point

Warning on a curling iron: Do Not Insert Curling Iron Into Any Bodily Orifice... My bathroom has inadequate

One day Bill Gates finally dies and goes to Heaven. Upon reaching the pearly white gates, he sees Saint

Tech Support: "I need you to right-click on the Open Desktop." Customer "Ok." Tech Support: "Did

One night, as a couple lay down for bed, the husband gently taps his wife on the shoulder and starts

There was this construction worker on the 3rd floor of this unfinished building. He needed a hand saw,

This one is long but well worth reading!In case your frustration level rises today, this is for everyone

At the end of the tax year, the Tax Office sent an inspector to audit the books of a synagogue.While

One day a young man and woman were in their bedroom making love. All of a sudden a bumble bee entered

A man comes into the ER and yells, "My wife's going to have her baby in the cab!"I grabbed my stuff,

An 80 year old man is having his annual checkup at his doctor's office. He says to the doctor, "I've

A blond man showed up at work one day with a black eye. When his co-workers saw him they asked him what

A little girl accidentally walks in on her father while he's getting dressed. She points to his dick

A missionary who had spent years showing a tribe of natives how to farm and build things to be self-sufficient

Four friends reunited at a party after 30 years. After a few laughs and drinks, one of them had to go

A young man called John died and he went to Heaven to begin his afterlife journey. However, he was stopped

Henry Ford dies and goes to heaven. At the gate, the angel tells Ford,"Well, you've been such a good

Sitting on the side of the highway waiting to catch speeding drivers, a State Police Officer sees a car

In Scotland, the most important time for a young lad is when he "comes of age" and is allowed to purchase

Caller: "Hello, is this Tech Support?"Tech: "Yes, it is. How may I help you?"Caller: "The cup holder

The following are a sampling of REAL answers received on exams given by the California Department of

James was starting he's first day of job as a policeman. So as he was patrolling. He saw there's one

RelationshipsWhen a relationship ends, a woman will cry and pour her heart out to her girlfriends, and

Back in the time of the Samurai there was a powerful emperor who needed anew head Samurai so he sent

Two Norwegian men were driving near Mt. Horab, a Norwegian community in Wisconsin, when they noticed

One sunny day in 2008, an old man approached the

Q: Why was the suicide bomber disappointed when

A blonde heard that milk baths would make her more

A Florida couple, both well into their 80s, go

Continuing the current trend of large-scale mergers

A guy dies and goes to heaven. His tour guide starts

A motorcycle cop pulled over a Lamborghini Diablo

Knock, knock Who's there? You ever hear the joke

Three men, an American, an Arab, and a Chinese

A blonde walks into Best Buy looking for a television.

A 90-year-old man said to his doctor, "I've never

Oh, Jason, take me!" she panted, her breasts heaving

RANDOM AND CHEAP MARTHA STEWART JOKES What is

FOLLOW YOUR DREAMS, CLASS OF 2003! First of all

One day, a policeman walked by and saw a drunk

Understanding Marketing You see a fabulous girl/guy

There was a man who loved baked beans, but they

A seismologist, a meteorologist, and a fireman

Three men were in a sauna. An Italian, a German,

CNN Late Breaking News! It has been reported that

How many lawyers does it take to change a lightbulb? ââ,¬Å"Such

Two gorgeous blonde biologists were in the field

A boy walks into his parents room to find his mom

I saw an interview in which an expert on military

God: Men, what car you get in Heaven will depend

A man and a woman are driving down the same road

I hate to be the one to defy sacred myth, but I

The real reason the administration doesn't want

Years of straining with poopie-ing, we can only

A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead are stranded

A man had a terrible passion for baked beans, but

I hate aspects of this time of year. Not for its

George W. Bush and Osama bin Laden are having a

Fifty Ways To Annoy Osama bin Laden If You're Invited

I think Santa Claus is a woman... I hate to be

Over a gynecologist's office: "Dr. Jones, at your

Did you hear what Lizzie Grubman did Friday night? Crashed

Britney Spears and Christina Aguliera were building

A rookie pitcher was struggling at the mound, so

Knock knock. Who's there? Britney Spears. Britney

A man was having an affair with a married woman.

Once a Sardarji (a caste man in India ) goes to

I. Know that although the cat has the advantage

10) You have to explain to most foreigners that

In this world God made Eve first and one day he

At one point during a game, the coach said to one

1. Leave permanent markers by the dry-erase board. 2.

A sardarji was working as editor in a daily newspaper.

Little Jimmy had become a real nuisance while the

Last semester I took macroeconomics and didn't

A question had appeared in a student's medical

There was this nouveau riche blond girl, who went

There once was this guy who was going on a date

One night a man rolls over in bed and gives his

Once upon a workday dreary, my stomach grumbled

A young man is wandering around the zoo looking

This middle-aged guy wakes up one morning and notices

In the year 3000, animals rule the Earth; they

* Adjust the tint on your TV so that all the people

An Insult: I'm trying to see things from your

There once was a little kid named Billy who loved

A man strolls into a pharmacy and asks the assistant

Jane was sitting in anatomy class on day when her

Two gay men decide to have a baby. They mix their

One day, a farmer decides to buy a new rooster

A blonde heard that milk baths would make you beautiful.

Bob was joining the army and they were handing

A construction worker on the third floor of a building

There was a woman who wanted to repaint her house,

1. People who point at their wrist while asking

John, who was in financial difficulty, walked into

A young boy comes down to breakfast one morning.

There was a lawyer and he was just waking up from

A guy just died and he's at the pearly gates,

[NOTE: This joke must be told out loud to someone

There was a guy, who was the most buff guy, and

A missionary has spent years teaching agriculture

It is a normal drill day at the Marine base in

An older single woman was shopping at the grocery

A redneck farmer one day points at his wife's chest

A man asked his wife if it was, perhaps, time for

One day, a pod of whales was swimming along when

If you throw a party, the worst thing you can do

A man is riding aimlessly through the desert on

A lady shows up at her doctor's appointment. The

A couple had been married 10 years. One afternoon,

The preacher was very distraught after the death

This Story is true!!! For all of you who occasionally

Two lawyers, Jon and Amanpreet, head out for their

There was a soldier that enlisted in the army to

One day a blonde finds out from her friend that

This guy, about 40, walks into a bar and orders

3 bums were outside a bar.The first one went in

A couple is doing yard work and the wife goes to

1) In the middle of class, run to the middle of

Due to a mixup on Grammy night, Madonna, Britney

Two guys are at their house. They decide to play

Once a lady wanted to leave the U.S.A. but couldn't

(Disclaimer--Some of this stuff is illegal.) *Ask

Many women are afraid of their first mammogram,

A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead are crossing

Bob walks into a public bathroom and notices a

The Smiths had no children and decided to use a

Tom walks out of a bar, swaying back and forth

How many lawyers does it take to change a light

Once there was a group of vampire bats that lived

It is Rennaissance Italy and Lothario and his friend

1. I've smoked fatter joints than that. 2.

Three bears came out of hibernation and they were

What do you call a nice female midget who gives

Once upon a time there lived a woman in Brampton

This lady goes to the doctor for a check up. When

There was a man sunbathing on a beach naked. A

A state trooper spied a car puttering along at

An 80 year old man was having his annual checkup

A mystery-lover takes his place in the theater

A secretary goes to the company stockroom and requisitions

A travelling salesman is out in the country selling

A man was sitting next to a very attractive woman

Man who stick face in punchbowl get punch in nose.

Hallo? Is this Giganta? Giganta Crotchetta? Oh,

Two guys both have 9 a.m. appointments at a vasectomy

1) You try to enter your password on the microwave.

One night, a man with no voice and his friend went

One day the farmer walked out to his field to feed

This blonde gets pulled over by a cop, who walks

One day, two drunks were stumbling around in the

A guy is drinking in a bar, and the bartender asks

A blonde woman and a red-headed woman are taken

Q: What's the best time for a dental appointment?

