pulled

On a rural road a state trooper pulled this farmer over and said: "Sir, do you realize your wife fell

A computer science student is studying under a tree and another pulls up on a flashy new bike. The first

Patient : How much to have this tooth pulled?Dentist : $90.00.Patient : $90.00 for just a few minutes

The new hooker just finished her first trick. When she came back down to the street , the seasoned veterans

This one is long but well worth reading!In case your frustration level rises today, this is for everyone

I stopped at a fast food restaurant recently. I was fascinated by a sign which offered fat free french

A blond man showed up at work one day with a black eye. When his co-workers saw him they asked him what

The madam opened the brothel door to see a rather dignified, well-dressed good looking man in his late

The other day, my friends and I went to a "Ladies Night Club."One of the girls wanted to impress the

First-year students at a Medical School were receiving their first anatomy class with a real dead human

Three men stand before St. Peter awaiting admission into Heaven. However, St. Peter has been informed

A guy walks into a bar with his pet monkey. He orders a drink and while he's drinking, the monkey starts

Once there was this doctor that moved out to the country to become a farmer. He said to himself, "Well,

A few fraternity brothers needed to fill a science requirement in order to graduate, so they spent weeks

Have you ever asked your child a question too many times? Well, I hope you remember my story when they

George W. was out jogging one morning along the

Ralph and Edna were both patients in a mental hospital.

A guy was speeding down the road when suddenly

One day a man forgot to tell his wife the couches

Once upon a time there were three little pigs.

A motorcycle cop pulled over a Lamborghini Diablo

A driver was pulled over by a police officer for

It was a dark, foggy night. A man was wandering

George W. Bush was out jogging one morning when

A seismologist, a meteorologist, and a fireman

One day, a blonde left work early to go home and

A very successful lawyer parked his brand-new Lexus

A husband and wife entered the dentist's office.

A farmer just got married and was going home on

A man went to a cafe and ordered some soup. Half

Buy me a beer if you want the story told Of why

A guy came home one day after getting fired from

A guy walks into a bar with his pet monkey. He

Oil Change instructions for Women: Pull up to

A highway patrol officer was driving up a mountain

An Alabama man turned 18 and went to a local house

A guy was standing in front of the gorilla cage

A blonde walked into her final exam very nervous.

I'M GLAD I'M A MAN I'm glad I'm a man, you better

Late one Friday in Dublin, a policeman spotted

10) You wake up at 3 am to go to the bathroom,

In class one day, Mr. Johnson pulled Johnny over

A new contract for Santa has finally been negotiated.

Police arrested Joe Bloggs, a 27-year old white

Jack and Jill Went up the hill To smoke some marijuana Jack

A traveling salesman checked into a futuristic

George set out on a very windy day to see his friend

A Texan, a Californian and a Seattlite were all

One day, a man went into the doctor because he

An elephant was walking through the jungle one

There was an older man who'd married a younger

1. People who point at their wrist while asking

Barnum & Bailey was transferring the circus from

Your mama is so dumb when she was pulled over for

A little boy came home from school one day and

A little boy, wearing a big red fire hat, was riding

All drivers for Red Ball Express had orders to

A guy went to a whore house and asked the lady

There were three boys all in third grade: an Asian

Harold and Lloyd were speeding down the road when

The Pope goes to New York. He is picked up at

Billy's homework assignment is to think of a true

There was a guy, who was the most buff guy, and

A man walks into a bar and sees a large chest of

This guy who works at a pickle factory comes home

This Avon lady was out selling her wares. She

In the realm of the Mighty King Gates who has pulled

Billy was 14 and just started jerking off. He loved

A very successful lawyer parked his brand-new Lexus

It's Saturday morning and Bob's just about to set

An Eskimo man awoke one day with the urge to go

A man is driving home, when is pulled over by a

A sailor and a pirate walk into a bar. They sit

A guy with two black eyes walks into church one

There was this man who had a dog. Every Sunday

Three guys were in a bar and they heard a woman

Little Red Riding Hood was packing her things.

