stairs

A very sexually active woman tells her plastic surgeon that she wants her vaginal lips reduced in size

Little Johnny greeted his mother at the door after she had been out of town all week and said, "Mommy,

A man walked into a bar one night. He went up to the bar and asked for a beer."Certainly, sir, that'll

There was this little boy about 12 years old walking down the sidewalk dragging a flattened frog on a

The madam opened the brothel door to see a rather dignified, well-dressed good looking man in his late

Maria had just got married and being a traditional Italian, she was still a virgin. So, on her wedding

It's the Spring of 1957 and Bobby goes to pick up his date. He's a pretty hip guy with his own car. When

One day, after striking gold in Alaska, a Lonesome miner came down from the mountains and walked into

There's this guy who's in the market for a used motorcycle. Always wanted a nice big hog. So he's shopping

This boy has just taken his girlfriend back to her home after being out together, and when they reach

A psychiatrist advised his timid little patient to assert himself. "Don't let your wife bully you. Go

A fat man sees an ad that reads "Lose weight. Only

One morning, a man got on an elevator on the fourth

Two blondes meet in Heaven. "How did you die?",

A blond was taking a shower when the doorbell rang.

Oh, Jason, take me!" she panted, her breasts heaving

There is this old couple and they have been married

A little boy and a little girl were taking a bath.

A young man was lost wandering in a forest, when

Not to cuss. Not to cohabitate. Not to use that

Questions and answers selected from tests in Springdale,

This woman owned two Dachshunds, a male and a female. A

A man was having an affair with a married woman.

There was an old man named Bozo, and all he had

It's the spring of 1957 and Bobby, a pretty hip

What is black and charred and sits at the top of

One morning, seventy-five year old Marvin is

There was a young woman who lived with her grandmother.

Start with a cage containing five monkeys. In the

A pilot was forced to make a crash landing in a

One day a guy and a girl were making out in her

Once there was a blonde who really needed some

A guy dials his home and a strange woman answers.

A man walks into a bar and sees a large chest of

A man was driving along a dusty road, when he ran

A farm boy who had just finished his schooling

Two brothers went downstairs for breakfast, where

An almost blind guy walked into a sexy lingerie

It's Saturday morning and Bob's just about to set

A man walks into a whorehouse and hands the madam

There was this man who had a dog. Every Sunday

Q: What is your date of birth? A: July fifteenth.

One day this little girl's dad came home and she

Three girls asked their mother if they could invite

A couple is doing yard work and the wife goes to

A Jewish mother bought her son two pairs of socks

A man walks into a whorehouse looking for a little

Ole was on his death bed. But before he died,

There guy goes to a weight loss clinic and says

A couple was golfing one day on a very, very exclusive

A young boy walks into a whore house dragging a

A guy comes home early one day from work. And

A dying man smells his favorite oatmeal raisin

Bill and Joe go into a hotel. The hotel has 100

Every year, Grandma and her grandkids, Suzy, Jill,

A group of guys are on their way to a party, but

How do you confuse a blonde? Tell her to count

In a Bangkok dry-cleaner's shop: Drop your trousers

I just got a skylight put into my place -- the

Bill Clinton and Jesse Jackson are taking a post-workout

On the night of the prom, a boy's girlfriend is

A man and wife were celebrating their 50-year anniversary,

This man decided that on his birthday he was going

A 7-year-old and his 4-year-old brother are upstairs

Once upon a time there were three men lost in a

There were three blondes living together. Blonde

A guy is drinking in a bar, and the bartender asks

This hous wife got tired of being alone everyday

Three blonde friends were walking home from a party

One evening a mom and dad and two sons are watching

It's the spring of 1957 and Bobby goes to pick

Three lawyers died and went to hell. Satan told

A couple has just finished having sex. They ALWAYS

Little DJ has his first day at school. His Mom

When is a woman above a man? When the kitchen

What goes black, white, black, white, black, white,

A new guy in town walks into a bar and notices

A man is in bed with his wife when there is a knock

It was mailman George's last day on the job after

Three old ladies are sitting in a diner, chatting

A mother was walking down the hall when she heard

Two married buddies are out drinking one night

Jack comes home from school with a great big smile

It seems that a young couple had just gotten married

A guy gets home early from work and hears strange

A newlywed couple just moved into their new house.

Marge was in bed with a man (not her husband).

Date     It's the Spring of 1957

    Every night after dinner, Merle

An attorney arrived home late, after a very tough day trying to get a stay of execution for a client

A society lady runs into the employment office one day and demands a maid "right now". It seems

Joan, who was a rather well-proportioned secretary, spent almost all of her vacation sunbathing on

A 6 year old and a 4 year old are upstairs in their bedroom. "You know what?" says the 6 year old.