One night, as a couple lies down for bed, the husband

A man was sitting at the bar in a watering hole

A man wanted to go on holiday in Ibiza because

A man is working at a pharmaceutical store, and

Q: Why was the blonde disappointed with her trip

Element: Woman Symbol: Wo Discoverer: Adam

A dying man gathered his best friends - a lawyer,

A wife comes home and tells her husband, “Dear,

SYMPTOM: Drinking fails to give taste and satisfaction,

There once was a boy who named Odd. A lot of people

A young Irish lad had fallen in love with a girl

Did you get any under the tree? I think your

There's this fellow with a parrot. And the parrot

Little Tommy runs into the bathroom one day to

1. Your reason for not staying in touch with family

(Sing to the tune of the Beverly Hillbillies)

These individual quotes were reportedly taken from

One day, a mother was taking a bath when her 5

The following are a sampling of REAL answers

Once there were 3 little pigs who lived together

Two men are approaching each other on a sidewalk.

Five men and one woman wash up on a desert island

A survey of top personnel executives of 100 major

A Scottish man, an Englishman and an Irishman were

This guy has always dreamed of owning a Harley

There were three women who always hung their laundry

    One day many years ago, a fisherman's

Ã, Ã, Ã,  A Frenchman, an Englishman and

    White House staffers were perplexed

Grandma went into Victoria's Secret and wanted

One day a group of eminent scientists got together

Some pretty 'useful' phrases you, too, can use

Doris and Fred had started their retirement years

"You see a lot of smart guys with dumb women,

Members of Congress...people of America....I banged

All-Purpose Excuse Form, designed to get you out

    BOOK is a revolutionary breakthrough in

A little old lady wanted to join a biker club. She

A man walks into a bar and says, "Excuse me,

A little boy is playing with his new football and

A farmer has about 200 hens, but no rooster and

Ã, Ã, Ã,  Two young guys were picked up

One night, as a couple lies down for bed, the husband

1) You define summer as three months of bad

1. Sit in a straight, comfortable chair in a well-lighted

A man gets to his seat on the plane, and is surprised

A man had a terrible passion for baked beans, but

Three bulls heard via the grapevine that the rancher

In Scotland, the most important time for a young

    William and Mildred were married

A woman and man get into a car accident. Both

One Sunday a pastor asked his congregation to consider

    Psychologists have discovered

NICKNAMES If Laura, Suzanne, Debra and Rose

A married couple went to the hospital to have their

A young Bulgarian peasant girl of fourteen went

1) Page yourself over the intercom.  Don't

Why did the chicken cross the road? KINDERGARTEN

Remember the book "Men are from Mars, Women are

Donny is a 17-year-old ninth grader who is becoming

A couple, both age 67, went to a sex therapist's

1. In the company of females, intercourse

Run one lap around the office at top speed

    For all you guys out there who

Introductory Chemistry at Duke has been taught

A Scottish old timer is talking to a young man

September 15     

A large, powerfully-built guy meets a woman at

Three guys are drinking in a bar when a drunk comes

Malamute x Pointer = Moot Point, favorites of lawyers

In a train compartment a young couple and an elderly, somewhat ragged man were sitting. The girl looks

A blonde heard that milk baths would make her beautiful. She left a note for her milkman to leave

Next mood swing: 6 minutes I hate everybody, you're next. And your point is.............? I

I'm reading an incredibly interesting book about antigravity. "I just can't put it down." I am

I was barely sitting down when I heard a voice from the other stall saying: 'Hi, how are you?' I'm

I don't suffer from insanity; I enjoy every minute of it. I work hard because millions on welfare

The 6th grade science teacher, Mrs. Parks, asked her class, "What human body part increases to ten

A young monk arrives at the monastery. He is assigned to helping the other monks in copying the old

A man walks in a bank, gets in line, and when it's his turn he pulls out a gun and robs the bank! But,

On his way out of church after mass, Frank stopped at the door to speak to the minister. "Would it

In the days of the Wild West, there was a young cowboy who wanted more than anything to be the greatest

Michael was feeling ill at work, and left after lunch to go home. He walked into the house and found

A man went on a business trip to China and wanted to buy some gifts for his kids. He went to a shop

The inventor of the Harley-Davidson motorcycle, Arthur Davidson, died and went to heaven. At the

A World War II pilot is reminiscing before school children about his flying days during the war.