A guy was riding down the road when he saw a

Yo mama is so fat that when I took her to a buffet,

Three vampires walked into a bar. The first one

A man is driving with wife, when he is pulled over

A married couple was walking down the street when

In a small town in California there lived two boys,

There was once three roughnecks named Crap, Manners

This mafia family was in need of a collection

A penguin was driving his car down the highway

A man named Jed went hunting near the border of

There was a blonde driving down the road one day.

Little Johnny walked in one day on his daddy in

The Smiths had no children and decided to use a

A fellow bought a new Mercedes and was out on an

A cop pulled over a car for swerving all over the

A blonde is walking down the street and a car pulled

A man had an idea that could make him rich. After

A blonde was swerving all over the road and driving

There was a chicken farmer who owned a talking

Once there was this man whose car broke down.

A group of guys are on their way to a party, but

Q: What did the blonde do after she brushed her

A state trooper spied a car puttering along at

By the time a Marine pulled into a little town,

There was a vampire who walked into a vampire bar

A biology class student conducted an experiment

1. I can't reach my license unless you hold my

This blonde gets pulled over by a cop, who walks

A police officer pulled over a driver and informed

A man got pulled over by a cop because he was

Yo Mama is so stanky, she put a cucumber in her

Fred, Bob, and Mike were driving down the street

This elderly lady went to the doctor for a check-up.

A nun was telling some other nuns about how she

Bob, a lawyer, was driving home over the Golden

A young man joined the Army and signed up with

A man walked into work on Monday with two black

An elderly couple decided to take a cruise to spice

Ghost Poopie- The kind where you feel the poopie

There was a chicken and a horse playing together

Two 6 year old boys were attending religous school

It's a nasty day, and a guy gets pulled over for

10. Likes people that oppress him: teachers, parents,

A young priest was visting a convent. One day he

Q: Why is a fire truck red? A: If someone

A little boy was playing in his sandbox when the

A car decided not to stop for a stop sign but

A newlywed couple were on their honeymoon and were

A blonde's car had broken down. A cop pulled up

One morning, a man approached the first tee, only

A man and a woman were on a nude beach when a wasp

A businessman was about to go on a long business

There were three men working at the top of a building.

Two guys were hiking through the jungle when they

Bubba died in a fire and his body was burned pretty

A survey of top personnel executives of 100 major

A guy heard from his doctor that masturbating before

    One day many years ago, a fisherman's

Twas the Night before Christmas, and all through

At the 1994 annual awards dinner given for Forensic

An Amish lady is trotting down the road in her

A horse and a chicken are playing in a meadow. 

A horse and a chicken are playing in a meadow.

The other day, my friends and I went to this Ladies

A fellow bought a new Corvette and was out on an

A women desperately looking for work goes into

Clyde died in a fire and was burnt pretty bad and

Ethel is a bit of a demon in her wheelchair and

A Denton, Texas man was arrested for filing a false

    What to not say to the nice

But Doctor, You HAVE To! In Turkey, Mehmet Esirgen, 52,

A guy walks in to a bar with his pet monkey. He

A man and his wife entered a dentist's office.

    Stupid people should have to

Marge was in bed with a man (not her husband).

    One day a hunter was walking

A truck driver stopped at a roadside diner for

An Ohio State University mortician student walked

By the time a Marine pulled into a little town,

    An OHIO STATE UNIVERSITY mortician

One day at the end of class, little Johnny's teacher

    Dear Son,    

The bartender was washing his glasses when an elderly

Charlie's wife, Lucy, had been after him for several weeks to paint the seat on their commode. Finally,

Next time you have a bad day at work...think of this guy: Rob is a commercial saturation diver for

A nice, calm and respectable lady went into the pharmacy, walked up to the pharmacist, looked straight

Police arrested Malcolm Davidson, a 27 year-old white male resident of Wilmington, NC, in a pumpkin

Katie Couric, Charlie Gibson, Brian Williams and a tough old US Marine Sergeant were captured by

A man returning home a day early from a business trip, got into a taxi at the airport after midnight,

Joan, who was a rather well-proportioned secretary, spent almost all of her vacation sunbathing on

An Amish lady is trotting down the road in her horse and buggy when she is pulled over by a cop. "Ma'am,

One day, Jimmy Jones was walking down Main Street when he saw his buddy Bubba driving a brand new pickup. Bubba

A terrific explosion occurs in a gunpowder factory, and once all the mess has been cleared up, and

A very traditional elderly woman was enjoying a good game of bridge with her girlfriends one evening.

The Pope just finished a tour of the East Coast and was taking a limousine to the airport. Since he'd

Marge was in bed with a man (not her husband). All of a sudden, they heard a noise downstairs. "Oh,

With my wife I don't get no respect. I made a toast on her birthday to 'the best woman a man ever had.'

A motorcycle patrolman was rushed to the hospital with an inflamed appendix. The doctors operated

Bobby-Joe was riding in Jeds truck Jed pulled over, got out and pointed down yawnder and said, "Thats

Saturday morning I got up early, put on my long johns, dressed quietly, made my lunch, grabbed my

The madam opened the brothel door to see a rather dignified, well-dressed good looking man in his late

An elderly couple were driving across the country. The woman was driving when she got pulled over

An Amish lady is trotting down the road in her horse and buggy when she is pulled over by a cop.

Three men die and meet Peter at the pearly gates. "In honor of this holy season," Saint Peter

During training exercises, the lieutenant driving down a muddy back road encountered another car stuck

Jack decided to go skiing with his buddy, Bob. So they loaded up Jack's minivan and headed north. After

This preacher was looking for a good used lawnmower one day. He found one at a yard sale that Little

A man was driving down a quiet country lane when out into the road strayed a rooster. Whack! The rooster

Bubba decided it was time to purchase a new saw to help clear his heavily timbered property. A salesman

Three convicts were on the way to prison. They were each allowed to take one item with them to help

I pulled into the crowded parking lot at the Super Wal-Mart Shopping Center and rolled down the car

A little boy and a little girl attended the same school and became friends. Every day they would sit

Saturday morning I got up early, put on my long johns, dressed quietly, made my lunch, grabbed the

A Georgia State Trooper pulled a car over on I-95 about 2 miles south of the Georgia/South Carolina

One year at Christmas my mom went to my sister's house for the traditional feast. Knowing how gullible

George W. was out jogging one morning along the parkway when he tripped, fell over the bridge railing

This is a story about a couple who had been happily married for years. The only friction in their marriage

As a court clerk, I am well-versed in the jury-selection process. First a computer randomly selects

A gas station in Mississippi was trying to increase its sales, so the owner put up a sign saying, "Free

Sitting on the edge of the highway waiting to catch speeders, a state police officer saw a car driving

A panda walked into a bar. He went up to the bar and said "I'd like a steak and kidney pie and a Coke

A hillbilly went hunting one day in Oklahoma and bagged three ducks. He put them in the bed of his

A West Virginia State trooper pulled over a pickup on I-79. The trooper asked, "Got any ID?" The

One day, when a seamstress was sewing while sitting close to a river, her thimble fell into the river.

A little old man shuffled slowly into an ice cream parlor and pulled himself slowly, painfully, up

A big-city lawyer was representing the railroad in a lawsuit filed by an old rancher. The rancher's

Three men died on Christmas Eve and were met by Saint Peter at the pearly gates. "In honor of

Harold was an old man. He was sick and in the hospital. There was one young nurse that just drove him

A cab driver pulled up at a stop sign near Central Park in New York. A stark naked woman jumped out

There were three boys all in third grade: an Asian boy, a Spanish boy and a redneck. They were trying

10. Sometimes stays in bed till after 6 am. 9. In his sock drawer, you find pictures of women

It's time once again to consider the candidates for the annual Stella Awards. The Stella's are named

The bartender was washing his glasses, when an elderly Irishman came in. With great difficulty, the

A blonde hurries into the emergency room late one night with the tip of her index finger shot off. "How

