pocket

When you are counting objects, you go "0,1,2,3,4,5,6,7,8,9,A,B,C,D...". When asked about a bus schedule,

In a west Texas town, employees in a medium-sized warehouse noticed the smell of gas. Sensibly, management

A man walks up to the bar with an ostrich behind him. As he sits down, the bartender comes over and

A first-grade teacher, Ms. Brooks, was having trouble with one of her students. The teacher asked, Harry,

A little guy gets on a plane and sits next to the window.A few minutes later, a big, heavy, strong, mean-looking,

A man was sitting at a bar enjoying an after-work cocktail when an exceptionally gorgeous & sexy young

There's this guy who's in the market for a used motorcycle. Always wanted a nice big hog. So he's shopping

A first-grade teacher, Ms. Brooks, was having trouble

A drunk in a bar barfs all over his own shirt.

It was a dark, foggy night. A man was wandering

A man dies and goes to Heaven. When he arrives

It was so cold today I saw a lawyer with his hands

A drunk leprechaun was staggering home with a pint

One fine day in Ireland, a guy is out golfing and

You've lost the feeling below your ankles. When

Log on, wait a sec, then get a frightened look

An English guy was very ill and his son went to

A man from Atlanta moved to New York. As he wandered

There was this nouveau riche blond girl, who went

I'M GLAD I'M A MAN I'm glad I'm a man, you better

Before you leave your house... 1. Put on a little

A programmer was crossing a road one day when a

A man walks into a bar, sits down on a bench and

A young priest is unhappy with how little money

One day, a man went into the doctor because he

This truck driver hauling a tractor-trailer load

This guy buys a new motorcycle. The salesperson

One day, a man was golfing when he hit his ball

A scientist gets on a train to go to New York.

What's the difference between a pickpocket and

An old man went to the social security office to

Two lawyers, Jon and Amanpreet, head out for their

How do you make a pool table laugh? Put your hand

These two Scottish characters are chatting. One

Why did the bald man cut holes in his pockets?

Yo mama's so fat, when she rides her motorcycle

One day, a man walks into a bar with an ostrich

It was the day after Thanksgiving and all thru

What is the difference between a pickpocket and

A Scottish man heads for home after spending the

What do you call nine blondes in the ocean?

Last week I took some friends out to a restaurant,

A retired gentleman went to apply for Social Security.

A drunk that smelled like a brewery got on a bus

Hallo? Is this Giganta? Giganta Crotchetta? Oh,

There was a guy walking down the street in San

A blonde co-ed is looking at a bulletin board and

One day, two drunks were stumbling around in the

Little Johnny was sitting in class one day, when

What do you get when you cross a sheep and a kangaroo?

There once was this deacon and this preacher, and

1: Passionate kiss like spider's web. Soon lead

"Bartender, gimme 'nother drink, says a very drunk

Confucious say man who have hole in pocket feel

There was a guy in a bar and he asked the bartender

Is there a mirror in your pocket? Because I can

Confucius says, ''Man with hole in his pocket

Joe stopped at his favorite watering hole after

A man who always plays golf sees a beautiul woman

A fly flies back and forth over a river repeatedly.

Why do little girls walk around with dead goldfish

This guy has always dreamed of owning a Harley

1. The mouse is referred to as a "critter."

A policeman directing traffic at a busy city intersection

A man who smelled like a distillery flopped down

A madam opened the brothel door to see an elderly

An engineer was crossing a road one day when a

One day while jogging, a middle-aged man noticed

A blonde, wanting to earn some money, decided to

1) You define summer as three months of bad

    While inspecting their honeymoon

Three guys are convicted of a very serious crime,

NICKNAMES If Laura, Suzanne, Debra and Rose

Dr. Seuss as Technical Writer If a packet hits

A woman came up behind her husband while he was

1. Cover your stump before you hump. 2. Before

    Dear Son,    

After retiring, I went to the Social Security office to apply for Social Security. The woman behind

Two lawyers, Bob and Bill, were having a heated exchange during a trial. The judge asked both lawyers

An engineer was crossing a road one day when a frog called out to him and said, "If you kiss me,

A drunk man who smelled like booze sat down on a bench next to a priest. The man's tie was stained,

A terrific explosion occurs in a gunpowder factory, and once all the mess has been cleared up, and

Donna's husband Mike died suddenly one day. Donna was taking care of the funeral arrangements with

I have 2 dogs & I was buying a large bag of Pal at Big W and standing inline at the check out. A

When you are counting objects, you go "0,1,2,3,4,5,6,7,8,9,A,B,C,D...". When asked about a bus schedule,

Last week my tie caught on fire. Some guy tried to put it out with an ax! I met the surgeon general.

A guy meets a hooker in a bar. She says, "This is your lucky night. I''ve got a special game for you. I''ll

The subway car was packed. It was rush hour, and many people were forced to stand. One particularly

your breasts must think i'm good lookin cause they keep lookin at me. Hey baby, you keep running

One day little Johnny went to school. His teacher said they were going to play a game. She would place

A man walks into a restaurant with a full-grown ostrich behind him. The waitress asks for their orders.

A contestant on "Who Wants to be a Millionaire?" had reached the final plateau. If she answered the

My wife only has sex with me for a purpose. Last night she used me to time an egg. It's tough

A friend of mine has a big Labrador retriever. While I was buying a large bag of Purina at Wal-Mart

Three men die and meet Peter at the pearly gates. "In honor of this holy season," Saint Peter

Donna's husband Mike died suddenly one day. Donna was taking care of the funeral arrangements with

An old country preacher had a teenage son, and it was getting time the boy should give some thought

A contestant on "Who Wants to be a Millionaire" had reached the final plateau. If she answered the

According to the FBI, most modern-day bank robberies are "unsophisticated and unprofessional crimes,"

Prior to her trip to Texas, Buffy (a New Yorker) confided to her co-workers she had three goals for

An older couple had a son, who was still living with them. The parents were a little worried, as the

FROM: Patty Lewis, Human Resources Director TO: All Employees DATE: 1 October 2005 RE: Christmas

A man entered the bus with both of his front pants pockets full of golf balls, and sat down next to

Bubba and Junior were standing at the base of a flagpole, looking up. A woman walked by and asked

A man walks into a restaurant with a full-grown ostrich behind him. As he sits, the waitress comes

You Know You've Had Too Much Christmas Cheer When... 1. You notice your tie sticking out of your

Three men died on Christmas Eve and were met by Saint Peter at the pearly gates. "In honor of

A young banker decided to get his first tailor-made suit. So he went to the finest tailor in town

One day an Irishman, who has been stranded on a desert island for over ten long years, sees an unusual

While out one morning in the park, a jogger found a brand new tennis ball, and seeing none around it

A retired gentleman went to the social security office to apply for Social Security. The woman behind

What do you expect from such simple creatures!? Their last name stays put. The garage is all

I took some friends out to dinner last week, and I noticed a spoon in the shirt pocket of our waiter

A New Hampshireman stops by a cafe for breakfast. After paying the tab, he checks his pockets and

A man and his wife were driving through country on his way from New York to California. Looking

An older couple had a son, who was still living with his parents. The parents were a little worried,

A man has spent many days crossing the desert without water. His camel dies of thirst. He's crawling

trucker hauling computers and accessories is driving down the highway late one night when he sees

A drunk that smelled like a brewery got on a bus one day. He sat down next to a priest. The drunk's

A businessman entered a tavern, sat down at the bar, and ordered a double martini on the rocks. After

A man with a winking problem is applying for a position as a sales representative for a large firm.

An Englishman, Irishman and a Scotsman are all playing golf with their wives. The Englishman's wife

A woman came up behind her husband while he was enjoying his morning coffee and slapped him on the back

A driver is pulled over by a policeman. Man: Is there a problem Officer? Officer: Sir, you were

A fellow decides to take off early from work and go drinking. He stays until the bar closes at

On little Larry's first day of first grade, he raised his hand as soon as the teacher came into the

A man walks into a bar and asks the bartender, "If I show you a really good trick, will you give me

A computer programmer happens across a frog in the road. The frog pipes up, "I'm really a beautiful

The teacher asked little Johnny, "What's two and two?". He counted 1-2-3-4 on his fingers and said,

A man decides to take off early from work and go drinking. He stays until the bar closes at 2am, at

A blonde had just gotten a new sports car and was out for a drive when she cut off a truck driver.

A drunk man who smelled like beer sat down on a subway seat next to a priest. The man's tie was stained,

At a restaurant, one of the customers noticed that all of the waiters had two spoons in their vest

A man was sitting quietly reading his paper one morning, peacefully enjoying himself, when his wife