Four college friends were so confident that the weekend before finals, they decided to go up to Dallas

Customer: Hi. How much is your paint? Clerk: Well, sir, that all depends on quite a lot of things. Customer:

Teaching Math in 1950: A logger sells a truckload of lumber for $100. His cost of production is 4/5 of

A lady is throwing a party for her granddaughter, and had gone all out..... a caterer, band, and a

Bad Metaphors from Stupid Student Essays (actually these are mostly similes, see Literary Terms) Her

1.. My husband and I divorced over religious differences. He thought he was God and I didn't. 2..

Have You Ever Been Guilty Of Looking At Others Your Own Age And Thinking, "surely I Can't Look

Me: Hello. AT&T: Hello, this is AT&T. Me: Is this AT&T? AT&T: Yes, this is AT&T. Me: This is

A 90-year-old man said to his doctor, "I've never felt better. I have an 18-year old bride who is pregnant

Walking up to a department store's fabric counter, a pretty girl asked, "I want to buy this material

At the end of the tax year, the Tax Office sent an inspector to audit the books of a synagogue. While

Old tribal wisdom says that when you discover you are riding a dead horse, the best strategy is to

I was out walking with my 4 year old daughter. She picked up something off the ground and started to

1. You must first learn to pronounce the city name, it is L. A. 2. The morning rush hour is from

On the first day of college, the dean addressed the students, pointing out some of the rules: "The

TO: MR. JAMES THATCHER, BRAND MANAGER, PROCTER & GAMBLE. Dear Mr. Thatcher, I have been a loyal

This is a true account recorded in the incident log of Jasper Cty, SC Sheriff's Office. An elderly

Walking up to a department store's fabric counter, a pretty girl asked, "I want to buy this material

A young boy had just gotten his driver's license and inquired of his father if they could discuss his

Three guys are drinking in a bar when a drunk comes in, staggers up to them, and points at the guy

Bobby-Joe was riding in Jeds truck Jed pulled over, got out and pointed down yawnder and said, "Thats

When young Jose, newly arrived in the United States, made his first trip to Yankee Stadium, there were

As You Slide Down the Banister of Life, Remember: 1. Jim Baker and Jimmy Swaggert have written an

A blonde heard that milk baths would make her beautiful. She left a note for her milkman to leave

An Italian, an Irishman and a Chinese fellow are hired at a Sydney construction site. The foreman

Sitting on the side of the highway waiting to catch speeding drivers, a State Police Officer sees a

1. When computing, whatever happens, behave as though you meant it to happen. 2. When you get to

A couple arrived at town hall seconds before closing time, and caught a judge just as he was about

A little boy and girl go trick or treating. They knock on the door of this house and the man who

I will seek and find You . . I shall take you to bed and have my way with you. I will make you ache,

The wife comes home early and finds her husband in their master bedroom making love to a beautiful,

"Hillary Clinton's 506-page memoirs has come out. So much of her personality shines through, that

The Internal Revenue sends their auditor (a nasty little man named Shea) to audit a synagogue. The

MONDAY: It's fun to cook for Tom. Today I made angel food cake. The recipe said beat 12 eggs separately.

Here's a prime example of "Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus" offered by an English professor

Two scottish nuns have just arrived in the USA by boat and one says to the other, "I hear that the

According to the FBI, most modern-day bank robberies are "unsophisticated and unprofessional crimes,"

A little old lady goes into the store to do some shopping. She is bewildered over the large selection

A father believed that his son was spending way too much time playing computer games. In an effort

A young boy had just gotten his driver's permit and enquired of his father, if they could discuss

Three convicts were on the way to prison. They were each allowed to take one item with them to help

These three men went into business together and the first one said: "I put up sixty-five percent

I pulled into the crowded parking lot at the Super Wal-Mart Shopping Center and rolled down the car

A guy went to his travel agent and tried to book a two-week cruise for himself and his lady friend.

