receive

US Presidential nominee Barack Obama may have beaten Hillary Clinton but he has lost a Gmail id by his

A little boy wanted $100 badly and prayed for two weeks but nothing happened. Then he decided to write

Customer: "I received the software update you sent, but I am still getting the same error message." Tech

A 54 year old accountant leaves a letter for his wife one Friday evening and read's:Dear Wife (that's

This one is long but well worth reading!In case your frustration level rises today, this is for everyone

Four friends reunited at a party after 30 years. After a few laughs and drinks, one of them had to go

TO: All employeesFROM: The bossDATE: August 3, 2000RE: Foul LanguageIt has been brought to management's

How do most men define marriage? A very expensive way to get your laundry done free.The most effective

A man suspected his wife of seeing another man. So, he hired a famous Chinese detective, Mee Lookee Yu,

A young couple decided to wed. As the big day approached, they grew apprehensive. Each had a problem

Caller: "Hello, is this Tech Support?"Tech: "Yes, it is. How may I help you?"Caller: "The cup holder

The following are a sampling of REAL answers received on exams given by the California Department of

John had just won first prize at a cat show and had received a 10-day cruise to the Puerto Rico. The

Mrs. Bacciagalupe comes to visit her son Anthony

Three men were in a sauna. An Italian, a German,

An atheist was taking a walk through the woods,

A gynecologist tired of his profession, and wanting

1. My fellow Americans, I have taken much into

In order to assure the highest levels of quality

A blonde walked into her final exam very nervous.

Q: Will I be reincarnated? A: Not unless there

A gynecologist was getting sick of his job and

1) The president is not in his/her office at this

This letter was started by a woman, like yourself,

Barnum & Bailey was transferring the circus from

A 55-year old man, who was born on May 5th, has

A man was in a bad accident and was injured. But

In order to assure the highest levels of quality

A mathematician, a philosopher, and a blonde all

A king wanted to improve the mood of his favorite

Joe enters the confessional and tells the priest

What do you call two brunettes and a blonde in

What do you get when you cross a dog with a telephone?

One day this Preacher decided that he would skip

A doctor was having an affair with his nurse. Shortly

* The last fight was my fault. My wife asked, ''What's

A panda bear walks into a restaurant and orders

A blonde goes to a doctor because both of her ears

A salesman from KFC walked up to the Pope and offers

The following are a sampling of REAL answers

A man was digging in his garden, when his shovel

The pentagon said they had too many generals running

Why did the 49ers hire two nuns and a prostitute?

A motorist was unknowingly caught in an automated

    This is an actual job application

      AT&T fired President John

I called a company and asked to speak to Bob.

A prisoner in jail receives a letter from his wife:

A wise old gentleman retired and purchased a modest

A woman is in bed with her lover, who also happens

Will the Real Dummy Please Stand Up?! AT&T

    DETROIT--With third-quarter

A few clowns short of a circus.Ã, Ã, 

A poor minister was having trouble managing his

Which Valentine's Day gift would you like? To determine

John invited his mother over for dinner. During

MICROSOFT NEWS RELEASE: It has come to our attention

Ã, Ã, Ã,  If you receive an e-mail

A little boy wanted $100 badly and prayed for two

The wedding date was set and the groom's three

Dress Code: 1) You are advised to come to work dressed according to your salary. 2) If we see

Dear employee: As a result of the reduction of money budgeted for all department areas, we are

A little boy wanted $100.00 very badly and prayed for weeks, but nothing happened Then

Teaching Math in 1950: A logger sells a truckload of lumber for $100. His cost of production is 4/5 of

In the past, employees were permitted to make trips to the restroom under informal guidelines. Effective

Dress Code: 1) You are advised to come to work dressed according to your salary. 2) If we see

The following is an exchange of correspondence between a customer and the Irish Railway Company: Larnrod

The Best and Worst Comments Received: "Text is useless. I use it to kill roaches in my room."

