tomorrow

One night, as a couple lay down for bed, the husband gently taps his wife on the shoulder and starts

Ah Lum was asked to make a sentence using 1,2,3,4,5,6,7,8,9 & 10. Not only did he do it from 1 to 10,

Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson went on a camping trip. After a good meal and a bottle of wine, they lay

One sunny day in 2008, an old man approached the

1. Gain weight. At least 30 pounds. 2. Stop exercising.

Ignoring the fact that George Bush declined Saddam

A truck driver had a 2 day lay-over during the

Oil Change instructions for Women: Pull up to

1. Hijack wheelchairs and speed around the hallways.

"If we don't succeed, we run the risk of failure." ...George

A couple had been married for a long time, but

There was an old professor who started every class

One night a man rolls over in bed and gives his

Boris Yeltsin, Bill Clinton, and Bill Gates were

A blonde dies and arrives at the Pearly Gates,

A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead all work at

A farmer rears 25 young hens and one old cock.

There was this guy that went to the doctor to get

This guy dies and goes to heaven. When he gets

A man asked his wife if it was, perhaps, time for

There was this man who had a dog. Every Sunday

A pretty blonde woman is driving down a country

A young boy walks into a whore house dragging a

This old lady went to a doctor's office and told

Slash, a well-known murderer, had been on death

Grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot

A guy gets out of the V.D. Hospital and decides

Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson go on a camping

It's wise to remember how easily e-mail can be

A blonde was down on her luck. In order to raise

A man named George was new in the city and needed

One night, as a couple lies down for bed, the husband

This newlywed couple is in bed and the man rolls

You don't have to put cream in your coffee to

A tourist has been visiting Cuba for a week. He

A little old lady goes into the Chase Manhattan

A man from another country came to the U.S. and

There were three men working at the top of a building.

An old man and woman were married for years, even

Doris and Fred had started their retirement years

The following letters were taken from an actual

One night, as a couple lies down for bed, the husband

A little old lady went into the Bank of Canada

Three friends die in a car accident and they

20. The hole closed on him before he could penetrate

There was an Englishman an Irishman and

One day two deaf-mutes meet on the street. They

A man enters a barber shop for a shave. While the

A keen country lad applied for a salesman's job

Monica's Diary Entry 1 Dear Diary, I'm so excited!

I'm reading an incredibly interesting book about antigravity. "I just can't put it down." I am

I don't suffer from insanity; I enjoy every minute of it. I work hard because millions on welfare

Bill meets Doug shopping at the mall and sees he has a small gift wrapped box. "It's my wife's

A Minneapolis couple decided to go to Florida to thaw out during a particularly icy winter. They planned

A man enters a barbershop for a shave. While the barber is foaming him up, he mentions the problems

A film crew was on location deep in the desert. One day an old Indian went up to the director and

A man walks into a Doctors office and puts a note on the table in front of the Doctor. The note says:

The husband had just finished reading a new book entitled, "You Can Be THE Man Of Your House." He

1. They start paying everyone in sea shells. 2. The Dairy Queen on the corner is threatening a hostile

Customer: Hi. How much is your paint? Clerk: Well, sir, that all depends on quite a lot of things. Customer:

Entries in a Dog's Diary: 7 am - Oh boy! A walk! My favorite! 8 am - Oh boy! Dog food! My favorite! 9

1. The nicest thing about the future is that it always starts tomorrow. 2. Money will buy a fine

"Doctor," the embarrassed man said, "I have a sexual problem. I can't get it up for my wife anymore. "Mr.

