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Original List aged 20: 1. Handsome 2. Charming 3. Financially successful 4. A caring listener 5.

US Presidential nominee Barack Obama may have beaten Hillary Clinton but he has lost a Gmail id by his

One day Bill Gates finally dies and goes to Heaven. Upon reaching the pearly white gates, he sees Saint

An Arab has spent many days crossing the desert without finding a source of water. It gets so bad that

Question : Ms. America, how do you describe a male organ in your country?Ms. America : Well, I can

Bob works hard and spends most evenings bowling or playing basketball at the gym. His wife thinks he

Three guys died and went to heaven. St Paul was there looking down at the three of them, one is a reknowned

An Arab has spent many days crossing the desert without finding a source of water. It gets so bad that

Continuing the current trend of large-scale mergers

A blonde goes into a music store and asks the guy

We have come to learn that bombing really works.

Dear Tech Support: Last year I upgraded from

Buy me a beer if you want the story told Of why

My genitals are so gigantic, and yours so woefully

(tip: don't try these if you're not willing to

A husband comes home early from work and catches

1. Hijack wheelchairs and speed around the hallways.

Log on, wait a sec, then get a frightened look

Original List (age 22): 1. Handsome 2. Charming 3.

The way this game works is every time the word

What do you call a woman who works as hard as a

A man hails a taxi, and gets inside. "5th and

"Do you ever get horny?" said one widow to the

This guy who works at a pickle factory comes home

If you throw a party, the worst thing you can do

There was a soldier that enlisted in the army to

Three guys were in a bar and they heard a woman

Three young boys were fighting over whose dad was

There's this Amish girl and she tells her mom that

1. I've smoked fatter joints than that. 2.

Two boys were arrested, one was drinking battery

A travelling salesman was out in the country one

I'm currently running the latest version of GirlFriend

Three women were sitting around talking about their

There are approximately two billion children (persons

One day a new vacuum salesman is going door-to-door

These individual quotes were reportedly taken from

A woman goes into a restaurant in a small town

If Oracle made toasters... They'd claim their

Five men and one woman wash up on a desert island

A blonde walked into a gas station and said to

Because Dave works hard at the plant and spends

You might be a redneck if... your lifelong goal

    There is a man who has three girlfriends,

Two couples were playing cards.  John accidentally

20) "That's weird..." 19) "It's

A couple comes up to a wishing well. The guy leans

Male Seminarsby Females 1.  Combatting 

1. Life is sexually transmitted. 2. Two wrongs

All-Purpose Excuse Form, designed to get you out

    BOOK is a revolutionary breakthrough in

"I'm going fishing." Really means... "I'm going

One day, a bus driver is on his route, when he

Two Texans were having the blue plate special at

But Doctor, You HAVE To! In Turkey, Mehmet Esirgen, 52,

There was once a young man who, in his youth, professed

Monica Lewinsky virus: Sucks all the memory

A man goes to the doctor with a long history of

1. Wear your glasses. Make sure your partner is actually in the bed. 2. Set timer for 3 minutes,

A society lady runs into the employment office one day and demands a maid "right now". It seems

"I'M GOING FISHING" Means: "I'm going to drink myself dangerously stupid, and stand by a stream

I have 2 dogs & I was buying a large bag of Pal at Big W and standing inline at the check out. A

Three contractors are bidding to fix a broken fence at the White House in D.C.. One from New Jersey,

A couple has a dog that snores. Annoyed because she can't sleep, the wife goes to the vet to see if

DRILL PRESS: A tall upright machine useful for suddenly snatching flat metal bar stock out of your

As You Slide Down the Banister of Life, Remember: 1. Jim Baker and Jimmy Swaggert have written an

Two married friends are out drinking one night, when one turns to the other and says, "You know I don't

A friend of mine has a big Labrador retriever. While I was buying a large bag of Purina at Wal-Mart

John works hard and spends two nights each week bowling and plays golf every Saturday. His wife

You can never tell which way the train went by looking at the track. Logic is a systematic method

It's out! Brand new edition of... "You know you're A redneck when......" 1. You take your dog for

Law of Mechanical Repair: After your hands become coated with grease your nose will begin to itch

Having a rough day? Just in case you've had a rough day, here's a stress management technique recommended

"What Happens Here, Stays Here" is getting old, so a contest is being held for new slogans. Here

History began some 12,000 years ago.(Actually, it was 40,000 years ago.) Humans existed as members

Jacob, age 92, and Rebecca, age 89, living in Florida, are all excited about their decision to get

Arbitrator ar'-bi-tray-ter: A cook that leaves Arby's to work at McDonald's. Avoidable uh-voy'-duh-buhl:

"Remember, never ask a geek "why"; just nod your head and back away slowly... " Dan Wineman Memory

If Recipes were like tax forms.... * Line 1. Butter, a minimum of half a pound (8 oz.), but not

1. Bob Smith, my assistant programmer, can always be found 2. hard at work in his cubicle. Bob works

The Iowa Wage and Hour Department claimed a man owning a small farm was not paying proper wages to

Differential Theory of US Armed Forces (Snake Model) upon encountering a snake in the Area of Operations

Leah phones her husband at work, "Izzy, do you have time for a chat?" "Sorry, darling, this is not

There was once a young man who, in his youth, professed his desire to become a great writer. When

I. There are approximately two billion children (persons under 18) in the world. However, since Santa

George Carlin Speaks Out... I Am Your Worst Nightmare. I am a BAD American. I am George Carlin. I

I know you have an interest in poker - here's a twist. Two couples were playing cards one evening.

1. Jesse Jackson, Jim Baker and Jimmy Swaggert have written an impressive new book. It's called "Ministers

I was riding to work yesterday when I observed a female driver cut right in front of a pickup truck,

A man attempting to set up his new printer called the printer's tech Support number, complaining about

Male Seminars by Females 1. Combatting Stupidity 2. You, Too, Can Do Housework 3. PMS: Learn

A woman has had serious headaches for several years and has tried everything; been to several doctors

1. "I can't find it." MEANS: It didn't fall into my outstretched hands, so I am completely clueless.

Jacob, age 92, and Rebecca, age 89, are all excited about their decision to get married. They go

CLASSIC VERSION: The ant works hard in the withering heat all summer long, building his house

I took some friends out to dinner last week, and I noticed a spoon in the shirt pocket of our waiter

Two old pensioners are taking a trip down memory lane by going back to the place where they first

An entire new strain of viruses has just been uncovered and we wanted to get this information to you

A man has spent many days crossing the desert without water. His camel dies of thirst. He's crawling

A group of girlfriends are on vacation, when they see a 5-story hotel with a sign that reads, "For

A mechanic was removing a cylinder head from the motor of a Harley motorcycle when he spotted a well-known

There was a man who had three girlfriends, but he did not know which one to marry. So he decided to

An elderly couple, still very loving after all these years, is shocked when the woman's doctor says

Two men are drinking in a bar at the top of the Empire State Building. One turns to the other and says: