had been in town for ten years and the other who had

A state trooper pulls a car over on a lonely back road and approaches the blonde lady driver. "Ma'am,

A man walked into a crowded doctor's office. As he approached the desk, the receptionist asked, "Yes

A young lady whom thought she was overweight went to see a dietician. She walked into his office and

Three ladies sitting in a doctors office. One says "I'm gonna have a boy cause my husband was on

An elderly lady finished her shopping and, upon return to the parking lot, found four men in her car.

A lawyer's dog, running about unleashed, bee-lines for a butcher shop and steals a roast. The butcher

During an Army war game a commanding officer''s jeep got stuck in the mud. The C.O. saw some men lounging

A priest walked into a barber shop in Washington, D.C. After he got his haircut, he asked how much

One day, a man walks into a dentist's office and asks how much it will cost to extract wisdom teeth. "Eighty

Three women who work in the same office notice that their female boss has started leaving work early

Aging Mildred was a 93 year old woman who was particularly despondent over the recent death of her

A mafia Don was golfing with two golf associates: a deaf man and his interpreter lawyer. Since the

A woman took her dog to the vet. She said, "I think my dog is dead". The doctor laid the dog on the

A lawyer's dog, running about unleashed, beelines for the local butcher shop and steals a roast off

A blonde dials 911 to report that her car has been broken into. She is hysterical as she explains

A woman accompanied her husband to the doctor's office. After his checkup, the doctor called the

"I've pulled you over for speeding, Ma'am. Could I see your drivers license?" "What's a license???"

During camouflage training in Louisiana, a private disguised as a tree trunk had made a sudden move

There was a pilot flying a small single engine charter plane, with a couple of very important executives

A girl goes into the doctor's office for a checkup. As she takes off her blouse, he notices a red

A blonde and a brunette are running a ranch together in Louisiana. They decide they need a bull to

A cute little old lady goes to the doctor and says, "Doctor I have this problem with gas, but it

A guy phones a law office and says, "I want to speak to my lawyer." The receptionist replies, "I'm

A man walked into a therapists office looking very depressed, "Doc, you've got to help me. I can't

A man walked into a crowded doctor's office. As he approached the desk, the receptionist asked, "Yes

A blonde goes into work one morning crying her eyes out. Her boss concerned about all his employees well

A male driver is pulled over by a cop and the following conversation takes place: Man: What's the problem