A little boy and a little girl attended the same school and became friends. Every day they would sit

At one point during a game, the coach called one of his 7-year-old hockey players aside and asked,

A Frenchman, an Englishman, and a New Yorker were captured by cannibals. The chief comes to them and

I, __________________________, being of sound mind and body, do not wish to be kept alive indefinitely

Three bulls heard via the grapevine that the rancher was going to bring another bull onto the ranch,

A 90-year old man said to his doctor, "I've never felt better... I have an 18-year old bride who is

It was last Wednesday night, and I was sitting in my room watching television when the phone rang. "Hello?" A

An old Italian Mafia Don is dying and he called his grandson to his bed. "Grandson I wanna you lisin

A man and his friend were enjoying Deer Hunting Season in rural Arkansas near a blacktop highway. A

Four friends, who hadn't seen each other in 30 years, reunited at a party. After several drinks, one

Hello, my name is William and I suffer from guilt for not forwarding 50 billion fucking chain letters

Teaching Math in 1950: A logger sells a truckload of lumber for $100. His cost of production is 4/5

Customer: Hi. How much is your paint? Clerk: Well, sir, that all depends on quite a lot of things. Customer:

--Dr. Richard Byrnes, Seattle, WA One day I had to be the bearer of bad news when I told a wife

"Remember, never ask a geek "why"; just nod your head and back away slowly... " Dan Wineman Memory

If Recipes were like tax forms.... * Line 1. Butter, a minimum of half a pound (8 oz.), but not

After three weeks in the Garden of Eden, God came to visit Eve. "So, how is everything going?" inquired

A man and woman were having marriage problems, and decided to end their union after a very short time

The power mower was broken and wouldn't run. A lady kept hinting to her husband that he should get

How many dogs does it take to change a light bulb?" Golden Retriever: The sun is shining, the day

Useful phrases when dealing with the general population. Try to incorporate these into your conversations

Sitting on the edge of the highway waiting to catch speeders, a state police officer saw a car driving

A tourist wanders into a back-alley antique shop in San Francisco's Chinatown. Picking through the

Q: I've heard that cardiovascular exercise can prolong life. Is this true? A: Your heart is only

10. Your top player scores 20 points a game, but most of them are in the wrong basket. 9. You spend

This is a true story.. An elderly Florida lady did her shopping, and upon returning to her car,

Dr. Phil was conducting a group therapy session with four young mothers and their small children. "You

At a Senior Citizen's luncheon, an elderly gentleman and an elderly lady truck up a conversation and

To the citizens of the United States of America: In the light of your failure to elect a competent

A hillbilly went hunting one day in Oklahoma and bagged three ducks. He put them in the bed of his

I think Santa Claus is a woman .... I hate to be the one to defy sacred myth, but I believe he's

Miss Bea, the church organist, was in her eighties and had never been married. She was much admired

Back in the time of the Samurai there was a powerful emperor who needed a new head Samurai so he sent

Some people say that I'm superficial, but that's just on the surface. On one hand, I'm indecisive;

Little Johnny sees his Daddy's car passing the playground and going into the woods. Curious, he follows

A Russian and an Newfoundland wrestler were set to square off for the Olympic Gold medal. Before the

Ralph returns from the doctor and tells his wife that the doctor has told him he has only 24 hours

1. I can see your point, but I still think you're full of sh*t . 2. I don't know what your

WASHINGTON, DC (AP) - Congress approved sweeping legislation, which provides new benefits for many

It was the first day of school in Marietta, Georgia, and a new student named Suzuki, the son of a Japanese

1. Jesse Jackson, Jim Baker and Jimmy Swaggert have written an impressive new book. It's called "Ministers

Someone out there either has too much spare time or is deadly at Scrabble. (wait till you see the

A farmer has three sons. One day, his oldest boy comes to him and pleads with him that he is graduating

Two guys were picked up by the cops for smoking dope and appeared in court before the judge. The

A team of American and British archaeologists was excavating in Israel when they came upon a cave.