Me: Hello. AT&T: Hello, this is AT&T. Me: Is this AT&T? AT&T: Yes, this is AT&T. Me: This is

Congress Votes to Outsource Presidency, Washington, DC (AP) Congress today announced that the office

A guy receives an ad in the mail for a golf resort where everything costs one dollar. He jumps at the

(Actual letter from an Iowa resident and sent to his senator) The Honorable Tom Harkin 731 Hart

Recently someone was browsing through the 40th Anniversary Issue of Reader's Digest (dated Feb. 1962),

To all Employees: It has been brought to Management's attention that some individuals throughout

On some air bases the Air Force is on one side of the field and civilian aircraft use the other

Pretty soon, I won't be able to do anything except sit in my chair and read! I must send my thanks

here is a dangerous virus being passed electronically, orally and by hand. This virus is called Worm-Overload-Recreational-Killer

We've all had the annoying experience of calling up a hotline and waiting on the phone for eons to

Dear Employee: As a result of the reduction of money budgeted for department areas, we are forced

FROM: Patty Lewis, Human Resources Director TO: All Employees DATE: 1 October 2005 RE: Christmas

TO: Honorable Secretary of Agriculture Washington, D.C. Dear Sir, My friend, Buba Peterson,

A young girl on a year's training course in South Africa recently received a "Dear John" letter from her

Four friends, who hadn't seen each other in 30 years, reunited at a party. After several drinks, one

Hello, my name is William and I suffer from guilt for not forwarding 50 billion fucking chain letters

1) The new policy on sexual harassment includes your photo. 2) The Security guard makes a complete

1. I am currently out at a job interview and will reply to you if I fail to get the position. Be prepared

Differential Theory of US Armed Forces (Snake Model) upon encountering a snake in the Area of Operations

Mr. Smith goes to the doctor's office to get his wife's test results. The lab technician says to

A wealthy man was having an affair with an Italian woman for a few years. One night, during one

A young couple decided to wed. As the big day approached, they grew apprehensive. Each had a problem

This is an actual job application that a 17 year old boy submitted to McDonald's in Florida... and

You have two choices in life: You can stay single and be miserable, or get married and wish you were

Written by Phil Maggitti Going to War with the Army that We Want. WASHINGTON, D.C. - President

Thought you might enjoy this message I received from one of my more politically oriented friends.....

1. Never give me work in the morning. Always wait until 4:00 and then bring it to me.

I once received a fax with a note on the bottom to fax the document back to the sender when I was

RICH WIDOW LOOKING FOR MAN TO SHARE LIFE AND FORTUNE WITH THE FOLLOWING QUALIFICATIONS: 1. WON'T

Here are some conversations that actually happened between help desk people and their customers. Customer:

A man wonders if having sex on the Sabbath is a sin because he is not sure if sex is work or play.

1. Chicago Cubs outfielder Andre Dawson on being a role model: "I wan' all dem kids to do what I do,

A bald man with a wooden leg gets invited to a Halloween party. He doesn't know what costume to wear

Question: If you could live forever, would you and why? Answer: "I would not live forever, because

(Internal Revenue Service, an agency of the government to whom Americans pay taxes on their salary.) --Always

DRESS CODE It is advised that you come to work dressed according to your salary. If we see you

*A few clowns short of a circus *A few fries short of a Happy Meal *An experiment in Artificial Stupidity *A

The stockbroker received notice from the IRS that he was being audited. He showed up at the appointed

According to the Knight Rider News Service, the inscription on the metal bands used by the US Department

The staff at a local United Way office realized that it had never received a donation from the town's

The following is an actual question given on a University of Washington chemistry midterm. The answer

Lil' Johnny's mother took her 5 year old son with her to the bank on a busy Friday. They were in

Little Johnny and his family were having Sunday dinner at his Grandmother's house. Everyone was seated

A lawyer died. At the same moment, the Pope also died. They arrived at the gates of heaven at

We've all been there but don't like to admit it. We've all kicked back in our cubicles and suddenly

A magazine recently ran a "Dilbert Quotes" contest. They were looking for people to submit quotes

In France, the young assistant pastors do not live in the main rectory. That is reserved for the

One Friday morning, a teacher came up with a novel way to motivate her class. She told them that she

There was an engineer who had an exceptional gift for fixing all things mechanical. After serving his

A traveling salesman checked into a futuristic motel. Realizing he needed a haircut before his next

A drill sergeant was known to be brusque with his men. His lieutenant warned him to try to be more

A man received a bill for his as yet unused credit card stating that he owed $0.00. He ignored it and

David received a parrot for his birthday. The parrot was fully grown with a bad attitude and worse

A man suspected his wife was seeing another man, so he hired the famous Chinese detective, Chen

A blonde goes into work one morning crying her eyes out. Her boss concerned about all his employees well