Clem pulled over the car by the side of the road and showed Jed where he'd first had sex. "It

man died and went to The Judgment. St. Peter met him at the Gates of Heaven and said, "Before you

Two men are driving through Pennsylvania when they get pulled over by a State Trooper. The cop walks

"Aim towards the Enemy." - Instruction printed on U.S. Rocket Launcher "When the pin is pulled,

John Madden was in Dallas to announce a football game one weekend when he noticed a special telephone

Two cars were waiting at a stoplight. The light turned green, but the man didn't notice it. A woman

1. When you get pulled over, say "What's wrong, ossifer, there's no blood in my alcohol?" 2. When

When you occasionally have a really bad day, and you just need to take it out on someone, don't take

Donald Duck and Daisy Duck were spending the night together in a hotel room. Donald wanted to have

The madam opened the brothel door to see a rather dignified, well-dressed good looking man in his

Police arrested Patrick Lawrence, a 22-year-old white male, resident of Dacula, GA, in a pumpkin patch

A woman desperately looking for work went into a factory. The personnel manager looked over her resume

Clem pulled over the car by the side of the road and showed Jed where he'd first had sex. "It was

One night a teenage girl brought her new boyfriend home to meet her parents, and they were appalled

two Old Ladies Were Outside Their Nursing Home, Having A Smoke, When It Started To Rain. One Of The

A blonde was speeding in a 35 mile per hour zone when a local police cruiser pulled her over and

The Smiths were unable to conceive children, and decided to use a surrogate father to start their

A man was out, driving happily along in his car late one Saturday night. Before too long, a cop pulled

By the time a Marine pulled into a little town, every hotel room was taken. "You've got to have

Bob, a lawyer, was driving home over the Golden Gate Bridge after spending a great day on the ocean

A burglar broke into a house one night. He shone his flashlight around looking for valuables and when

It's Saturday morning and John's just about to set off on a round of golf when he realizes that he

The ambassador of a small African nation chanced to visit Russia, and was entertained by his opposite

One afternoon while doing some work in the garden I noticed my dog dragging something under the fence.

A travelling salesman of agricultural machinery was on a three week tour through the hinterlands of

A farmer in the country noticed that a gentleman would fish at the lake (close to the farmer's house)

The story is told of a Mexican bandit who robbed a Texas bank of $250,000 and escaped across the river. A

A young man joined the Army and signed up with the paratroopers. He went through the standard training,

A new Mercedes owner was out on an interstate for a nice evening drive. The top was down, the breeze

After a long night of making love, the young guy rolled over, pulled out a cigarette from his jeans

A driver is pulled over by a policeman. Man: Is there a problem Officer? Officer: Sir, you were

Two guys driving through Texas get pulled over by a state trooper. The cop walks up and taps on the

A traveling salesman checked into a futuristic motel. Realizing he needed a haircut before his next

Ethel was a bit of a demon in her wheelchair and loved to charge around the nursing home, taking corners

A horse and a chicken are playing in a meadow. The horse falls into a mud hole and is sinking. He calls

By the time John pulled into the little town, every hotel room was taken. "You've got to have a room

One night a man walks into a bar with a pig. The bartender says to the man, "That's a great looking

A burglar broke into a house one night. He shined his flashlight around, looking for valuables, and

One day the Pope is coming to America in his Limo and he said to the driver, "Why don't you let me

A fellow was walking through a cemetery one dark and stormy night. As he got well into the cemetery,

John and David were both patients in a Mental hospital. One day while they were walking past the hospital

A blonde had just gotten a new sports car and was out for a drive when she cut off a truck driver.

A policeman pulled a car over and told the driver he had won $5,000 dollars in the seatbelt competition.

"I've pulled you over for speeding, Ma'am. Could I see your drivers license?" "What's a license???"

Back in the old Wild West, there were two blond cowpokes, Jeff and Dave. One day, the two were enjoying

A truck driver would amuse himself by running over lawyers he would see walking down the side of the

A lady was in the delivery room starting to deliver her baby. As the head came out it was dark

A male driver is pulled over by a cop and the following conversation takes place: Man: What's the problem