A man attempting to set up his new printer called the printer's tech Support number, complaining about

Here's why . According to today's regulators and bureaucrats, those of us who were kids in the 40's,

A cab driver pulled up at a stop sign near Central Park in New York. A stark naked woman jumped out

Aussies: Dislike being mistaken for Pommies (Brits) when abroad. Canadians: Are rather indignant about

Last year, when the power mower was broken and wouldn't run, I kept hinting to my husband that he

A white-haired old man walked into a jewelry store on a Friday, with a beautiful young lady at his

SYMPTOM - Feet cold and wet. SOLUTION - Glass being held at incorrect angle. Rotate glass so that

A woman has had serious headaches for several years and has tried everything; been to several doctors

A large woman wearing a sleeveless sun dress walked into a pub in England. She raised her right arm

The day finally arrived; Forrest Gump dies and goes to Heaven. He is at the Pearly Gates, met by St.

George Bush goes to a primary [elementary] school to talk about the war. After his talk, he opens

A man comes into the ER and yells, "My wife's going to have her baby in the cab!" I grabbed my stuff,

One day an Irishman, who has been stranded on a desert island for over ten long years, sees an unusual

A dedicated shop steward was at a convention in Las Vegas and decided to check out the local brothels.

A 90-year-old man said to his doctor, "I've never felt better. I have an 18-year-old bride who is

A Russian and an American wrestler were set to square off for the Olympic Gold Medal. Before the final

1. If you've known a guy for more than 24 hours, his sister is off limits forever! Unless you actually

FINE This is the word women use to end an argument when they feel they are right and you need to

Here are some conversations that actually happened between help desk people and their customers. Customer:

A blonde, a brunette and a redhead all tried out for the same job as road stripers. The boss told

An office manager was given the task of hiring an individual to fill a job opening. After sorting through

Once upon a time in the Kingdom of Heaven, God was missing for six days. Eventually, Michael the Archangel

An eighteen-year-old Italian girl tells her mom that she has missed her period for two months. Very

You are different and that's bad. Pop goes the hamster......and other great microwave games. What

10. "Clocks are five hours fast" 9. "Everybody's speaking some crazy foreign language" 8. "Harry

Students in an advanced biology class were taking a mid-term. The last question, worth 70 points or

A customer service award should go to the United Airlines gate agent in Denver for being so clever

These are actual analogies and metaphors found in high school essays. Her face was a perfect oval,

A guy went to a psychiatrist because he was having severe problems with his sex life. The psychiatrist

A Policeman was drilling 3 blondes, who were training to become detectives. To test their skills in

While riding one day, a cowboy met an Indian riding along with a dog and a sheep and he began a conversation.

Rome did not create a great empire by having meetings, they did it by killing all those who opposed

CLASSIC VERSION: The ant works hard in the withering heat all summer long, building his house

At one point during a game, the coach said to one of his young players, "Do you understand what cooperation

I took some friends out to dinner last week, and I noticed a spoon in the shirt pocket of our waiter

A friend and I were standing in line at a fast-food restaurant, waiting to place our order. There

A plastic surgeon invented a radical new face lift procedure and was explaining it to a prospective

The 6th grade science teacher, Mrs. Parks, asked her class, "Which human body part increases to 10

The stockbroker received notice from the IRS that he was being audited. He showed up at the appointed

Boudreaux went into the fish market to apply for a job. The boss thought to himself - I'm not hiring

A blonde named Mary decides to do something really wild. Something she hasn't done before, so she

The Smiths were unable to conceive children, and decided to use a surrogate father to start their

I had an appointment to see a urologist who shared an office with several other doctors. The waiting

A preacher went to his church office on Monday morning and discovered a dead mule (jackass to the

Jones came into the office an hour late for the third time in one week and found the boss waiting