Maria had just got married and being a traditional Italian, she was still a virgin. So, on her wedding

The husband had just finished reading a new book entitled, "You Can Be THE Man Of Your House." He

A retired corporate executive, now a widower, decided to take a vacation. He booked himself on a Caribbean

A married fellow gets home early from work and hears strange noises coming from the bedroom. He rushes

A young girl from Ireland leaves home to find work in the bright lights of London. She comes home

An Englishman A Scotsman and an Irishman are all setting in a bar in New York discussing about how

Bad Metaphors from Stupid Student Essays (actually these are mostly similes, see Literary Terms) Her

Entries in a Dog's Diary: 7 am - Oh boy! A walk! My favorite! 8 am - Oh boy! Dog food! My favorite! 9

Marge was in bed with a man (not her husband). All of a sudden, they heard a noise downstairs. "Oh,

I met an older woman at a bar last night. She wasn't bad for 57, we drank and bullsh*tted a bit,

Hospital regulations require a wheelchair for patients being discharged. However, while working as

Paddy had been drinking at his local Dublin pub all day and most of the night celebrating St Patrick's

Two married friends are out drinking one night, when one turns to the other and says, "You know I don't

Dorothy and Edna, two "senior" widows, are talking. Dorothy: "That nice George Johnson asked me

A newlywed couple returned to their apartment after being on their honeymoon. "Care to go upstairs

The teenage granddaughter comes downstairs for her date with this see-through blouse on and no bra.

The madam opened the brothel door to see a rather dignified, well-dressed good looking man in his late

In a small town in alabama, joe bob decides it's time for his cousin, 19 year-old Billy Bob, to learn

# 10 Life is sexually transmitted. # 9 Good health is merely the slowest possible rate at which

It's the Spring of 1957 and Bobby goes to pick up his date. He's a pretty hip guy with his own car.

A man walked into a cafe, went to the bar and ordered a beer. "Certainly, Sir , that'll be one

Little Johnny had a cussing problem and his father was getting tired of it. He decided to ask his

Twas the day after Christmas, and all through the house, Every creature was hurtin', even the mouse. The

This is a story about a couple who had been happily married for years. The only friction in their marriage

An Irishman an Englishman and a Scotsman were sitting in a bar in Sydney. The view was fantastic,

An elderly man lay dying in his bed. In death's agony, he suddenly smelled the aroma of his favorite

It was George the Mailman's last day on the job after 35 years of carrying the mail through all kinds

After a night on the town, a young woman brought a new friend home for a late-night drink. "You can't

Who said men don't remember anniversaries? A woman awakes during the night to find that her husband

It's the spring of 1957 and Bobby goes to pick up his date, Peggy Sue. Bobby's a pretty hip guy

The following day, despite the sadness that weighed heavily on his heart due to the unfortunate death

Two married buddies are out drinking one night when one turns to the other and says, "You know, I don't

I used to eat a lot of natural foods until I learned that most people die of natural causes. Gardening

A nun, really needing to go to the bathroom, walked into a neighborhood pub. The place was hopping

In a small town in Tennessee, Big Bubba decides it's time for his son, 18 year old Billy Bob, to

One day, after striking gold in Alaska, a lonesome miner came down from the mountains and walked into

"OLD" IS WHEN... Your sweetie says, "Let's go upstairs and make love," and you answer, "Pick one,

These, are real answers given by children. Q: Name the four seasons. A: Salt, pepper, mustard and

This is a compilation of actual Church Bulletins and Service bloopers... Our next song is "Angels

The madam opened the brothel door to see a rather dignified, well-dressed good looking man in his

OK, I'm the only female in a house full of guys. 4 sons and a hubby. Toilet seat is never down...etc. SOOOOoooooooooo

It's Saturday morning and John's just about to set off on a round of golf when he realizes that he

Baby Bear goes downstairs and sits in his small chair at the big table he looks into his small bowl.

A couple were golfing one day on a very exclusive golf course, lined with million-dollar houses.

One day, after striking gold in Alaska, a lonesome miner came down from the mountains and walked into

A fellow decides to take off early from work and go drinking. He stays until the bar closes at

Little Johnny comes home from school with a note from his teacher, indicating that "Johnny seems to

A man is in bed with his wife when there is a rat-a-tat-tat on the door. He rolls over and looks at

Two children ordered their mother to stay in bed one Mother's Day morning. As she lay there looking

A guy gets home early from work and hears strange noises coming from the bedroom. He rushes upstairs

A henpecked husband was advised by a psychiatrist to assert himself. "You don't have to let your wife

An elderly couple, still very loving after all these years, is shocked when the woman's doctor says

Three women who work in the same office notice that their female boss has started leaving work early

A man decides to take off early from work and go drinking. He stays until the bar closes at 2am, at

Little DJ has his first day at school. His Mom was real worried, and when she picked him up from school

Every night after dinner, Merle took off for the local watering hole. He would spend the whole evening

A wife and her husband were having a dinner party for all the major status figures in Rome, Italy.

Two men are drinking in a bar at the top of the Empire State Building. One turns to the other and says:

Tommy is a young boy, just potty trained. When he goes to the bathroom though, Tommy manages to

It was George the mailman's last day on the job after 35 years of carrying the mail through all

A guy dials his home phone from work. A strange woman answers. The guy says, "Who is this?"