The Lone Ranger and Tonto went camping in the desert. After they got their tent all set up, both men

An old man and woman were married for many years, even though, they hated each other. When they had

Eddie was in trouble. He forgot his wedding anniversary. His wife was really pissed. She told him "Tomorrow

An elderly couple, Ray and Bessie, are "snowbirds" in Texas. Ray had always wanted a pair of authentic

your breasts must think i'm good lookin cause they keep lookin at me. Hey baby, you keep running

It's wise to remember how easily email can be misused, sometimes unintentionally, with serious consequences. Consider

A pretty blonde woman is driving down a country road in her new sports car when something goes wrong

16. It's Hard To Kiss The Lips At Night That Chewed Your Ass Out All Day Long 15. If I Can't Be

A first grade school teacher in Virginia had twenty-five students in her class. She presented each

"Are you religious? Because I could be the answer to your prayers." "Is there an airport nearby

Annoyed by the professor of anatomy who liked to tell "naughty" stories during class, a group of female

MONDAY: It's fun to cook for Tom. Today I made angel food cake. The recipe said beat 12 eggs separately.

Slap Your Co-Worker Day is Coming!! May 22 is the official Slap Your Irritating Co-workers Holiday:

A blonde walks into the police department looking for a job. The officer wants to ask her a few questions.... Officer:

1. Gain weight. At least 30 pounds. 2. Stop exercising. Waste of time. 3. Read less. Makes you

Hello, my name is William and I suffer from guilt for not forwarding 50 billion fucking chain letters

Smart Ass Answer #5: A flight attendant was stationed at the departure gate to check tickets. As

Customer: Hi. How much is your paint? Clerk: Well, sir, that all depends on quite a lot of things. Customer:

From : Managing Director To : Executive Director "Tomorrow morning there will be a total eclipse

A young guy from Missouri moves to Florida and goes to a big "everything-under-one-roof" department

THE WIT AND THE WISDOM OF HOMER J.SIMPSON "Now son, you don't want to drink beer. That''s for Daddys,

While the barber is lathering the man up for his shave, the man expresses to the barber how he has

One night, a little blind boy's mother said to him, "Anthony, if you pray really, REALLY hard tonight,

Sam and Bessie are senior citizens, and Sam has always wanted an expensive pair of alligator cowboy

Accountant - Someone who knows the cost of everything and the value of nothing. Auditor - Someone

Attached is some correspondence which actually occurred between a London hotel's staff and one of

This year, I resolve to ... 1. Gain weight. At least 30 pounds. 2. Stop exercising. Waste of time. 3.

Three guys were sitting in a bar talking. One was a doctor, one was a lawyer, and one was a biker.

A white-haired old man walked into a jewelry store on a Friday, with a beautiful young lady at his

An old man and woman were married for many years, even though they hated each other. When they had

The day finally arrived; Forrest Gump dies and goes to Heaven. He is at the Pearly Gates, met by St.

I may not be Fred Flintstone, but I bet I can make your bed rock. I can't find my puppy, can you

A teacher was wrapping up class, and started talking about tomorrow's final exam. He said there would

Rome did not create a great empire by having meetings, they did it by killing all those who opposed

25. Get Your Tongue Outta My Mouth 'Cause I'm Kissing You Goodbye. 24. Her Teeth Was Stained, But

An old man in Phoenix calls his son in New York and says, "I hate to ruin your day, but I have to tell

A 75 year old man went to his doctor's office to get a sperm count. The doctor gave the man a jar

A man enters a barbershop for a shave. While the barber is foaming him up, he mentions the problems

After dying in a car crash, three friends go to Heaven for orientation. They are all asked the same

A couple from Minneapolis decided to go to Florida for a long weekend to thaw out during on particularly

Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson went on a camping trip. After a good meal and a bottle of wine, they

Annoyed by the professor of anatomy who liked to tell "naughty" stories during class, a group of

A magazine recently ran a "Dilbert Quotes" contest. They were looking for people to submit quotes

Dave was the vice-president of ACME inc. One day the president,Mr. Smith called him into his office.He

An elderly man in Phoenix calls his son in New York and says, "I hate to ruin your day, but I have

Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson went on a camping trip. As they lay down for the night, Holmes said:

An old man and woman were married for years even though they hated each other. When they had a confrontation,

A couple goes out to dinner to celebrate their 50th wedding anniversary. On the way home, she notices