A linguistics professor was lecturing to his class one day. "In English," he said, "a double negative

A group of girlfriends are on vacation, when they see a 5-story hotel with a sign that reads, "For

These three men went into business together and the first one said: "I put up sixty-five percent

A mild-mannered man was tired of being bossed around by his wife so he went to a psychiatrist. The

A man returns from the doctor and tells his wife that the doctor has told him he has only 24 hours

A married couple went to he hospital to have their baby delivered. Upon their arrival, the doctor

A little boy and a little girl are playing. The little boy pulls down his shorts and says, "*I* have

Doctor: "I see you're over a month late for your appointment. Don't you know that nervous disorders require

A missionary who had spent years showing a tribe of natives how to farm and build things to be self-sufficient

Add It Up: Relationship Guide For all you guys out there who just can't figure it out, here it is:

Alice was becoming frustrated by her husband's insistence that they make love in the dark. Hoping

The ambassador of a small African nation chanced to visit Russia, and was entertained by his opposite

A policeman was patrolling a local parking spot overlooking a golf course. He drove by a car and saw

These four friends were so confident that the weekend before finals, they decided to go up to Dallas

DEMOCRAT: You have two cows. Your neighbor has none. You feel guilty for being successful. You

After having their 11th child, an Alabama couple decided that was enough, as they could not afford

Thank you. We're all refreshed and challenged by your unique point of view. The fact that no one

This woman goes to a pet store to purchase some dog food. She puts the bag of food up on the counter

A little old lady wanted to join a biker club. She knocked on the door of a local biker club and a

1. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us. 2. Learn to work the toilet seat; if

There was a girl who went to sunday school and always fell asleep. One day the teacher asked and pointed

For those of you who have lived in Texas, you know how TRUE this is! They actually have a chili

A gynecologist who had lost interest in his medical practice decided to change careers and enrolled

A young couple is out carousing one evening. While driving down the highway the guy says to the girl,

An old man was in bed with his wife when suddenly he let out a loud fart. He yelled, "7 points!" His

Mrs. Peterson phoned the repairman because her dishwasher quit working. He couldn't accommodate her

A policeman was interrogating 3 blondes who were training to become detectives. To test their skills

A nervous taxpayer was unhappily conversing with the IRS tax auditor who had come to review his records.

A chemistry instructor wanted to teach his ninth grade class about the evils of liquor, so he created

At Cambridge University during an examination one day a bright young student popped up and asked the

The teacher was telling her students in the sex education class about human anatomy. She took her pointer

Back in the early 80's Chevy Chase was one of the stars on Password. Toward the end of the game this

A rabbit broke out of the laboratory where he had been born and raised. As he scurried away, he felt

Lion wakes up in the jungle and finds that a tool is missing, he goes to elephant and asks "Have you

The FAA has a device for testing the strength of windshields on airplanes. They point this thing at

A Brit, a Frenchman and a Russian are viewing a painting of Adam and Eve frolicking in the Garden of

Some not too smart gangsters decide to rob a bank. After several days of planning they agree on the

An elderly lady finished her shopping and, upon return to the parking lot, found four men in her car.

A woman is becoming increasingly worried that she might never find a mate. She wonders if there is

It's the first of April, and Joe is out of town on business. He returns home to find out that his wife

Five doctors went duck hunting one day. Included in the group were a GP, a pediatrician, a psychiatrist,

A tourist wanders into a back-alley antique shop somewhere in Washington DC. Picking through the objects

Hank was amazed at the length of the funeral procession going down Main Street. Watching awhile he

In a train compartment, there are 3 men and a ravishing young girl. The four passengers join in conversation,

On the first day of college, the Dean addressed the students, pointing out some of the rules. "The

A man goes into a pet shop and tells the owner that he wants to buy a pet that can do everything. The

Two Scottish nuns have just arrived in the USA by boat and one says to the other, " I hear that the

A blonde goes into work one morning crying her eyes out. Her boss concerned about all his employees well

Programmer compiled an array of reasons as to why he can't find a girlfriend with a good on her , reason